Hotwife?

Discussion in 'Sexual Fetishes and Fantasies' started by John W, May 30, 2014.

  1. John W

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    I know there is another thread on here right now with the same topic, but it is a year old.

    My wife and I have discussed this for some time now. I have had the fantasy, I guess cuckold, for over thirteen years. She has a crush, well a guy she is really into. After long discussions, she has just left to go see him. It isn't a date per se, but she left with the intention of setting the groundwork to start seeing him.

    If you have read my posts, you know who my wife is. Who else has gone through this? PM me if you have advice.

    I'm torn right now. I'm nervous, but so turned on! What the fuck is wrong with me?
     
  2. AGFUNK

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    There was another guy on here that just started this recently within the last two weeks. He has the same emotions as you.
     
  3. John W

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    The guy with the pregnant wife? I read that and sent him a PM.

    I'm really torn right now. I want her to be happy and have this experience. I have fantasized about it, and think I'm ready. It is just really intense!
     
  4. CaramelLady

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    John,
    I am sorry I have no words of wisdom to offer you. I am not sure if there is something wrong with you. You may be closer to a fantasy coming to reality, but I truly hate to label someone as having something 'wrong' with them.

    If this decision was one that was mutually made and agreed to... then that is between you two.

    Honestly, I can understand why you would be torn.
     
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  5. John W

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    Thanks. This is something we have come to together. I'm excited for her and turned on at the same time? Weird!
     
  6. CaramelLady

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    John many men have fantasies of sharing their woman, or imagining their woman with another man.

    I have spoken to couples that have shared or that swing and it takes a great deal of trust. The men speak of seeing their woman pleased by another man as a great turn on. I have asked if there is any concern about becoming emotionally involved with another person. The common theme is that the love their partner. Ground rules have been set and established to prevent being emotionally compromised.

    I am uncomfortable again with labels that say normal and abnormal. Some would never dream of sharing. Some fantasize only, and a few brave souls like you have decided to take the leap with their partner's blessing.

    Again, I don't want to sound judgmental, but the openness in your relationship is more honest than going behind your partner's back.
     
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  7. John W

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    Thank you! You are too kind in your words. We have come to this together. I have fantasized about it for a long time and only recently has she opened up to it. It is entirely her decision now, knowing I love her and support her no matter what.

    I feel foolish writing that, but this is my only outlet. I can't exactly talk to my friends about this.
     
  8. CaramelLady

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    Please do not feel foolish sharing here. I understand totally about the lack of friends to have open and frank discussions with. That is one reason I am on the forums. To learn and share.

    It you two are happy and the other party knows what they are getting into, and you are not hurting anyone, do what makes you happy.
     
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  9. John W

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    We are happy! The other party isn't aware, so this is putting the toe into the water. He will be aware of our deal if something happens. He does know she is married to me.

    I'm fine, it just feels weird and exciting all at the same time!
     
  10. CaramelLady

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    He does not need to know now! She make talk to him and decide that is the end of that!
     
  11. John W

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    Out of my hands. She just texted me and is having a drink with him now. He just finished playing his set.
     
  12. Love2BKinky

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    There are so many variations of the Hotwife/Cuckold relationship that you have to say "To each their own" but the way I look at is, sharing is another form of sex. Everybody has sex differently. Some never do it doggie style, some never have oral sex, some never anal sex, some never include dildos, vibrators and butt plugs. I like to think of them as the "not normal" people and my wife and I as normal :) I think of multiple partner sex as just another sex experience for our pleasure. But..... I look at it as a sharing experience. It is something my wife and I would do together to ADD to OUR pleasure.

    There are so many variations of the cuckold relationship that you both need to decide what makes you comfortable.
    Will you still have sex with her, will you be made to watch or made to only listen from a closet or another room. Will you be humiliated or respected. Will you service him and her. All things that need to be discussed BEFORE it happens.

    The part of your post I DO NOT aggree with is "It's in her hands now" That sounds like a cop out to me incase it doesn't work out you can blame her.
    It is ALWAYS a joint decision as everything in your marriage should be.

    Enjoy yourselves and let us know how it developes:)
     
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  13. Joys

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    I have had the fantasy for long too and have discussed it with my wife but nothing has happened yet. It is not a cuckold fantasy actually - not like the relation Love2BKinky describes above - but rather a wife-sharing situation, or setting the wife free for sex I could say. So I can have no advice for you but can just share my thoughts.

    First off, like CL has stated several times, you should not label anything normal and abnormal or as having something 'wrong' with you. I think it is 100% normal to be nervous, a long time fantasy has a possibility to be realized, you are turned on by the thought of it, probably a little timid too which is part of the excitement. So nothing weird by that...
    isn't being turned on exciting for you (or should I say, doesn't being turned on excite you)??? I should also quote CL here: "Some would never dream of sharing. Some fantasize only, and a few brave souls like you have decided to take the leap with their partner's blessing.". So why do you feel torn??

    I hope all goes well for you all and I wish I can also say this sometime soon:
    Unlike Love2BKinky, I think it's better to leave it to her decision at this stage, not to blame her if it doesn't work out but to decide whether she will move on with it or not. However, he is the experienced one, not me..

    I couldn't understand what you mean by "He just finished playing his set."
    Again, good luck my friend, keep us posted on what happens
     
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  14. John W

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    Thanks for the responses. Nothing happened, other than them talking for a couple of hours and having drinks. It was a win for her in that she feels like she can attract a man other than her husband (DUH!) and we are both fine with it.

    My saying 'it is in her hands' just meant that we had discussed rules and I would not get in the middle of anything as long as she followed what we agreed.

    If nothing else, the experience was thrilling for both if us and let's just say I'm a little tired at the moment, in a very good way!

    She is still free to peruse this further if she wants, but we will be in open communication about it along the way.

    It's funny that I have to post this on an online forum anonymously, as I couldn't talk to any of my friends about this. I think we are all a little weird when it comes to sex, we just all have different definitions of what weird is.
     
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  15. John W

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    And as for labels, I don't know what to call it. I'm not into humiliation or anything. I just have the desire to watch my wife with another man and possibly participate during or after. This is different, in that she can be with this guy on her own without me there. It's something she wants and something we have agreed to together. What is the definition for that? Beats the hell out of me!
     
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  16. Love2BKinky

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    I understand what you mean by "it's in her hands" Sorry for the way I said it
    After I woke up a little and thought about what you meant, we are the same way and I'm sure most are.
    You are both okay with it and want it but when you finally meet someone new and get to the point of "Is it going to happen" I always leave that up to the wife for her to decide and I am good with whatever way it goes.

    I know what you mean about being tired in a good way.
    Knowing she was with another guy in any degree always gets the juices flowing :D
     
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  17. Love2BKinky

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    We are the same except her playing seperately. I don't care for that.
    Except for one fantasy I have of coming home from work and walking in the door to hear her fucking in the back bedroom.
    I go back there and watch, then join in when he is done.
    She knows of this fantasy but we haven't done it yet.

    As far as a name or definition.... I don't know. Maybe just "Hotwife" or "Love My Wife"
     
  18. 10_3XL

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    That sounds like an "open marriage" to me. You remain married and attached (and I assume in Love) to one another, but are free to explore and be with other partners outside the marital bonds (and bed)... That is, assuming it works both ways. Would she allow for you to go find a mistress or is it strictly a For Her sort of deal (your wife can get a beau, but you cannot have a belle)?
     
  19. Joys

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    It is a good start and she has taken a step so, HURRAY!!!
     
  20. Joys

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    That's more like myself.. It really doesn't meet "cuckoldry" in definition and not really "open marriage" as 10_3XL suggests as long as it's not bilateral. "Hotwifing" or "wife sharing" would be a better definition, but I'm not the expert at all LOL. I'd be fine whether she's on her own or with me there, participating or not during or after.

    Here's a couple good reads:
    http://www.hotwifing101.com/hotwifing_info.htm
    http://www.multiplematch.com/2013/11/hotwifing-cuckolding-the-matriarch-reigns-supreme/

    I know I had an article of definitions too but can't find now. Will post when I find
     
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