heteropaternal superfecundation

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Ryan102, May 21, 2009.

  1. Ryan102

    Ryan102 New Member

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    So what would you do if you found out that you were a heteropaternal superfecundation?.... If you were the parent how would you explain it to your child? Would you just be honest with them and tell them that you were having a sex haven with two other men?
     
    #1 Ryan102, May 21, 2009
    Last edited: May 21, 2009
  2. Logger

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    There is a dilemma of options.

    If a parent raises a child with the idea that monogamy and heterosexuality are idealas to which the parent subscribes and follows, then the parent has set a good example for the child to become a monogamous partner as an adult. So withholding information of deviations from the ideals of monogamy and hetersexuality from the children has the advantage of setting an example of a worthy ideal. However, the child may grow up with an unrealistic view of monogamy, and human relations. So, as an adult, the child with an unrelaistically simplistic idea of monogamy, may be very unforgiving, and unaccomodating, if his/her partner falls off the monogamy wagon, in adult life. Further, if the adult falls off the monogamy wagon, he/she may have unrealisticly harsh self-blame.

    If a parent raises a child with the idea that monogamy is a good ideal, but as an ideal that is mostly met, but not entirely achieved by most people then the child will be less likely to be excessively harsh on people for their slips from the monogamy ideal, and more understanding of the processes of accomodation, forgiveness, reconcilation and larger evolutions of parents love for each other, and the children.

    Probably when the child is younger, it is not important to have first graders discussing marital infidelity, or non-heterosexual encounters by their parents, with their first grade classmates. At what age should the ideals of monogamy and heterosexuality be disucssed with a child, is probably the real question. The age is probably different with each parent and each child. The handling of the topic of non-traditional sex, and how the truth is handled for various situations, is part of the challenges of parenting. Usually this would be a challenge for parenting teenagers.

    Like, "I drink beer, but I don't want you to drink beer."

    Most every family has secrets, and how the family handles secrets is part of what determines the level of success the family members will have in fitting into the society, and sub-sets of society.

    Is a parent responsible for teaching children about everything? Are ther some things children can learn on their own?

    ..
     
  3. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    I assume you're referring to the recent news story about the Texas woman who gave birth to twins who had different fathers:

    http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,520524,00.html

    This is certainly a very interesting dilemma for the parents. Since the woman's husband in this case has decided stay with his wife and raise both twins as his own, then I don't think there's any reason to bring their mother's infidelity to the twins' attention. I'm sure she regrets her actions but not being blessed with a beautiful baby boy in the process. Eventually when the twins get older their parents will have to decide what to tell them, if anything.
     
  4. Logger

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    For a perspective of people in their 20's, what advice would you want from a parent, if you were a yong lady living with a guy with an ear-ring, and an attitude? For instance if you know your Dad has had gay encounters, and you know your guy is probably having some gay encounters on the side, what would you like to hear, or not hear, from Pops now?

    Another instance might be that you are a guy, who has a girl friend, who is unwilling or unable to consider monogamy important? What would you like to her form Dad, when you know He has strayed from pure monogamy, but has done better than your mother, who has regularly deceived your father. What advice would you like to hear from your parents, when you are considering moving in with your less-than-faithful girl friend?



    ..
     
  5. Ryan102

    Ryan102 New Member

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    Wow Logger.....

    I never knew the male brain could hold such a retroperspective discussion like you have been able to hold.

    Granted I am a male and value monogamy but realize that women on occassion may not feel the same way that i do regarding monogamy.

    But then again women find it difficult to get in my pants..(although they definately do try).. unlike most men.... im fairly picky
     
  6. Logger

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    Many aspects of human sexuality are kept secret. So we don't really know what works for most people, because they keep secrets. So making judgements for ourselves, and about our partners, is difficult, because many people are pretending to meet standards of monogamy and heterosexuality, for which they fall short. This forum allows people to express ideas on sexuality annonymously, more openly, than is usaully practical in real life.

    Too often, there are people in our lives, who find pleasure in pointing out people's failures to meet ideal standards. So it is usually wise to keep personal sexual practices secret.


    ..
     
  7. Ryan102

    Ryan102 New Member

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    that may very well be true....but human sexuality secrets can also be solved through elicited response formations.

    For example:

    A woman is putting on a dress in front of her significant other and asks "Does this dress make me look fat?".... of course the man says.... "why of course not hunny" regardless of whether the man thinks the dress makes her look fat or not... he may have other alternative motives to avoid the elicited response formation (e.g. the possibility of getting laid etc etc). If the man is intelligent enough he can pick up secretable hints in understanding how the human female works.

    The womans motives for asking the question may be simple or complex.... if you wish for me to go into the motives of the human female... I will.....they sure are fascinating creatures whereas men are more driven by the possibility of passing his genetical DNA to the female to bear children.

    I can also give more examples of human sexuality elicited response formations as it pertains to secrets and cracking the code to understanding these through elicited response formations.
     
  8. igor

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    Ah - hey folks we now have an expert that totally understands women. :lol