I think I messed up badly. Need some advice please!

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by johnny1234, Jan 13, 2007.

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  1. johnny1234

    johnny1234 New Member

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    I'm really freaking out right now. My girlfriend and i are both virgins and basically just had sex for the first time. I say basically because we didn't really get to the "sex" part, I was just trying to fully insert myself first, but that's as far as we got.

    I gradually worked about half of my penis inside. Once we got to that point I pulled out and we talked for a couple minutes to make sure she wanted to continue.

    The reason I am worried is after we were done talking and I tried to reinsert myself, I realized that I was going soft, and I couldn't get it to go back up.

    While I was inside i did not even feel like I was close to comming, but i am just really worried because I can't think of any reason why i would go soft so quickly other than if i ejaculated inside of her, which would be very bad because i wasn't wearing a condom.

    I may be a virgin but I have masturbated enough to know when I am about to come, and I am pretty sure it would be hard for me to not notice it, but i am still really worried that somehow I was just caught up in the heat of the moment and didnt notice. Can anyone tell me from experience if it is possible to ejaculate and not notice?
     
  2. cbrmale

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    If you come inside a vagina, a lot of the come dribbles out and makes quite a mess, so it is unlikely you'd miss it on reinsertion.

    Almost certainly trying to talk a doubtful partner into having sex is a bit of a mood destroyer if ever there was one! After the discussion, you may have subconciously felt she was still not quite ready, and your subconcious brain overtook your concious desire. It happens, even to married couples when your wife says 'yes' but you sense she isn't in the mood. Or if you agree to do something new and a little kinky, but you sense she really isn't into it.

    One way to do it is to discuss how far you want to go and how you want to get there before getting into the bedroom, and then there is no ambiguity as to what follows, and therefore your mind and penis will both be in the same place.
     
  3. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    Your emotions likely caused the loss of erection, rather than an ejaculation. So, I do not think that you need to worry that you came inside of her. However, (and here goes the smartass again)...... please tell me why on earth you put your cock inside of her without a condom on in the first place?! Please. Were you "intending" to pull out before you came? Interesting, since now you acknowledge that you could have cum without pulling out, that (gasp) you might not have as much control over your ejaculation as you thought you did. I am NOT trying to be condescending, I assure you. Learn from this right this very minute, and if you do not want to be a parent yet, take MATURE and RESPONSIBLE precautions to prevent it. Sex is an adult act, behave as an adult.
     
  4. NaughtyKnickers

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    Mel is right, dead on.
    Wearing a condom is a small price to pay for not having to be scared S#$@less about being pregnant at a bad time... Let alone actually getting pregnant... OR contracting something. :ugh
    Not trying to be overly critical of you here, just looking out for ya ;)

    And don't stress too much about the loss of erection thing. Sometimes our bodies go against our will. It's embarassing and frustrating, but happens to everyone, even those of us who have been having sex for a while.
    Cbrmale and Melicious both have given sound advice about where to go from here..

    Best wishes! :)
     
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