i need to poop

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by starberry, Nov 12, 2007.

  1. starberry

    starberry New Member

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    I know this is so gross but I am so desperate.
    The low down is I dont get paid until tommorow and I am flat broke, and I am sososososo constipated, ewww I know. I cant buy anything, what around the house can I do to GET THIS OUT??!!
    My boyfriend suggested caffiene so I'm trying that now but any other suggestion? Eat a certain something along those lines. Reply quick!
     
  2. Barbwire

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    What? What? WHAT?! Why are you asking us? Isn't there a constipation forum somewhere? :ugh
     
  3. slamd097

    slamd097 New Member

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    Um...Bran, grapes, peanuts, and get creative and make your self an enema. Ok, that last one is extreme measures...but um...yeah..Im out..
     
  4. dwj21

    dwj21 New Member

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    brew some coffee, let it cool to a lukewarm temp. then use it as an enema. not only is it good for you it will take care of your problem too!!!
     
  5. AnonymousOne

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    This is one of the strangest Lounge threads I have ever seen.
     
  6. Hot Wheels

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    If you really are..sosososo constipated...and need relief "right now"...then an enema sounds like the way to go......;)


    Did you hear the one about the constipated mathematician?

    He worked it out with a pencil:D

    Opps...sorry...I couldnt help myself...:eek:utahere
     
  7. Thorn

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    12 CLs usually does it for me the next morning.

    Note: CLs = Coors Lights
     
  8. cook74

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    :lol

    Eat 1/2 a kilo of honey, that should get you moving :dgrin
     
  9. Halogen

    Halogen New Member

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    I wouldn't necessarily put coffee up my butt..but I would drink it for constipation. That will get it moving!

    ETA: Red wine too!
     
  10. dwj21

    dwj21 New Member

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    coffee enemas are a good way to really cleanse the colon and help detox the body. it is a method used in alternative medicines.
     
  11. heelfetish

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    Never heard of it. But during my 3 trips to the hospital for my tonsillitis, I always ended up with constipation victims around me. Some stool softeners and enemas were the doctor's orders, and it worked like a charm each time.

    Those people were in serious agony, I hope I never have to go through that. :ugh
     
  12. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    Ever heard of Activa Yogurt? Made by Dannon, it claims to relieve many lower abdominal malfunctions, if you eat one small 4-ounce container a day. I took the challenge, and IT WORKS!!!

    From bloating to lack of "elimination" for several days at a time, I used to pop every pill they put on the market. Activa doesn't cause any painful side effects, but the live cultures (L.bulgaricus,S.thermophilus and Bifidobacterium - - :shrug) just make everything down there work like it should. Doesn't cause flatulence (that's farts, for all you guys out there :lol ), nor does it cause diarreah. You just kinda get normal!!

    Try it!
     
  13. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Halogen said
    That will do it , Tomorrow.
    But she is broke and can't buy any.

    So what to do, I have been their,
    and I ate a little uncooked greens or just grass.
    that should so it.
    But anyway you probably have it solved by now.

    Hiker
     
  14. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

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    How do you put coffee up your bum on your own?!
    Isn't it meant to be done at spas, and doctors. lol
     
  15. AnonymousOne

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    This is SO going in the memorable quotes thread....
     
  16. Dreama

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    Well, try drinking some warm water....It's always helped me.
     
  17. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    This thread was originally posted five days ago. Let's hope she was able to resolve the situation satisfactorily.