Joke For The Day

Discussion in 'Games and Jokes' started by Love2BKinky, Jun 17, 2014.

  1. Love2BKinky

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    A man, returning home a day early from a business trip, got into a taxi at the airport. It was after midnight. While on route to his home, he asked the cabby if he would be a witness. The man suspected his wife was having an affair, and he intended to catch her in the act. For $100, the cabby agreed. Quietly arriving at the house, the husband and the cabby tiptoed into the bedroom. The husband switched on the lights, yanked the blanket back and there was his wife in bed with another man. The husband put a gun to the naked man's head. The wife shouted, "Don't do it! This man has been very generous! I lied when I told you I inherited money. He paid for the Corvette I gave you. He paid for our new cabin cruiser. He paid for your season Pittsburgh Steelers tickets. He paid for our house at the lake. He paid for our country club membership, and he even pays for the monthly dues!" Shaking his head from side-to-side, the husband slowly lowered the gun. He looked over at the cabby and said, "What would you do?" The cabby said, "I'd cover his ass with that blanket before he catches a cold."......................
     
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  2. Doitagain

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    Lol nice
     
  3. Love2BKinky

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    What Would Jesus Do?

    The light turned yellow just in front of him. He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.
    The tailgating woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.
    As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer.
    The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up..
    He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.
    After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door. She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.
    He said, "I'm very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you and cussing a blue streak at him. I noticed the 'What Would Jesus Do' bumper sticker, the 'Choose Life' license plate holder, the 'Follow Me to Sunday-School' bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, so naturally....I assumed you had stolen the car."
     
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  4. CaramelLady

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    I love this!
     
  5. Love2BKinky

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    I know. Right?
     
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  6. CaramelLady

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    Be careful of those that preach morality, especially from the pulpit ..some are the biggest hypocrites.
     
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  7. oldkid

    Guest

    Weightlifting commentator: "This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw
    her snatch this morning during her warm up and it was amazing."
    Blondebigtits.gif

    Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak
    from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
     
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  8. suzy7

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    When is a man most intelligent, before, after or during sex?

    During sex, because he is plugged up to the knowledge source.
     
  9. suzy7

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    A redhead tells her blond step sister,"I slept with a Brazilian!"
    The blond replies, Oh My God! You Slut! " How many is a Brazilian?"
     
  10. suzy7

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    What does it mean when a man is in your bed
    gasping for breath and calling your name?

    You didn't hold the pillow down long enough, sbxx
     
  11. suzy7

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    What's the difference between erotic and kinky?
    Erotic is using a feather--Kinky is using the whole hen sbxx
     
  12. blue_eyes18

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    What's gray and comes in quarts?

    An elephant.
     
  13. suzy7

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    Mother Daughter

    A mother walks into her daughter's room with a condon in her hand.
    I found this while I cleaned your dresses drawers today, are you
    sexually active??
    The daughter replies,"no I just lie there ! !"
     
  14. suzy7

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    A guy goes to the store to buy condoms. " Do you want a bag sir?'
    the cashier asks ? "Nah" the guy says," she's not that ugly "
     
  15. suzy7

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    What's the difference between a golf ball and a G-Spot?
    A guy will actually search for a golf ball,

    [​IMG]
     
  16. suzy7

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    Girl- Baby I'm wet
    Boy-want a paper towel?
    Girl-I want more then that xx
    Boy-want 2 paper towels
    Girl-no baby, I want something big and round
    Boy-danm, you want the whole roll! ! !
     
  17. suzy7

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    A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses
    She started her class by saying "Everyone who thinks they are stupid ,Stand up.
    After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up
    The teacher said ,"Do you think your stupid, little Johnny?"
    He said,"No Ma'am,but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself.


    [​IMG]
     
  18. suzy7

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    Men are like Bank Accounts. Without a lot of
    money, they don't generate much interest xx

    [​IMG]
     
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  19. jt _couple2012

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    Very true Suzy
     
  20. jt _couple2012

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