I am happily married but lately am turned on by watching women, WTD?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by mehappy, Jul 17, 2013.

  1. mehappy

    mehappy New Member

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    I am a happily married woman, almost ten years. My husband and I have a pretty good sex life.
    But something happened about half a year ago and I am a bit changed and dont know what to do.
    I was searching for something on youtube and a video or two women having sex came up (soft porn I guess it is called) and I could not look away. I was completely turned on. And now, every while, when I am home alone I actively look for things to watch so that I can properly get turned on like that and then go masturbate. I now look for stories with woman with women and watch something almost every other day.
    Now, I dont know how this board works, but I am not looking for advice like "well go tell your husband and see what he says" or "go have a fling". I am a religious woman and will not leave my marriage for something like this.
    So what do I do? Just continue to allow myself to watch things that make me terribly horny and then go help myself? Or do you think I should try and stop this at all costs?
    Anyone have any advice?
     
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  2. boobjob

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    If you are religious, then seek help from your spiritual advisor. Your marriage is the most important thing you have. Please protect it.
     
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  3. Hot Wheels

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    Mmmm.....I dont really know how much help your spiritual advisor would be given they are probably biased toward your religion and it's beliefs.....
    May I ask a question?
    When your having sex....are you thinking about other women or are you fixating on your husband?
     
    #3 Hot Wheels, Jul 17, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 17, 2013
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  4. Northside

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    Your beliefs are your own business. Personally I find it hard to believe that a creator would give us a powerful sex drive then expect us to suppress it. That's what the phony money grubbing preachers who get caught having affairs try to tell us. If you are excited watching two beautiful women enjoy the gifts God has given them, how can it be wrong? Who are you hurting?
     
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  5. ply

    ply
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    Is this something you can broach with your hubby? Maybe a 3 some?
     
  6. suzy7

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    Hi, Ply has good idea, but! !
    You need to be sure its OK with hubby.
    If I were you, I would just talk with your girl friends,
    maybe one of them has the same feelings or better yet knows someone, girl with girl
    is awesome, sometime you should really try it.
    Good luck, xx
     
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  7. boobjob

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    It appears from the original post that it would hurt her husband since she doesn't want to tell him. You started saying that her beliefs are her business but then said they are wrong. And... You don't even know what she believes. Can we please have some respect for OP in trying to answer the question?
     
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  8. boobjob

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    Of course her spiritual advisor will be biased towards her religion. What's wrong with that? OP's religion is important enough that she included it in the question. Is a spiritual advisor any less biased than a bunch of strangers who spend their time talking about sex.

    Your question to OP, however, is a good one. It might even be a question that her spiritual advisor would ask.
     
  9. luvbug

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    So your husband doesn't know you get turned on by watching two women have sex? Why not tell him? What would he say? Maybe it will excite him . Maybe he will want to watch it with you .
    If you don't want to tell him then don't. If you want to keep watching it and getting yourself off then do it. I don't see how it's hurting anyone.
     
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  10. Meee

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    I agree, I don't see a problem here. Many married people have fantasies and masturbate. You can still have your private time and still have a good sexual relationship with your husband when he's home.
     
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  11. boobjob

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    And the ladies nail it once again. Great answers
     
  12. almostthere

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    I say let him know. Your husband should be your best friend. Who knows maybe you guys can experiment with another woman. Or just have sex with girl on girl videos playing. I fantasize about my wife in a three way,mwm.
    i would never do it but i too masturbate to mwm vids. If during a vid i picture the w my wife,im done. Nothing wrong with fantasy.
     
  13. sandwich

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    I wish I could remember where I read this so I could provide a link, but I read not too long ago that it is very common for heterosexual women to be attracted to lesbian porn and be turned on in that context. These women have no interest in relationships with other women and do not find women in "real life" to be attractive sexually. It's just a porn thing.

    I'm kinda addicted to watching cocks pound in and out of girls' asses in a very rough manner (rougher than I could handle) and while I could let that bother me, I just chalk it up to the draw of porn.

    If you are fantasizing about someone you know or have seen in person, well then that's a different story.

    You probably have female heterosexual friends who also fantasize about women.
     
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  14. mehappy

    mehappy New Member

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    I can not ask a spiritual adviser. I hardly ask religious advisers anything, I am not going to ask this. I am way too embarrassed. I know that that is not a good reason, but its a no go.
     
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  15. mehappy

    mehappy New Member

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    I sometimes think of my husband and other times of women. I KNOW that that is a problem.
     
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  16. mehappy

    mehappy New Member

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    Um, no, not at all. It is completely against my religion to not be completely faithful once someone is married. I would also not find a threesome to be that nice either.
    I get turned on with my husband OR watching two women, not all of that together.
     
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  17. mehappy

    mehappy New Member

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    Again, not something that I could do. All of my friends are other religious married women. This is not something that one talks about, at all. I guess I will have to find some sort of support group on line.
     
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  18. Northside

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    No Boobjob I did not say her beliefs are wrong! As you should have read, I said, '"I find it hard to believe that a Creator would give us a powerful sex drive then expect us to suppress it." Then I went on to express the fact that those who tell us how we should act sometimes don't practice what they preach. I merely expressed my opinions and the facts that support them. I didn't say her beliefs were wrong. They are based on "faith." My definition of faith is believing something even though there is no supporting facts or evidence.

    In a nutshell I guess I'm trying to say I don't understand why she should feel she feel guilty for what naturally turns her on. I don't like other people trying to tell me how to live or trying to force their interpretations of right and wrong on me. I just wanted to express another point of view.
     
    #18 Northside, Jul 19, 2013
    Last edited: Jul 19, 2013
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  19. Meee

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    What is the problem with it? Consider my comment again:

     
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  20. boobjob

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    It is only a problem if you never think of your husband. Different moods can add spice. If you are thinking about women its probably a good time to ask for cunninlingus and let your imagination run wild. You'll have a great orgasm and he'll think he was responsible. Everyone will be happy.
     
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