interesting fact and very true

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by justaniceguy, Mar 30, 2012.

  1. justaniceguy

    justaniceguy Member

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    My wife and I nearly split up over a year ago caus I was a stupid idiot....But having said this maybe not!!!!!Anyway my wife and I always had good sex, but towards nearly splitting up our sex life was going down and also I knew in the back of my mind she still had feelings for her ex husband and I knew this for some time.....tho never aproach her about it...anyway, I used to behind my wifes back watch porn and chat to woman online,,,,,wow I here you say thats cheating, but nothing happened never met any woman etc.....But man did I feel guilty and I just wanted to tell her what I had been doing.....The guilt I was carrying...Some guys wouldnt care about that but I did....In the end I broke down and told her everything, told her that she still had feelings for her ex and that I was looking at porn and chatting to woman online talking sex etc......YES I HEAR YOU SAY LADIES!!...that terrable.....Anyway I said that our sex life has gone down hill and we seem to be drifting, and also I knew she still had feelings for her ex, she would not admit it....Anyway I said I was not happy but she was not true to me because she must have felt the same....Anyway I said to her she needs to see her ex cause I know she still had that feeling and knew all her family liked him and know they used to say they were like soul mates but he used to see woman physically behind her back....So anyway she went to see him and yes the inevitable happened she slept with him and started seeing him for about a month, when I realised what had happened and what a fool I was and knew deep down I loved her I wanted her to come back to me but only if she loved me properly and not him.....She said that she was not sure on whom she loved...I gave her an altimatum, me or him, it took her ages to think about it and because we are still living together it was driving me into the ground until one day I let rip and done a proud man thing......Sent a txt to him saying do you realise that my wife may love me and is in turmoil of not knowing who she wants to be with and do you really want this kinda hassle.....He ended up saying all these things to her again like oh I love you and ive always have your my soul mate etc........In the end he ditch her then she came to me....I posed the question, did she come back to me because he didnt want her or did she realise that she did love me and that it made her realise that he had not changed and therefore got this /her ex now totally out of her system........WHAT DO YOU THINK.....Also I GOT THIS OUTA MY SYSTEM,....I always wanted to go to a swinger club as I were facsinated by it and of coarse when my wife was seeing her ex it made me feel like what the hell she can do it , then I can, I went to the swinger club on my own and you know what........I walked out after knowing I could have had a couple of woman there.........I left realising something.......My pride, realisation of it all.......I know I come on here and place things what im thinking like threesomes etc, but im not chatting to pple, im meerly telling what I think and really being inquisitive.....Fantasies, thats the differance ive realised, and not to act them out because it will go wrong......Luckily for me im still with my wife and I love her more than ever and I know she loves me, sex is brilliant again now.......this is a true story and I wanted to share it with you all, Hope it has not bored you, it must not have done or you would not have read the end of this...lol............................thanks for reading
     
  2. pbs

    pbs
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    justaniceguy,

    If your wife has no more unfinished emotional business with her ex, I'd suggest forgetting it if you can, forgive if necessary, and focus on loving each other.
     
  3. justaniceguy

    justaniceguy Member

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    yes its made us stronger, kinda like a reality check......I think when you have been together for a long time, you tend to forget without realising you start taking each other for granted and then slowly dip into a kinda rut, then pow it hits yer.......thanks for reading my blog,
     
  4. pbs

    pbs
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    IMhO, you've hit on one of the most important aspects of building a successful long term relationship. When my wife and I married, we made each other 2 promises. We would never make love to another, and we would never take each other for granted. Before we met, each of us was torn from our partners by one of these events. Your marriage has survived both :rose
     
  5. mikeh

    mikeh New Member

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    You're a better man than me. Now just move on and don't ever bring it up with her again.
     
  6. SunshineDaydream

    SunshineDaydream New Member

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    Hope things is working out better for you. Relationships are tricky sometimes.
     
  7. China

    China New Member

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    I'm happy you and your wife resolved things for you both. However I don't see any "fact", just what worked for you.