Help in bed

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by p00shy, Jul 27, 2007.

  1. p00shy

    p00shy New Member

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    I had recently started to have sex with my girlfriend and my problem is that i cant cum fast enough for her. before i was worried about not being able to last long enough, but it seems that i last too long. :ugh is there anything i can do to speed up the process?
     
  2. Rettet181

    Rettet181 New Member

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    Actually I have the same problem. I recently lost my virginity and have since had sex again, but I can't seem to come with her. It's very surprising to me too because it feels WAY better then masturbating but I never have a problem with that. So you're definitely not alone.

    For me though, I think I've kind of pinned down why. I was raised in a very religious home (Mormon, aka LDS), and have since completely disregarded those beliefs. It has caused a lot of lingering issues, psychologically and with my past relationships. Because "chastity" was a part of these beliefs that were brainwashed into my skull, I think it's causing a sort of mental block within me. I hope that with time this block will subside.

    I have no idea what your issues are, but I know that it comforts me knowing that I'm not alone, and figured it may help you feel better.
     
  3. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

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    How long are you lasting? I'm surprised she'd want you to cum quicker unless you are going more then half hour. I've had issues but only wearing condoms. If so try some different brands and sizes. I found the XL ones fit better which helped.
     
  4. keyboardsrcool

    keyboardsrcool New Member

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    they have lotions and what not that increase the sensation. try one of those. i have recommended on another forum a product called zestra, it is meant for girls but it works just as well on guys. that should get u going
     
  5. Joe

    Joe
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    Practice, practice, practice. :D

    Seriously, you'll figure out soon enough what gets you off the quickest. You're actually blessed to have this particular "problem", as it's more often a problem of getting off too quickly. For me to finish quickly I just start out in missionary position and finish that way. If we want it to last a little longer we'll switch positions a few times. The more times we switch, the longer I'll last.
     
  6. Stangkilla

    Stangkilla New Member

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    Thats a rather unusual problem.
     
  7. mdw6931

    mdw6931 New Member

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    I have/had that problem before. My wife is the first and only person I've ever had sex with, and starting out in our relationship I simply could not cum. For me, it was/is a mental problem mostly. I couldn't get over the initial "OMG I'm actually having sex!" thoughts, and I couldn't get myself into it. It still is a problem occasionally. So perhaps you're overthinking something?

    Also...how long is your foreplay? For me, it helps to have very long, involved foreplay where she strokes and caresses my penis, it really gets me riled up. Then once intercourse starts you're already on the way, so to speak. Just a thought.
     
  8. jgood4u

    jgood4u New Member

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    How long does she expect?

    1. I too, would like to know what her time frame really is. Does she expect it in 2 minutes, 10 minutes, 1 hours??? -- how long?

    2. Expectations like that lead to a condition called performance anxiety. It is when you get anxious about your sexual performance that it screws up the process. It is more common when you can't get an erection, but it can lead to ejaculation problems, too. The basic cure is to stop performing, and relax and just concentrate on the feeling your penis is giving you and on just loving her and sharing the moment. Making love should not be about time and not on a step-by-step schedule. Don't even try to cum. Take the attitude, if I do, fine, if I don't fine -- I'm just going to have a good time with her. If she is telling what and when to do it, that has to stop too.

    3. Outside chance that some medication is messing with your performance.