how to bring up the whole lets go out or get serious thing?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by fstep, Jun 26, 2007.

  1. fstep

    fstep Banned

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    so i've been in a few serious relationships but each time the girl was the one who initiated the "going out or getting serious" talk and i've never been the one who was in a hurry to push for it so i never really brought up the question on my own

    now the girl i'm seeing i am interested in getting serious with and i'm pretty sure she has at least given it serious thought on her own as she has dropped some hints but she i guess won't bring it up directly and i don't know how to go about it myself

    so any advice on how to initiate this talk or how to bring it up or we...
     
  2. Bluesy

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    Just come out and tell her that you aren't interested in dating anyone else, that you'd like to be exclusive, that she means a lot to you, you care about her, whatever. I would maybe segue into the conversation from a similar topic...I wouldn't just blurt it out, but I think directness is the way to go.
     
  3. vampire raver

    vampire raver New Member

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    Second this,

    Just casually tell her she means a lot to you and you want to take the next step
     
  4. indagroove

    indagroove New Member

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    It takes a sincere conversation. Most of us date in hopes of coming across that one person that totally capitvates us. The one that you cannot ever stop thinking about. The one partner that makes you want to be a better person. The one that you want to give all you have, and don't care what they give back. The one who's faults are cute, or at least an endearing quality. And when you realize you want to wake up every moring with this person, and grow old together, then just let her know. Either she is on the same love-boat, or she's just hitching a short ride.
     
  5. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Blusey is right.
    But I do have a question, If you feel that you want Her to be yours exclusively
    why aren't you able to bring it up in a simple conversation.
    if I couldn't talk to a person seriously I sure as hell wouldn't
    want to go steady yet.

    Hiker
     
  6. fstep

    fstep Banned

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    i can talk to her seriously i'm just not the type to do a lot of that emotional talk stuff .. guess i'll try when the time is right or somethin
     
  7. msduncan

    msduncan Active Member

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    Get used to being the type that does the emotional type stuff. Women need it, and men who aren't able to adapt to giving it at least a little bit of effort wind up isolating the women that they love after years of them feeling deprived. One day they wake up and the woman is ready to leave.... and they wonder wtf just happened!
     
  8. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    So, uhm, is this the girl you did on the 4th of July who cheated on you? Or did you just cheat on her? Just curious; you made it all public.
     
  9. mmmm

    mmmm New Member

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    Just say it. She wouldn't be wasting her time with you if she wasn't thinking the same thing.
     
  10. fstep

    fstep Banned

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    well i'm not going out with either girl i'm just dating the one i want to be with so i wouldn't call that cheating...
     
  11. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    Ah, cuz you described 4th of July girl as a girl you "used to date", until she cheated. Does your current girlfriend know that you're hooking up with other women because you see a big difference between dating and going out?