How to introduce improving sex to a man.

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Bryant31, Mar 5, 2010.

  1. Bryant31

    Bryant31 New Member

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    Its simple, ladies introduce it to him DURING the act of sex. He will be more than happy to change it up during sex to improve it. If he is not hitting that spot. Let him know during sex. Tell him, I like it this, or like that. TALK TO HIM! I guarantee he will listen. Take care.
     
  2. Barbwire

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    Re: How to intoduce improving sex to a man.

    This, I know BUT, sometimes, when I tell my husband "do this, do that" during the sex act it gets to the point where I feel like I'm talking to a wall. It seems that he doesn't focus on what I'm telling him because he's so into what he's doing. It's almost like once the blood leaves the brain and goes to the cock he can't comprehend what I'm telling him and/or he goes tempararily deaf.

    Sometimes, it's better to talk about your previous night's sex over a cup of coffee in the morning and discuss the things that you loved about it and the things you think could use some improvement. That way, you are sure that you have your partner's undivided attention.

     
  3. Barbwire

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    It's a shame that no one has piped in on this besides me. I think it would be great to hear how this situation if handled by other members.

    How does one tell their partner there is room from improvement in the bedroom?

    Let's discuss!
     
  4. Dreama

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    Usually, I try to bring it up in regular conversation. When we're doing it, I'm usually too focused to really care about the specifics of his motions-I'm easy to please. However, we do have issues with having a stagnant sex life-it's not that the sex is bad, or that he does the wrong things. It just gets boring. So, we both have to make an effort to try to do something different, and to make note of it before we get down to business.
     
  5. Soulspinner

    Soulspinner New Member

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    Along the same lines as Dreama, my wife and I discuss this in normal conversation. I always try to be honest and sensitive at the same time. She went through a phase where she would hum for short intervals while sucking my cock. This did nothing for me. Kinda made me laugh but it just distracted from the fun. I later ended up sharing that I loved hearing the slurping sounds when she gives me head. She was just taking a cue from a porn flick and thought it would turn me on. Likewise, I like to please her and want to make sure that I'm satisfying her, so I think it's very important to remain open and communicate about what feels good, what feels better and even what doesn't do anything at all.
     
  6. gman

    gman New Member

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    My wife and I communicate about slowing down or whatever were doing during sex. I think it makes for a better time if you can tell her what you like and I'm sure it would be the same for her.
     
  7. igor

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    I think it is often a good idea to express one's views during the sex act rather than wait until later. Desires and attitudes change from time to time and what you like next time may not be the same as what you like at that moment.
     
  8. Bowler

    Bowler New Member

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    In my opinion, there's no better way to teach a partner than to completely dominate them.
    Go slow, tell them exactly what to do, and punish them if they get it wrong.
    Or, depending on your partner, punishing them if they get it right can work better. ;)

    The learning potential from this kind of situation can be almost limitless, and is also very fun. :)
     
  9. igor

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    That approach will surely get you a lot of lasting friendships :ugh
     
  10. Bowler

    Bowler New Member

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    @Igor
    You'd probably be very surprised at how many people enjoy BDSM.
    Even if you don't.
     
  11. igor

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    OK - whatever floats your boat but your statement came across (to me) as something everyone should try all the time if you are not pleased.
     
  12. Bowler

    Bowler New Member

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    Oops, sorry for not making myself understood properly.
    No, only go down this route if your partner shares the same desire to as yourself.
     
  13. oldergentleman

    oldergentleman New Member

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    It's really very simple, TALK to each other. There is nothing better than honest communication. Sex is should be the best experience you have so why not discuss it.
     
  14. FlirtyChick

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    In my experience, I tell him what i really really like while he is doing it, ASK him gently during to move here, touch that, lick there.....and since I am loud when pleased, he knows. When I hear or see certain sounds or reactions from him I look at him and smile, or wink, and ask if he likes it or not. When it is all over I like to discuss the greats and goods and not so goods, but never in a condescending tone. Words like " That is nice, but THIS is what really turns me on", or "I don't really feel good when you do X". I also want to know what he liked or didn't..Then the next day I flirt with him about how good so and so felt and was....that ensures a great time the next time...
     
  15. grace

    grace New Member

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    One thing I worry about is WILL I SOUND CONTROLLING? I tend to make sure he knows what I'm really enjoying but I hate it when a guy says F I'm sorry I don't swear alot and hearing that he's enjoying F me just turns me right off... how do I let them know that without hurting their feelings. I don't mind sexual talk it can very very arousing when he says I want to taste... you know but F I just can't get past that. I like sex making love feel like just that making love I don't just have sex with anyone. So I'm totally new here and need advice.
     
  16. bigpappi

    bigpappi Member

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    we just tell each other during sex. I have NO problem when my wife tells me what she wants,harder,softer,faster,slower,i really don't give a shit. Its all good and we are both having fun. So i know that if i give my wife great pleasure I am sure to get it back just as good from her,if not better!! Hey if she wants me to fuck her harder sometimes,by god tell my and I will fuck as hard as I can...LOL...
     
  17. DirtyThirties

    DirtyThirties New Member

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    Straight after sex is a big no-no. lol. It makes him feel that he didn't perform. During or in normal conversation works for us.

    As the first response said... sometimes he doesn't listen! He'll be so into it he "forgets" how I like it and does it the way he likes it.

    Just keep telling him I say!