Last night was divine. My husband took our boy grocery shopping, came back and put away all of the food, cooked & served a delicious fish dinner, cleaned the kitchen, tucked our boy into bed. I sat on the couch watching tv, eating cookies, sipping tea, and petting my favorite cat. I was as content as SF'er in a porn shop, I tell ya. So I'm sitting there all bloated with food and drink, waiting for the inevitable gas flare up, debating on another cookie, when the old man comes in and tells me to go to bed whilst grabbing my wrist and pulling me off the couch. "Gasp!" I says to myself, and sprint to the bathroom to make pretty with my naughty bits. Anywho, after ripping through 7 days worth of pussy vinage, downing a hydrocodone for my shoulder pain, a Corona for courage, and a mouthful of Rolaids in a vain attempt to ward off the impending gastic fireworks, I was as ready as I ever was gonna be. Walking into the bedroom after my shower, I notice the only light is a single candle burning near a large mirror at the foot of the bed. Hubby comes in and tells me to lay on my stomach, then he Wands my whole body,working scented oil in, from neck to toes.... I could go into detail about what happend next, but I'm a little shy, so, I just wanna say that when all was said and done, the Wand was smoking hot, there were various "marital aids" laying about the place, and cummy wash cloths littered the floor. Oh, and for the record, I did not fart. Oh yeah, I still got it!