I'm terrible at sex

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Yazz_Flute, Dec 1, 2010.

  1. Yazz_Flute

    Yazz_Flute New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2010
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Ok so I recently found out I'm terrible at sex, it would be cool if anyone could give advice so that next time isn't such a disaster :p
    for example, I normally don't have a problem staying hard when fooling around or when i'm masturbating, but when we had tried having sex with me on top I'd go limp after 20 seconds are so. We tried again with her on top and I was fine.
    and I found missionary position to be just horribly uncomfortable, I couldn't properly get any movement going and I just felt tired and exhausted right away.
    and in the end I didn't cum, I didn't even feel close. Maybe the condom was too small or maybe it was nerves? But I don't think I even felt that nervous, it was pretty relaxed.

    And advice for next time would be much appreciated :D
     
  2. Alwayslearningsex

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 29, 2010
    Messages:
    2,247
    Likes Received:
    787
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Canada
    I have a few ideas. Try different condom size, I agree too tight is not good. Try on top pulling your knees up sort of by her hips / waist.
    This is comfortable to me and allow good deep pushes.
    Have her grab your shaft as you go inside to arouse you, stroking at the same time you penetrate, later on she can remove her hand.
    Try other positions, play with each other and enjoy.
     
  3. htoad

    htoad Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2010
    Messages:
    456
    Likes Received:
    49
    Gender:
    Male
    Good sex starts with good health. What kind of physical shape are you in?
     
  4. igor

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2006
    Messages:
    4,110
    Likes Received:
    163
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Chicago area
    I don't see the relationship between this and condom size. I think something else is the problem.
     
  5. HardRocker

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Sep 24, 2006
    Messages:
    5,719
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Male
    That was my first thought. Plus, what about cigarettes, alcohol, dope, drugs? Any one of those could be a real problem with sex. A combination is worse.
     
  6. Yazz_Flute

    Yazz_Flute New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2010
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Cheers for the feedback guys.

    I'm in decent physical health, I go to the gym a fair bit and I'm not overweight or anything. But I do smoke and I don't jog or run, so maybe doing this could help?

    Any idea what 'something' else could be?

    hmm I smoke, and maybe I'd had like one beer, but no drugs or dope.
     
  7. igor

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 13, 2006
    Messages:
    4,110
    Likes Received:
    163
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Chicago area
    Well this is a puzzle to me. I never heard of anyone having trouble with this position. Of course there are variations of it - I wonder exactly how you tried this one.
     
  8. Silverback

    Silverback Member

    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2010
    Messages:
    104
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    NW England
    Don't lye on top when doing missionary, try sort of kneeling down in front of her, you can get some really deep thrusts going and is a lot more comfortable
     
  9. Yazz_Flute

    Yazz_Flute New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2010
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    ahhh makes sense, I'll keep this in mind!
     
  10. samcore

    samcore New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Messages:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Though sexual intercourse generally involves the sexual penetration of the body of one person by another, or the stimulation of the sex organ of one by another, a sex position may not necessarily involve penetration or direct stimulation. *link deleted*
     
    #10 samcore, Dec 3, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 3, 2010
  11. htoad

    htoad Active Member

    Joined:
    Apr 23, 2010
    Messages:
    456
    Likes Received:
    49
    Gender:
    Male
    Smoking and no jogging/running might mean your cardiovascular system is not up to par, and you lack stamina, and may be why you get exhausted. Do you do cardio exercises at the gym? I know lots of guys who go but just lift weights, which is not going to help your stamina and blood flow.
     
  12. Yazz_Flute

    Yazz_Flute New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2010
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Yeah I probably fit into the category of people that just lift weights, guess I'll have to get started on jogging regularly.
     
  13. sinner

    sinner New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2010
    Messages:
    940
    Likes Received:
    9
    Gender:
    Female
    I'm going to add my two cents. If you are having erection problems see a doctor. For everything else, the key to good sex IMHO is relaxation. It is a very natural act and will come naturally. There are awkward moments for sure. Just hang out with your partner. It is more important to share time with youir partner than to "achieve" orgasm. My best sex has been when we were just enjoying being together. Try to plan "not" having sex and see what happens. Rent a movie. Hold each other tight kiss massage each other and then sEe what happens.
     
  14. besttoolsinbed

    besttoolsinbed New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2010
    Messages:
    2
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Hey man, clearly the whole "terrible at sex" thing has gotten into your head (no pun intended). From personal experience I would suggest concentrating more on her and getting her to reach her orgasm via foreplay. This accomplishes a few things: 1. You are able to get your mind off of you and onto stimulating her. 2. The act of foreplay and getting her extremely aroused can in return get you excited enough to go forward with sex with the right state of mind. and 3. I find getting her to orgasm in general improves the mood of both partners dramatically.

    I agree with the posts above about personal health but for a different reason. I find that the better I feel about myself physically the more I enjoy sex and thus the more easily I am aroused.

    This is just my opinion I hope it is insightful.

    If you need advice on how to get her to orgasm I have a brief article on it at <link to advertisement removed> Best of luck keep us posted!
     
    #14 besttoolsinbed, Dec 8, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: Dec 8, 2010