Just to make your partner happy...

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Sexual Person, Aug 3, 2014.

  1. Sexual Person

    Sexual Person Member

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    Do you really exactly have to do all of the sex moves they want you to do even though you don't like it?
     
  2. AGFUNK

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    No, you don't. They don't have to either. There's always compromise. If it hurts that's another story.
     
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  3. HotForHoney

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  4. Doitagain

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    Nope. Like AGFUNK said. Compromise. Having said that. I pretty much will do anything sexual if it turns on my partner even if the act by itself doesn't turn me on. My pleasure is their pleasure. If I see they are honestly very turned on or getting off I pretty much will do anything and the act will now be a turn on for me
     
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  5. biker061

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    Nope, compromise is key in a relationship. If someone pressures you to do anything you're not comfortable with it may be time to reconsider the whole thing!
     
  6. Sexual Person

    Sexual Person Member

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    What if they start saying that if you really loved them that you should do it for them?
     
  7. AGFUNK

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    Then they don't really give a crap about your feelings and they are not someone you should be with.
     
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  8. Li_hog_rider

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    I have to agree
     
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  9. Cappy_Dick

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    What she said...

    xx
     
  10. HotForHoney

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    Then they don't really love you.
    If they did, they would RESPECT you and your feelings.
     
  11. minskminx

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    What do you think love is closer to?

    Making someone do something you know they don't want to or not doing something because you don't want to make someone do something they don't want to?

    Easy question!
     
  12. Cappy_Dick

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    Quite.jpg
     
  13. 10_3XL

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    Everyone else that has posted above has pretty much said it all. Compromise and respect. If they pull the "Well, if you loved me..." card then that is some pretty blatant and classic manipulation. Also sends out warning signals that there is something hinky going on in your relationship.

    I, too, subscribe to Doitagain's philosophy. If it's turning my partner on and they're getting off on it then odds are very high that I am also turned on and getting off on the act. I cite the recent example from my life of taking the role of Sub rather than Dom. Hesitant at first; not particularly comfortable - but goddamn did she enjoy being the Domme! Her being so into it drove me wild.
     
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  14. Lizzie73

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    That is not a path you want to go down.

    You have to stand up for yourself and be yourself.

    If there is something you're uncomfortable with--tell him!
    Otherwise, you will be uptight about sex and unable to enjoy yourself.

    And, truthfully, you may be comfortable with these things in the future (I do tons of stuff now that I would never have considered when I was younger), but he has to give you the time and reassurance to make those choices for yourself. And if he won't, lose him and find somebody who will. Because if he's not willing to do that for you? He's probably not going to be a great lover or guy in the long run anyway.
     
  15. luvbug

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    Hes only thinking of himself and doesn't give a damn about you.
     
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  16. Doitagain

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    I don't like it when I find out that someone was doing things for me that they don't like and do it just because I do. I feel bad and it's a turn off. I would never push anyone to do anything they don't like. Did this dude actually use the line " if you love me you'll do it" ??? I feel like slapping him
     
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  17. rockypeak

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    hell nooooooooo. You gotta write your own story as a couple and find things you mutually enjoy. If there's anything else she wants, I'll give you my number and you can call me to fill in the rest.
     
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  18. tinyclit

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    It really depends on what you're being asked to do. If your dislike is physical or mental. If your dislike is just all mental, then you might be able to get over that and actually start enjoying the activity. But if it's a physical thing, then probably not!
     
  19. AtkCCC

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    Your statement pretty much nails how I feel. I have never been asked to do something that I found offensive, just some things I might not have initiated. Some things I like more than others, some things I will do to get my SO off that isn’t my fav.
     
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