Have a problem with my girlfriend

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by xavierarmadillo, Nov 11, 2006.

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  1. xavierarmadillo

    xavierarmadillo New Member

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    Its not really a bproblem with her, but more of a problem between us. She is always horny wanting sex and for whatever reason that is not something I think about all day.

    She thinks its her. She thinks I am not attracted.

    Thats not the case. I am just not all into sex as I rarely get anything out of it. It stings to put it in her, and tingles uncomfortably when i cum... but getting up to that point it feels ok. I have always had this with multiple partners and guess I am just not into sex.

    Wierd, a guy not into sex.

    Yes well I have my days when I am all horny, but not everyday like her, or any of my other ex's. I don't get it. We connect in all other areas except this and I hate the feelings of not being good enough or able to please her enough; although she does orgasm very easily.
     
  2. Dreama

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    I think you both need to sit down and have a frank discussion about this. I am sure she does not want you to feel this way, and you have to express to her that you don't want her to feel the way she does. Maybe you could get a doctor's appointment, just to see if medically, there is anything wrong. I've never heard of a guy hurting or stinging during sex. It sounds awful. Just tell her the truth. If she loves you, she will understand. But, you do need to comprimise. Meet her in the middle. Do other things besides just that. Oral sex? Using your hands? Your lady will appreciate the effort, believe me.
     
  3. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    Your low libido could very well be a mental thing. Because you experience unpleasant sensations during sex, you may sub-consciously be denying yourself the feelings/thoughts involved in being horny.

    I agree with Dreama. Substituting oral and hands/finger action would be good for your relationship. BUT, I also agree with Dreama in that you should see a doctor. It doesn't sound normal, and it would be good to get a diagnosis and hopefully a cure. Good luck, and let us know how things turn out. :tup
     
  4. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    Things shouldn't normally sting down there! Do you have lesions? Or foreskin problems? Get yourself checked!
     
  5. yorkiesmurf

    yorkiesmurf New Member

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    It sounds as though there are one of two possible problems going on here. First you might have some type of physical problem. Have you ever injured your back or spinal nerves? How about talking any medication (prescirbed or otherwise) or have a medical condition? I am not a doctor but it sounds as though a part of the problem is almost definately a physical one.

    The other problem I am wondering about regards her. Does she appear to have self-esteem issues,
    There is nothing wrong with a woman who is always horny. However the women that I have dated that were "always horny" and expected me to walk around with a 24 hour hard-on had some type of self-esteem isssue. Meaning, they saw sex as a way of validating their attractiveness and desirability. Could this be the result of you not addressing the issue above and she is internalizing her hurt feelings about your physical problem?

    There is nothing wrong with not wanting sex 24 hours a day. I would recommend getting a physical exam to determine the tingling and stinging feelings. I think both of these issues are inter-related and think as you begin to resolve one the other will resolve itself.
     
  6. Bluesy

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    'Scuse me, why is it normal for a guy to always be horny, but when a woman is super-horny "low self-esteem" may be an issue? That would never, ever come up as a possibility if the situation were reversed. Talk about sexist! :mad
     
  7. xavierarmadillo

    xavierarmadillo New Member

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    I think you are taking the comment out of context and shouldn't jump to conclusions. Please that kind of thing does not help my question and should be posted elsewhere. I could EASILY get into a discussion about sexism and how it is not only men, but I do not think it would be beneficial. The suggestion could help in this case, so it makes good note to be mentioned. It may not be the case in all situations, but perhaps this one.

    Thanks.
     
  8. Bluesy

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    I would never deny that reverse sexism exists--I've seen it in action and find it just as appalling.

    I'll admit that you have a good point about jumping to conclusions. Yorkiesmurf didn't mention whether or not his statements were based on concrete evidence (i.e., the women told him that sex was a form of validation for them) or if it was supposition. I shouldn't have presumed that it was the latter. My apologies.
     
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