god'll get ya!

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Barbwire, Sep 23, 2008.

  1. Barbwire

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    I don't know if any of you recall the story of when HotWheels hurt himself trying to take peenie pics for me, but I surely do regret mocking him at the time. As they say, god'll get ya. Here is my tale of woe..

    I had a cyber session this afternoon, and was just basking in the afterglow for a bit with my lover for a bit when, my neighbor pulled into my driveway in her car.

    I told my cyber stud I had to split, yelled to my neighbor out the window that I would be right down, and dressed in a hurry. After talking to my neighbor for while, she left, and I went back in the house. I was still pretty horny and decided to rub out another. I sat at my desk to surf for porn, and soon, I had my heels on the desktop, legs wide open, fucking myself with a dildo while using my Hitachi Magic Wand on my clit.

    After a while, I was really going to town, my lubrication was as slick as an eel and dripping down my ass crack and onto the seat. I was working up something pretty intense and it was making me just wild with lust.

    I looked down and saw how wet I was. It was such a fine sight; I decided it was only fair to share it, so I grabbed my camera. I leaned back in the chair to get a picture of my pussy being slammed by the dildo, and that’s when things went all a’screwy.

    The wheels on my chair rolled forward, as I leaned back, and before I knew it, I was crashing to the floor. I hit the back of my head on the shelving unit behind my desk and felt a sharp pain at the base of my neck.

    As I lie there, the dildo still buried in me, the vibrator buzzing it’s way across the floor, my first thought, believe it or not, was how funny a picture would be. I reached for the camera but it was too far away. I tried to upright myself, and that’s when I realized I was stuck. The chair was wedged between the desk and the shelves.

    I started to flail around like a turtle on its back, making the lamp on the shelving unit start to rock back and forth. I looked up at it and realized if it fell, it would hit me squarely on the forehead. I lay there, panting a bit, and formulated a plan. I rocked my hips to the left and managed to crawl out of the chair on my hands and knees.

    Oddly enough, I was still really close to coming, so I flipped the chair back up on its legs and finished myself up with the Wand. I had just caught my breath when the fucking neighbor showed up again. Once more, I yelled I’d be right down, dressed in a flash and went downstairs to see what she wanted.

    She started talking my ear off, and as I stood there, the pain in my neck got worse and worse. Next thing I know, some clown in a rusted out Chevy pickup is pulling in and I see there’s a freezer strapped in the bed of it. He tries to peddle some meat and seafood, and I tell him I don’t buy food from door to door salesmen. He left, and I turned to my still babbling neighbor and told her I had a headache and needed to go lie down.

    She said she was sorry to bother me, and left…THANK GOD! By the time I climbed the two flights of stairs back into my bedroom, I was hurting, but still, being the kind of person I am, I grabbed my camera and took a picture of my work desk so you could all see the predicament I was in, earlier.

    After that, I called my chiropractor. I have an appointment tomorrow and I can't wait to see the look on his face when I tell him how I hurt myself. :dgrin

    Where it all went down...

    [​IMG]





     
  2. Berrylicious

    Berrylicious New Member

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    OMG haha i love it!!

    The start of your story was hot...actually makes me want to go to town on myself right now....then i thought oh no and laughed and felt awful for you!!

    Thanks for the pic!! That lamp would have knocked you out cold....imagine if your neighbour found you like that, knocked out, dripping wet with lube and a big dildo sticking out LOL!

    Could have been worse *hugs*
     
  3. Rose

    Rose Resident Sexy Grandma
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    :eyes I bet you cleaned that whole friggin' office/desk area before you took the picture. Nobody's desk looks that neat! :rofl.... (literally - - Roll On The Floor Laughing!!)
     
  4. Dreama

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    Ouch! I'm sorry you got hurt, but at least you can say it's a sexual injury....
     
  5. Katprr

    Katprr New Member

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    Sorry CL, I don't mean to LMAO, but you know I have to. LOL I have many stories similair to that, in fact I have actually ended up in a neck brace and almost surgery due to fracturing my C3 in my neck due to playing with myself, but that is another story all by its self.
    Glad you are okay though!!!
     
  6. igor

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    Hey CL, that lamp looks like it's covered in duct tape. Have you had other too-close encounters before?:lol

    (Hey Rose: you're right - she must have cleaned the place - ya don't see any sex toys there do ya? :D )
     
  7. heelfetish

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    *hf spits water out all over his monitor* Oh, great. Now I have to clean that up too. :eyes

    Thanks for the story and the hilarious visual, CL! :tup
     
  8. HardRocker

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    You're not really going to tell the Doc how you did it... are you?
    Never mind, already I know the answer.
     
  9. Barbwire

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    Thanks for reading. :)

    Nope, I didn't. Here's a little secret, I am a bit of a Felix Unger. :eek:

    Yes, at least I have that. :cool

    There you go again, always trying to one up me! :lol

    Very observant, Igor. Yes, the lamp is indeed, held together with tape. It's a long story how it got broke, but unfortunately, not a very sexy one.

    It was my pleasure to make you spit, Heely baby.

    I would have told him, but alas, he did not ask how I flipped my chair over. :(
     
  10. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    Well, I hope you've learned your lesson, young lady. :lol How's the neck, by the way?
     
  11. Barbwire

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    It's much better today; thank you for asking.
     
  12. BinghamtonNY

    BinghamtonNY Member

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    LMAO at that pic! Glad you're okay. I just HATE it when my wife gets a stiff neck. ;)
     
  13. Barbwire

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    We celebrated my husband's birthday last night, he got a steak, a cake, and a blowjob. I'm happy to report my neck feels just fine. :dgrin
     
  14. BinghamtonNY

    BinghamtonNY Member

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    Sounds just about perfect! :D
     
  15. Barbwire

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    Oh, and he got to watch UFC, as well. Yep, he was one content man by the time he fell asleep last night. ;)
     
  16. Berrylicious

    Berrylicious New Member

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    You're a good wifey CL.

    BTW...what is UFC?? (Aussie here has no idea)
     
  17. HardRocker

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    The most recent TV/Vegas fad exploiting brutality in the ring, or in this case it's an octagon. Ultimate Fight Challenge is any mixed martial arts, wrestling, and boxing skills a fighter can bring to the ring to knock out his opponent.

    They wear small minimally knuckle-padded half gloves with exposed fingers. Most go barefoot with no pads. A KO can be pinning and choking until your opponent falls unconscious, dislocates a limb, or a flat out concussive blow to the head. It's perfectly legal for a fighter to pound his opponent while he's already laying on the floor. If a fighter feels there is no escape, he can Tap Out by tapping 3 times on anything he can reach... the floor, his opponent, etc. The Referees are now getting a bit more cautious about calling a fight to protect an obviously losing fighter. That usually pisses off the crowd, and sometimes pisses off the losing fighter. Early UFC fights frequently left the octagon smeared with blood and teeth if a fighter was lucky enough to have had any before the fight.

    I know it comes on Spike TV, and I think maybe TNT or one of those Turner Broadcasting cable stations.

    This is just my observation after watching several bouts to see what all the excitement was about. I guess I could've Wikied it, to get more factual information, but feel free to investigate it further.
     
  18. Hot Wheels

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    After my little effort.....I can't laugh at you:eek:
    Glad you didn't suffer any serious injury.....:D

    Please reread the lower portion of my signature though ok....:brow
     
  19. sexyJ

    sexyJ New Member

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    That was great...lmfao! Sorry you got hurt but it was a funny story indeed...
     
  20. Barbwire

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    HardRocker described it to a "t". I don't watch it, myself, too bloody.



    :finger

    Yeah, but getting hurt is worth is sometimes when you have a good story to tell about it. :lol

    As a follow-up..after the doc adjusted me, I didn't feel half bad. Then, the next day, my pony was very, very bold. I was sitting on the ground, taking pics, and he came over to me for a pet. I scratched him for a bit then tried to push him away. Next thing I know, he's having a tantrum. He lunged at me, bit my shoulder, then knocked me on my back as I tried to get up.

    So, my back, neck and shoulder ended up hurting all over again. Guess who's for sale? :mad

    He looks too innocent to hurt anyone, doesn't he?

    [​IMG]

    This is where he got me. Kinda looks like a hickey, doesn't it?

    [​IMG]