Im in a tough boat..

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Nerveno, Jul 29, 2007.

  1. Nerveno

    Nerveno New Member

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    Hey guys,

    I know there are threads on 3sums and I've read most of them and most of suitations seem to be the same as mine, basically I got off when myt girlfriend talks about having sex with another man, but when I think about it happening I get really defensive and have said I couldn't do it... on the other hand she says she wants to because she wants to have 2 guys, but she says she's fine with me having sex with another woman.. seems like a dream come true but it isn't because Im afraid that she will end up calling me selfish etc. plus thats not fair which I have said.

    What do I do? Do I give mfm a try and risk going for him or just leave it and tell her no and tell her no to 3somes as well?
     
  2. Cobia

    Cobia New Member

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    It really depends on what YOU want.
     
  3. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Nerveno, No one can give you an answer
    to your problem as its to complex and we don't really
    know how you feel.
    just speaking for myself and not being the least bit the jealous person
    I would open up and tell her OK as long as she is not just wanting
    have sex with someone that She has fell for.
    Sit down with Her and discuss it fully bringing up all the
    options, a MFM, FMF, Swinging lifestyle, Or just one on one
    with different people.
    And by all means only have sex with people that you can both fully
    agree on. Total strangers are ideal, Good friends is trouble.
    This could be fun for you if you are open minded and do not
    have strong jealousies.
    I have been their and done that and definitely enjoyed every minute of it.

    Hiker
     
  4. Joe

    Joe
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    That is a tough situation. I think you've got to do what YOU think is right. Some on this board would probably jump at a 3some like that, but that has little to do with your own feelings.

    I couldn't handle a MMF scenario myself, and if my gf (or wife) insisted on it, she wouldn't be my gf for long. I'd simply not be a part of it. Talk about it, think about it, talk about it some more if you like, then make YOUR decision. If the gf doesn't like your decision, she can then make her own.
     
  5. Buffalo204

    Buffalo204 Member

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    If your not secure enough to except a man in the relationship you would be smart to keep the ladies out also.
     
  6. buddy0975

    buddy0975 Member

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    Am I the only one who thinks we're getting hit by spam bots? Notice the links in all these recent newbie 1-posters that lead to outside sites. I just find it all weird is all.
     
  7. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    SPAM posts are removed, as soon as a Moderator finds it. Please use the "Report Post" option (the pink triangle with a black line in the middle), rather than referring to it in a thread.
    ----------------------------------------------------------

    ON TOPIC: Any 3-some or swinging should be a mutual decision of the couple. If either party has reservations, the idea should be shelved. PERIOD! Going ahead with it, just to appease will certainly spell disaster in the relationship.
     
  8. yorkiesmurf

    yorkiesmurf New Member

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    First having had a threesome there is a big difference between the fantasy of having a threesome and the reality of having one. It sounds as though you are confronting the reality of a having a threesome and realizing that there is more to it that than just sex.

    The fact that she says that she is okay :eek waves a red flag to me :eek:utahere. I am wondering if she is saying this because she is wanting to end the relationship or that there is touble in the relationship? Another question have the two of you discussed having an open relationship? Maybe I am reading more into the post than that is meant but I am wondering if she is not wanting to have one?

    Personally I would not have sex with another woman until I clarified what she meant: relationship in trouble or open relationship.
     
  9. Buffalo204

    Buffalo204 Member

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    I was thinking. I know you care for this girl but she may not be the one for you. It sounds like she still wants to be adventurous and try some things that you are just not ready/willing to try. No shame in that, not everyone likes coffee either. What I'm saying is she might not be the one for you. I know we sometimes feel like he/she is the "Only one for me!" but there is another "only one" coming down the road. How important is this to her and how strong do you feel? Give it some thought.