It hurts ME when trying to insert my penis into my girlfriend's vagina

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by grissom_pt, Feb 11, 2011.

  1. grissom_pt

    grissom_pt New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Hey

    I never had sex before I met my present girlfriend. She's not virgin. It happens that we've been trying to have sexual intercourse for 2 weeks now. Initially, I couldn't get my penis hard. Now I can, and it stays hard long enough - I already had some ejaculations by her hand.

    The current problem is: when I try to insert my penis into her vagina, I experience a lot of pain - and my penis actually gets injured - as I feel the skin of my penis being pulled. What could be happening? Is it lack of lubrication?

    Another facts that can help to the diagnosis =P:
    - My girlfriend's previous boyfriend also felt uncomfortable (I don't know if he experienced pain) if they did it without the condom.
    - I don't have any pre-cum fluid.
    --> From what I noticed, it doesn't hurt if I insert the penis with a condom, but when my penis is inside, it usually "shrinks" (not full erection, because of my inexperience) and the condom comes off. We're really tired of throwing condoms to waste because of this, and since she's taking the pill, and we're both disease-free, we want to do it without the condom.

    Thks in advance for any help
     
  2. GreyGoose

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    May 2, 2007
    Messages:
    950
    Likes Received:
    191
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NC
    Try some lube and see if that helps at all.
     
  3. Barbwire

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2007
    Messages:
    9,789
    Likes Received:
    174
    Gender:
    Female
  4. grissom_pt

    grissom_pt New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    loool. i don't think there're teeth in there. my fingers pass by unharmed.

    I forgot to mention that she's very wet, most of the time. Could there be lubrication problems despite that?
     
  5. Barbwire

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2007
    Messages:
    9,789
    Likes Received:
    174
    Gender:
    Female
    Get her off a few times BEFORE you attempt peenie thrustings. A pussy is like a fine automobile, you want to make sure she's good and warmed up before you take her out for a spin.
     
    #5 Barbwire, Feb 11, 2011
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2011
  6. wetness1

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2010
    Messages:
    1,247
    Likes Received:
    368
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Europe
    Practice the forplay and get her all nice and moist first ;)
     
  7. grissom_pt

    grissom_pt New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    It's not lack of foreplaying. If anything, TOO MUCH foreplaying. And we already did almost everything we could except the intercourse, so that kind of advice will not help, although I appreciate the concern. I was looking for someone who possibly experienced this kind of problem so he or she could tell me how they solved it. Right now I'm on vacations, away from her, and I'll see her on Monday. I already bought some appropriate lubricant, but I'd really like us to manage this we want so much =(. Anyone?
     
  8. Barbwire

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2007
    Messages:
    9,789
    Likes Received:
    174
    Gender:
    Female
    How hard of a cocksucker is she? I've gone at my hubby's dangler with such gusto that I've left blood blisters and made him sore for a day or two.

     
  9. dukefan

    dukefan New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2011
    Messages:
    309
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    nc
    Are you circumsized? Im not and if things are too tight it can tear the skin. The condoms may also be too tight and cause you to loose your hard on somewhat.
     
  10. grissom_pt

    grissom_pt New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Her vagina is definitely tight. I can tell that, even though I never saw any one else. I can hardly stick two fingers in there, and that with a lot of foreplay. And I am not circumcised. I already thought of that, but shouldn't uncircumcised penises "slide" better? What do you mean by "if things are too tight"? Will the lubricant help in my/our case?

    She doesn't suck much, I don't like it.
     
  11. Stefanie

    Stefanie New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2011
    Messages:
    77
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    VA
    This. ^ It's so, so true. :lol

    It's definitely a lack of lube. The only way the skin of your penis is going to be pulled and stretched painfully like that is if there isn't enough lube or it isn't the right consistency. Remember, wetter sex is better sex - for both of you. She may get very wet, but it still may not be enough, or her own lubricant might be too watery or dry up too quickly. Get yourself a good, thick water-based lube. If you don't have a sex shop near you or the option to buy online, try to find Wet water-based lube - they're a pretty good quality brand that can be found everywhere. Avoid anything oil-based as they're not vagina-safe, and avoid silicone lubes unless you need them for water-play. (They can be very unpleasant to wash off, and aren't a great introductory lube for beginners.)

    If the condoms help, I'd still suggest using them - unless you've both been STD tested for all of the basics (herpes, chlamydia, gonorrhea, HIV, syphilis, etc) and have seen each other's results, there's still a risk. Many people are asymptomatic but still have STIs they can pass on to their partners unknowingly, and not using condoms increases the risk. If you do want to use them, what I would suggest is getting some lubricated ones and masturbating with them to get yourself used to the sensation. It helps many men grow accustomed to having sex with a condom on.
     
  12. grissom_pt

    grissom_pt New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Thks stefanie. I bought this one: Play Feel

    We'll definitely try that. I'm kindda sad that we have to use anything external to our bodies (except for the condom, maybe), but if that's what it takes, it could be a lot worse.

    I have just another question (I don't want to be wondering at the time of the action xP): should I "grease" my whole penis with the lube? Or put some in her vagina? Or both? Which is the best way to use it?
     
    #12 grissom_pt, Feb 11, 2011
    Last edited: Feb 11, 2011
  13. dukefan

    dukefan New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2011
    Messages:
    309
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    nc
    Use the lube on both, and pour in your hand first. For some reason the liquid in the bottle is always twenty degrees cooler. And if you do have any tearing in the foreskin let it heal completely because it is real easy to redo those small tears.


    Good luck and relax and take your time. A little extra lube never hurt anyone either so don't stress over that
     
  14. grissom_pt

    grissom_pt New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    I don't have any tears. It was just some distention.

    Thks a whole lot in advance. I feel a lot more confident now.
     
  15. Stefanie

    Stefanie New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2011
    Messages:
    77
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    VA
    I don't have any experience with that one, but considering the #2 ingredient is propylene glycol, if it irritates either of you, immediately discontinue using it. It may not, and if it doesn't, don't worry about it - just enjoy. :)

    Adding lube isn't a bad thing, though, so don't worry about it. It's a sexual enhancer that's to make sex more pleasurable for both of you, just like some sexy lingerie or lighting a few candles. If you are worried about it not being fun, MAKE it fun! You can set the lube bottle in a warm glass of water to warm it up to body temperature (or just use your hands like Dukefan said), slather it on your fingers, and tease her clitoris and vagina with it before putting some on you.
     
  16. grissom_pt

    grissom_pt New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 17, 2006
    Messages:
    33
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    That actually sounds fun.
     
  17. Trond

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2009
    Messages:
    1,665
    Likes Received:
    387
    Gender:
    Male
    It sometimes hurts a bit for me as well. Often we have done a lot of foreplay and oral sex, but I still find that she is a bit dry deep inside. I believe this is what can cause some discomfort in my case at least.
     
  18. cbrmale

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 26, 2006
    Messages:
    3,493
    Likes Received:
    291
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canberra
    I always use lube because of my girth, as sex almost always hurts me on initial penetration regardless of how well aroused my partner is. We always have natural sex, and it's no big deal to apply a little lube to aid that initial penetration. I've found that once I'm inside she gets wetter and wetter, so I don't apply much lube, just enough to make it possible without pain.
     
  19. liam_680

    liam_680 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 11, 2011
    Messages:
    9
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    try using lubrication to make it easier to penetrate and only insert it when your organ is fully erected
     
  20. MyIcarus

    MyIcarus New Member

    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2010
    Messages:
    58
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Ohio, USA
    Love it! May I snatch that phrase from ya?