Help with a problem

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by gourdsfan, Jun 6, 2007.

  1. gourdsfan

    gourdsfan New Member

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    Hello, I am a 24 year old male with a problem that I fear is ruining my relationship with my girlfriend. I am a virgin but she is not. Over the past week we have tried to have sex three times but for some reason I cannot get to the point where I cum. I have looked around on here and have seen some posts regarding masturbation and needing to wait a little while for the sensitivity to return, but I don't know if it is this or not. I can cum when I masturbate, but not with her. I don't know if it is just me being nervous but every time it happens it just makes me that much more nervous the next time. Should I go to a doctor?

    My girlfriend is starting to blame herself. She asked me last night if I didn't think she was sexy enough or if I was thinking of someone else during sex. I tried to reassure her that it has nothing to do with her and that I just don't know what is going on because it's now, but I don't really think she believed me. She is the most wonderful person I have ever met and would hate for this to come between us. If anyone could help me out with this I would greatly appreciate it.
     
  2. Slick2

    Slick2 New Member

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    Righteo, I remember me and my boyfriend had the same problem when we first started having sex. He was a virgin and I wasn't. We'd be going at it for ages and he still wasn't cumming. You were wearing a condom right? Because if you were that was probably a big part of the problem, as you won't be used to your penis being stimulated with a condom over it because this takes some of the sensitivity away. All I personally can say (from my experience) is to just work on it and get used to having sex with a condom on (don't stop wearing one!!!) and work on stimulating the penis PLENTY before actually doing it, I know that helped me and my boyfriend. :)
     
  3. longnstrong

    longnstrong New Member

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    If you have to masturebate with the condom on for a while. Or dont masturbate at all.

    if you are uncircumsized try pulling your skin back while putting the condom on. Try pulling your skin back before entering her.

    when you take your dick out how wet would you say it is?
    Next how long before you give up and stop having sex?
    Are you out of shape?
    It takes me a long time to have an orgasm too, not a bad thing, but you need to be in shape.

    Now if you are going to stop using condoms if you are. Be sure she is on birth control for an month and take a blood test. Then it all depend on how much you trust her.

    Is you penis rock hard the whole time you are having sex? Can she make you cum in other ways?

    Do you feel any pleasure at all, does you pleasue ever build up?

    Now what i suggest is, the best sensation is when i first enter a girl. When the head of my dick fulling gets pass her meat curtains. So what i advise is doing that over and over again putting the head of your dick in her and then taking it out repeatedly.
     
    #3 longnstrong, Jun 6, 2007
    Last edited: Jun 6, 2007
  4. vampire raver

    vampire raver New Member

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    Yes I found this to be the best stimulation too.

    When I first started having sex I had a problem cumming to.
    It will take a little bit to find the sweet spots, so to speak, that really turn you on
    If I go hard and fast for a long time, mine becomes numb, so I found the going slow and exiting just barely and the reentering was quite stimulating.

    Also doggy is quite stimulating

    I suggestion googling sexual postions and some sites post giver pleasure, reciever pleasure and comfort. Look at the postions and pick a few that are most stimulating for you and use them

    good luck
     
  5. Steel

    Steel Member

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    It’s probably just nerves… Every relationship I’ve bee in started with L O N G sessions. It takes a while to be comfortable with someone to the point where you don’t feel self conscious. Once you feel more secure things will be better. You did the right thing telling your girl that it isn’t her… of course she will never believe that which adds to the problem! Hang in there and keep us posted.
     
  6. ~emm~

    ~emm~ New Member

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    keep at it, it will sort itself out