I need an Alpha

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Well_Heeled_RN, Apr 25, 2013.

  1. Well_Heeled_RN

    Well_Heeled_RN New Member

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    My current man is really great, but, I need an Alpha. How do I approach the subject without making my man insecure.
    I want bossy and rough...how do I ask for that without insulting him?
    I have left erotic novels laying around open on certain pages, hoping he would read them and try something out. Help me.
     
  2. Mittimer

    Gold Member

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    The best way to let him know this is what you want is to actually let him know it's what you want. Unfortunately, men aren't mind readers. I doubt that you will make him insecure by telling him that you want something sexually.

    By nature most men don't outwardly try to be bossy and rough or overly dominant sexually. I know that my guy was actually SCARED to do so in the beginning. It takes a good day and the right mood for him to really open up to it.

    Just sit down and have a good, calm and open discussion with him. As him if there's anything that he would also like from you since you're asking something from him. :)
     
  3. kipro150

    kipro150 Member

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    lol. stuff like an open book on a certain page doesnt work on guys. I'd just be like "why'd she leave it open like that, shes going to lose her place"

    Honestly, I'd advise just telling him straight on. Don't say it like "i think youre a wuss and need to toughen up". If you have some dirty talk and tell him how you want him to dominate you he'll hopefully get the message.

    edit: btw, dont say the sentence you put in your topic lol. THATD make him feel insecure
     
  4. Well_Heeled_RN

    Well_Heeled_RN New Member

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    Yeah, I knew the open book was kind of lame.
     
  5. Meee

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    Welcome to the site.

    I can't imagine a man taking a hint like that. But since you've already found books that include the message you want to send, how about if you and your man read them together? It will open up opportunities for discussion.
     
  6. Succubus

    Succubus New Member

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  7. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    I need guys who will be dominated. The "dominant man" thing is just old to me, and not hot.
     
  8. mrcock

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    I am actually proud of you. now that you know what do you want, you can explore more in that direction

    nice start
     
  9. kipro150

    kipro150 Member

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    It doesnt have to be one or the other. Its fun to do both. cept i do like dominating more often for some reason.
     
  10. fireontheside

    fireontheside Member

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    For you, maybe. For me, a man dominating is not fun at all and a huge turnoff.
     
  11. MordsithLove

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    I like to switch it up from time to time. :)
     
  12. Grantjl87

    Grantjl87 New Member

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    You seem like a sweet person. I'm actually think leaving the novel out was a good idea. Honestly if my girlfriend left a novel out like that, and I read it, I would definitely ask her if this is the type of stuff she likes. Maybe you shouldn't just come out and say it because you are already afraid of making him feel insecure, which will increase the chances of it comming out wrong when you try to say it. I would continue the hints, maybe even watch some porn where the women are being manhandeled, and hopefully he asks you if that's what you like. Then you can be like "Helll yeeahhh!" Lol. Thanks for posting, good luck
     
  13. redics_girl

    redics_girl Active Member

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    lots of communication.... and lots of patience. especially if its a role he's not entirely comfortable with. but if he's open to it, the patience will pay off, because when he really gets into it.... look out!
     
  14. dougsan

    dougsan New Member

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    My wife and I are avid readers. We both read via Kindles andold fashioned books. There are books lieing open in almost every room in our house. I will not touch books she leaves open because she will forget which page she was on if I scew things up (drop it, close it by mistake, etc. If my wife is trying to tell me something the book idea will not work. We would talk about whatever ....