I just want my friend for sex.

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Ghost Man, Nov 13, 2009.

  1. Ghost Man

    Ghost Man New Member

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    I just got out of a long relationship with my Ex.
    I'm at the point where I don't want to date but casually date.
    I work with a lot of people my age and younger.
    I just met a female friend about 2 weeks ago and I think she either likes me or has a crush on me.
    We were texting one night and i told her how I did not go out with my buddies and I ended up staying. She said I should of asked her and she would of gone. So I know at this point that I can ask her to hang out with me and she will go. So I made it sound like no big deal and so I invited her to hang out. We went to a grab pie and watch a movie. I have never hung out with her just the two of us. In fact the first and last time we hung was with other friends.
    Anyways, we walked a lot and I made her laugh and she got close to me. After the night I took her home and she gave me a hug like any other friend would do.
    On the way home I did not want to say that "we should do this again" cuz I don't want her to think that I want to date her. But I think I have messed up by now and I don't know how point it out that I would like to sleep with her but not as BF/GF thing.
    What can I ask her so that I can lead her to the different direction?
    We are young, she is 20 and I am 22.
    I have slept with 4 girls. 3 were past Gf and one was a fling that the girl started.
    I hope I don't get bashed for this.
     
  2. Dreama

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    Well, I think that if you're going to have a FWB type of thing, you actually have to be her friend-and respect her enough to talk to her about what you think. I also wouldn't dump her as a friend if that is not what she would like to do. If you do this, it makes you seem shallower than shallow. Just get comfortable with her, talk to her, and as I said, be her friend. And definitely express how you feel on this issue. mention you're not ready for anything serious-and see how she reacts. Take it slow!
     
  3. Ghost Man

    Ghost Man New Member

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    I don't plan to dump her as a friend.
    I just don't know what questions sounds right to lead her into the direction I am looking for.
    Last thing I need is for her to just slap me across the face because I straight out told her that I just want to undress her right there.
    I was thinking about talking naughty to her as friends. Friends can talk like that, right?
     
  4. Barbwire

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    My advice follows Dreamas but I want to add, don't play games. "Just talking naughty" without telling her your ultimate intentions may lead to confusion, second guessing and missed opportunities. Tell her, with as much charm and grace as you can muster, you would like to bone her without any strings attached.

    If she slaps you in the face, at least you will have an interesting story to come here and tell us. If she agrees, you are still required to come here and tell us about the sex, you know that, right? Oh, and if she laughs in your face, you have to supply video along with your story, OK? :dgrin
     
  5. Ghost Man

    Ghost Man New Member

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    I think I can hang out with you already. haha. I wish it was easy to tell her straight out about the "bone her" part word for word. I know I am not ugly looking nor a model from heaven. But I do get a feeling that girls won't pass me cuz some moms will still pay me to date their daughter. :p But anyways, I just want to sound smooth and wondering in what way would you want to hear me drop the verse on her?
    Can someone give me a line to give her? Something to start me off so I won't phuck it up.
     
  6. Stormin10

    Stormin10 Member

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    You're not selling a car mate... so cheesy lines wont work and besides, if she smells a "playa" you're sunk too.
    Be up front and honest with her.. using her or deceiving your way into her pants with BS lines is nasty.
     
  7. Ghost Man

    Ghost Man New Member

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    Well that is what I am trying to avoid, BS lines.

    How would anyone else would like to here this direction?
    I don't want it to come out wrong and me saying, "Hey, I just want to bone you".
    Instead maybe something like, "what if I told you that....".
     
  8. Stormin10

    Stormin10 Member

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    Well if she is genuinely your friend treat her with respect, do you have feelings for her or is it just lust?
    Maybe the FWB idea aint so smart unless there's obvious chemistry from her.... you risk loosing a friend if you push it, and if you try to pants her under false pretenses and she has feelings for you you'll look like a dog...
     
  9. Ghost Man

    Ghost Man New Member

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    I'm sure its just lust. When ever I think about her all it is is wondering if she is good in bed.
    I'm trying to be careful in not getting her to attached to me. Its like I said, when I told her that my buddies ditch me for a flick, she insisted on asking her instead. I just met her like 2 weeks ago and we started texting like 1 week ago. I don't know what that says whether she is thinking the same thing or actually wanting to have a relationship?
    When we text, its nothing about getting to know eachother with questions, but I just make her laugh cuz its what I do. I like to be funny but still have that sex appeal on me.
    The only weird thing is that she does not text me, she waits for me to text her. But at the same time, I know she likes it when peeps text her.
     
  10. sinfinity

    sinfinity New Member

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    Why don't you just go ahead and tell her straight out, gosh. Give the girl some credit.
     
  11. Nomad88

    Nomad88 New Member

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    Just be blunt. Tell her her she's neat but before you get closer and possibly raise expectations, you want to tell her what it is you want from her. Two possible outcomes:One-rejection. Two-sex. *Shrug* You're young, too...give it a go. Why not!
     
  12. sinfinity

    sinfinity New Member

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    Exactly. Nomad's got the right of it.

    "Can't help it if it's true.. don't wanna be your man... I just want to play with you, play with you, play with you-oo." - Of Montreal Id Engager
     
  13. Ghost Man

    Ghost Man New Member

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    Thanks you guys. I like the responses. We might hang out this week. We spend about almost 2hrs texting last nite. I just wanted to make her laugh. But this time she text me 1st.
     
  14. Barbwire

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    OK, so you've only known this girl for 2 weeks and the title of your thread is "I just want my friend for sex." It seems to me you've hardly had time to form a friendship and at this point you two are aquaintances, but that's it.

    If I were in a similar situation with a guy that I'd only known for 2 weeks and he told me he wanted to be fuck buddies, I'd slap the shit out of him. Making a move this early in the game will not only ruin your chances of fucking her, it could ruin your chance of being her friend.

    Hold off for a while longer and see what developes between the two of you. Patience, man patience.
     
  15. sinfinity

    sinfinity New Member

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    Yeah, maybe if he were wanting to date her. His main interest in her FWB, though. So wouldn't it be more honest to tell her what he wants from her, especially if she's in danger of getting emotionally invested? I think two weeks is a long enough time to become friends, personally.
     
  16. HardRocker

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    Two weeks is an awfully short time to figure out where any sort of relationship or friendship may be headed. Why don't you just be her friend for a while and enjoy each others company. You just came off of a long relationship anyway so you probably need more time to get your head together. If she's intelligent, she knows that too.

    Chill out and don't try to be Mr. Cool, you'll end up embarrassing yourself. Just go with the flow, she'll like the real you better... or not. That's the breaks.
     
  17. Ghost Man

    Ghost Man New Member

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    Well, she seems interested in me a lot and that is what I am afraid of. I don't want to keep hanging out with her and then she thinks that the BF/GF thing is coming along good.
    Plus, other guys are interfering with us and flirting with her. Aren't girls now and days more open to sex a lot sooner then what it use to be?
     
  18. HardRocker

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    Well what's so bad about that? Just tell her you don't want to commit to a relationship since you have not yet recovered from your recent breakup. She should understand that. You might just have to have sex with your hand for a while. That's not a catastrophe either. Use a little restraint; you have years of sex ahead of you. She could be The One for all you know.

    I don't think so. When I was in HS and college everybody was fucking everybody else all the fucking time. You couldn't throw a stick without hitting someone who wasn't on the way to or on the way from having sex.
     
  19. Stormin10

    Stormin10 Member

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    Agree 100%... 2 weeks is barely enough time to be acquaintances too...

    It all sounds very predatory...
     
  20. Stormin10

    Stormin10 Member

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    You make sex sound like going to the gym for a work out... Nearly every woman i know has feelings and emotions, most women i know dont like being used as a sex object and dont just "give it up" to who ever wants it.....