ladies, are good looks essential?

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Hero0fDaHouse, Nov 25, 2007.

  1. Hero0fDaHouse

    Hero0fDaHouse New Member

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    when it comes to pure sexual attractice(lust), are looks the only thing that makes you feel the urge or are there other things? like, can an average looking guy be more desirable as a sex partner than a hot guy? what other qualities make you lust?
     
  2. On_Top

    On_Top New Member

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    Good looks are nice, but no they are not everything.

    A lot of things matter more. Have you ever found someone physically attractive and then found out they were rude and had the worst personality ever? Sure made them ugly didn't it?
     
  3. AnonymousOne

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    Some of us are just ugly on the inside and out. :ugh
     
  4. Barbwire

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    I thought this thread looked very familiar, so I did a quick search of all the other threads you have started. Why do you keep asking the same question over and over again? Are you really that insecure about your looks?
     
  5. ChargerBabe

    ChargerBabe New Member

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    The more I get to know someone the better-looking they become to me. I had never been attracted to one of my friends until recently. I have really gotten to know him and my view of him has totally changed. The more I get to know about him the more attractive he becomes to me.
     
  6. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    Identity revealed!

    The question was for ladies!
     
  7. AnonymousOne

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    I wasn't answering the question, I was making a witty/self-deprecating response to something else... sheesh.
     
  8. BassDude

    BassDude New Member

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    Hmmm...interesting question. I've always thought that I'd rather be "sexy" than "handsome". Turns out my wife has the same perspective...she'd rather be "sexy" than "gorgeous". I think that "handsome" or "gorgeous" are physical only attributes..."sexy" comes from the mind as much or maybe moreso than the body.

    BassDude
     
  9. Vanja

    Vanja New Member

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    It's aaaall about chemistry :eek:

    Self-confident but not cocky (no pun) and carries himself well.

    Then there's the "sex-look" in his eyes that does it for me :D

    The most amazing sex I ever had was with a guy who I didn't even like a lot personally. But oh lordeee the chemistry. And he was average looking.
     
  10. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    I know this question is directed toward the ladies and concerns their feelings about men, but what's the male take on this issue?

    With regards to your feelings about women, are good looks essential?
     
  11. BassDude

    BassDude New Member

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    Well, my opinion is "yes"...they don't have to be gorgeous, but they do need to be attractive and sexy...as said above, it's that chemistry thing. They can't be gross or anything, that's a complete turn-off (and I'm sure that's the same for women, right?)...but average looking with lots of sex appeal definitely works, gorgeous with lots of sex appeal is just icing on the cake! Put differently, I'd take average with lots of sex appeal over gorgeous with little or no sex appeal anyday. That's my opinion! :)

    I'm gonna steal from Bluesy here...she has to be able to lubricate her mind and my mind, no matter how gorgeous she might be on the outside.

    BassDude
     
  12. AnonymousOne

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    Bingo!

    I don't like shallow college girls. I don't like people who would rather spend their time talking about every single play in a football game rather than tackling something ... more intellectual. And I DON'T want to know why sex in the city is the greatest show in TV history.

    Attractiveness is a must but even that is subjective.

    So I'm not really sure what the question means. I mean would any of us date/sleep with/marry someone that we weren't attracted to in both the physical and sexual spheres.
     
  13. Bluesy

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    Agreed :tup Physical attraction is necessary for sexual chemistry, but I think you'll find that what constitutes "attractive" or "sexy" is very much in the mind of the beholder. Groom yourself well, dress handsomely, and remember that presentation is key...then just get out there and take a chance! The worst that can happen is that you'll get shot down, so you dust yourself off and start over again. You may not be that woman's "type", but the next woman might think you're hella hot :)

    I love how this "lubricate the mind" line is making the rounds! :brow
     
  14. BassDude

    BassDude New Member

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    Mind if I use that line as a song lyric sometime Bluesy? :dgrin

    Bingo...that is exactly right! Different folks are turned on my different things and have different preferences. Regardless of how you look (within reason of course), someone thinks you're hot! You've just got make contact with enough people that the ones who think you are hot become obvious...and hopefully out of those, there's some you'll think are hot. ;) Put the laws of averages on your side...

    BassDude
     
  15. Bluesy

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    Are you kidding?!?! It would be a tremendous honor! :bow (You'd better share the song with us!)
     
  16. pdicky

    pdicky New Member

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    i agree 100%. totally subjective. looks are good but if the person can stimulate you without even touching you its even better.
     
  17. boringsafetyguy

    boringsafetyguy New Member

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    don't hate me because I'm superficial

    I'm answering because it was asked about how the guys think in this thread about women's reactions. Sorry to interrupt, but someone already did.
    I agree it's subjective. I agree you start to love the appearance of people you like and who you get to know better. But in terms of love at first sight it's all about sight (and I think it goes equally for men and women since vision is the first contact we have with almost everyone). Depending on how much of an aesthete you are. If you are desperately into visual experience then you really treasure the appearance of a beautiful woman, to the point that it's like a torture or a prison of your own fetish: the need for the ultra pretty face and body.
    I don't think it's even much of a choice. If people could force themselves to be horny for someone (let's say, ugly) who was trying to flirt with them, they would. It would be so much easier to be satisfied without hunting or shopping. So, for those who are insecure about their looks, my advice is to forget about it. If some pretty creature can't even flirt with you because they find you physically unattractive, that's just a sign that they are dumb and can't crack a joke. They aren't going to be flirting with the beautiful person either, they'll just sleep with them and be dull all day after. They're the kind of person who, if you could get in their pants, would make you always wonder why they couldn't be cooler or more richly human. But I gotta admit, their physical hotness is desirable. Feels like life sucks when I put it that way.
     
  18. HardRocker

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    Ahh, the word of the day!
    I guess I should have known it existed, but I swear I've never heard anybody use it before.:idea Now I'll be going around looking for an opportunity to whip it out. I know just who to use it on.
     
  19. Bluesy

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    Sometimes I'll read something here and be left reeling from the shock of pure incredulity...I'll have go back and reread it a few times because I just can't believe I've actually read what I've read. This is one of those times :ugh

    An "aesthete" is an admirer of beauty, and that makes every human being an aesthete to a degree. But even the most ardent aesthete can separate their love of visual beauty from their love of people. You may spend hours admiring a painting or sculpture of a beautiful woman (or man), it may captivate and enthrall you, it may cause you to gasp and sigh from the intensity of admiration it evokes, but that doesn't mean you will then feel compelled to date only people whose beauty rivals that of an artistic masterpiece. I consider myself to be an aesthete of the highest order, but breathtaking aesthetic beauty is not a feature I look for in a partner. Trust me, the two do not go hand-in-hand. Though it is the most creative rationalization for shallowness I've yet to encounter :eyes

    So if you flirt with a woman and she doesn't reciprocate, that makes her "dumb" and "dull"? :ugh Why on earth should anyone feel obligated to flirt with a person they don't find attractive? Because they should take pity on them? Flirting is how you demonstrate sexual interest...It would be dishonest and degrading to engage in a flirtation when your heart isn't in it.

    *reels a bit more*
     
    #19 Bluesy, Dec 10, 2007
    Last edited: Dec 10, 2007
  20. minarchist

    minarchist New Member

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    Most guys can look good if they try to... If they take care of their hair/skin/body, and wear clothes that look good on them, I mean. I personally have a thing for guys that are nerdy/awkward, but cute at the same time... Also, looks aren't the only factors that contribute to physical attraction, for me... I happen to find it very sexy when guys are confident and sometimes kinky. ;-)