I'm sad

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Maverick, Sep 4, 2011.

  1. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    I just went to my old myspace profile, and read through all my old blogs. Mind you, I got on myspace right after I got divorced, and it hurts reading the shit I posted. I wish I had had some friends back then who cared more, or family. I get tired of being the loner, I really do.

    I read back all the old messages I sent or received, and realize I could have had some of the beautiful women I was talking to, but I was so hung up on my ex, I couldn't let go. I still have the message from a few top pornstars who want to be with me, back in the day, but I blew it off because I was so caugh up on my ex.

    I shouldn't have looked at myspace again, because I know it has a lot of bad memories, but I'm a glutton for punishment, and I read a few of my blogs I posted. I have to say this: Why didn't anyone intervene to help me? I was the person everyone turned to for help, but when I needed it, no one was there.

    I'm a better person for everything, but I also admit I have an arrogance that I am better then most because I have made it in life with all the setbacks, farther then most twice my age, and for that, I feel proud. However, I know I'm proud, not arrogant. Or at least, I try not to be arrogant.

    So, looking back, I was a sad loner, who gave everything to help others, with no thought of receiving any benefit from his actions. I still don't expect any benefits, but I'm refusing to be a loner anymore. I will go from here, a better man then any you have ever seen. I will conquer what I will, discard what I don't want, and be a forgiving person.

    I post this not for sorrow or sympathy, but for realization, that I have changed. I am a man. I shed the cloak of childish notions. I know my strengths, and I know my weaknesses. I will embrace them, and I refuse to run from them. To those who hope to see me fall, fuck you and get in line, cuz I won't fall. There's a long line of people who think I should be in a card board box, but I REFUSE to go there. I won't quit, and you can all watch, and follow me.
     
  2. Maverick

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    The shitty thing of my life??? I usually work nights, so I'm a hardcore night owl, and most, if not all my friends who I trust sleep at night, so if I need someone to talk to, I have no one, but everyone doesn't mind calling me at 6 am to ask questions about whats up with their life. Guess it's my calling. ;)
     
  3. hornyscot

    hornyscot New Member

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    hello douchebag, been there, seen it, wrote the book and got the t shirt as they say, you might not mean to but you sound so bitter and that in itself shall drag you down, dont let it, dont forget your past ( it will serve you well) but dont keep revising it. never look down on any one, you are above no one, below no one and everyones equal. and yes continue to do what you do best, be caring, have time for friends and those who need you, its what makes you who you are and yes a better man foi it. good luck
     
  4. Mittimer

    Gold Member

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    You know my number, babe. I'm often up late hours.
     
  5. luvbug

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    You have my number too *wink*
     
  6. RideNaked2

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    I'm usually up late into the night as well, T works nights also so I tend to "mirror" his sleeping hours :)
    If I'm not up...I would wake up to chat with you! :)
     
  7. Maverick

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    :) We'll see how tonight goes
     
  8. Ready2Please

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    I'm usually up late too but I guess you need my number for that. :)
     
  9. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    LOL.......it's all good. Though sometimes talking to perfect strangers is a good way of getting some good feedback.
     
  10. Maverick

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    I'm young, but I've been to just about every extreme possible already. LOL. Thanks for the words of advice. And go Braveheart. ;)
     
  11. Maverick

    Maverick Member

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    Well, that's a nice gesture, and thank you.
     
  12. luvbug

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    We already talked.. *wink*
    You know my numbers.....call anytime.