Guitar problem...

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by LPjammin, Apr 9, 2008.

  1. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    ...I got a guitar relationship problem. Well, not a problem, really, more of a concern. See, I got this Strat in Phoenix three years ago while visiting my best friend. I didn't play it all the time, not at first. I mean, I have other guitars and one, my favorite, or, used to be favorite, I got brand new, so, you can see where this is going.

    There's nothing wrong with the Strat, at all. I mean, it's a nice blues guitar, plays well, sounds good, stays in tune, all of that, but...well...it's used. I mean, not like falling apart used or anything wrong with it. It's just...used. Plus, it was in Phoenix and that means it could have been anywhere before that, I mean global, you know? Who fucking knows? Maybe some azzhole who plays better than me, you know? Or some sick fucker with fat fingers. Or some bastard who has longer fingers or frets harder or softer than I do or, well, or maybe someone played it longer than I typically do, you know? I mean, I dunno, I feel silly asking, but, well, it bothers me. Someone was there before me.

    I just can't get it out of my mind. I'll be playing and really getting into it and then, out of the blue, I start thinking and I lose time, hit a bad note and, bam, it's like the mood is GONE. The Strat's ready to just keep on going and let me catch up and jump back in on the next measure, but, I can't. I just lose it. My fingers go limp. I feel like the pick is now some sort of unclean thing or something. I can't even look at the guitar at this point and it's starting to happen more and more frequently.

    I can't help it. Did this happen to it before? Did some other person just keep on rolling like it was nothing? The other night, I tried a few beers and got a cool groove going on the drum machine and just turned it up, both of my Marshall heads, the 2203 and the TSL, 4 cabinets and, wall of fucking sound, man.

    But it was no use. I just wanted to cry.

    Huh.

    Now that I think about it, the 2203 is used, too. I got it off some guy on e bay, said he didn't want it any more, that he'd played the shit out of it but it was still in good shape. Works great, classic tone, put a new set of e34l's in it and it rips, but...why did he no longer want it??? I wonder if he dimed everything or if he found a sweeter tone backing the presence or treble off a bit, maybe a bit less pre??? Maybe it sounded better with him???

    What should I do???
     
  2. Barbwire

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    Call the guitar a "slut" and throw it away. :rofl
     
  3. bucky

    bucky New Member

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    Just get rid of that "slut" Strat and find yourself a "Rich Bitch"
     
  4. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    *sigh*

    It sounds to me like you'll never really learn to appreciate or respect that Fender. I agree with the others. Break it off now, before its slutty past and true colors come forth, and it starts to cheat on you with other guitarists.

    Jeez, man...what were you thinking buying a guitar like that? :eyes
     
  5. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    Have you tried sitting down and discussing your feelings with "Strat"? You know it's been said over and over here at :sf: Communication is the most important thing. You need to tell "Strat" about these inner insecurities and your intermittent questions about her past playtimes.

    Getting things out in the open is the first step toward reaching an understanding which will go a long way toward 'bridging' your relationship. 'Fretting' silently won't help at all, in my humble opinion.
     
  6. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    :rofl
    Sheer genius, Rose.
     
  7. Barbwire

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    :bow Rose, we are not worthy, we are not worthy! :bow
     
  8. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    aw, geez, guys :eyes I'm just getting started. Wait till my evil twin shows up! She's an airhead-guitar goddess!
     
  9. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    I've tried...

    ...but it just sits there, "A, B, C, D, E, F, G, A, B, C, D, E, F, G..." same shit over and over again. Once in awhile she'll get sharp with me or have a flat day...but I try to scale that back some...
     
  10. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    Well...

    ...the curves for one, nice knobs...it was, I admit, a rather physical attraction until we started playing around with one another...
     
  11. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    No!

    Mockingbird is my real dream...
     
  12. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    I dunno, LP. Have you thought about spending more time adoring her body. Sounds like you're a 'neck' kinda' guy, and that can get old after a while. Maybe her repetitive "A-B-C-D...." repertoire is indicative of her being bored. :shrug

    Try some 'diminutive' moves on her. You know, sometimes you guys just forget those subtle things that mean the world to your SO. Everyone likes the element of surprise, so switch it up a bit. Let her feel comfortable with where you're going... but at the same time, an occassional switch-up that is your personal 'Signature' will always keep her attentive to your moods and excited to reciprocate.

    jmho :)
     
  13. Irondoctor

    Irondoctor New Member

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    I have a friend you may want to meet.His name is Les Paul,however people here will want to know if you are gay or bi.:lol
     
  14. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    You Know...

    ...MY OTHER GUITAR????????????????????? WTF???? The guy said it was brand new?!?!?


    Wine red? Custom. You better not be playin'...
     
  15. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    I'm going...


    ...to try what you say. Maybe for the next week or two, nothing but finger picking. That's not easy for me, not my strength at all, but, I'm willing to give, to try, to learn and grow...
     
  16. Joe

    Joe
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    :ugh
    I think the two of you need to see a counselor.
     
  17. FlirtyChick

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    Yeah, I think the counselor option is mandatory. I can understand some insecurities about her past fingerings, but it sounds like you are a little over the top in your obsession, and you are just stringing her along. Get help now!!!!
     
  18. Bluesy

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    Or perhaps it's time for LP to take a quiet vacation in the countryside...at a residential facility where nice people in white coats will give him happy pills to make him forget all about guitars :coocoo



    :rofl @ this entire thread!
     
  19. BassDude

    BassDude New Member

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    Hey um LP...I think I might have had your Strat Pussycat before you did. And guess what? I'm a bassist, so my instrument is longer than yours...35" versus your 25 1/2". Sorry about that...really.

    BD
     
  20. FlirtyChick

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    Yes, isn't it joyful to have a friendly thread for a change? :):):)