GF wants it in the ass, how do I go about doing it?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by cube30, Aug 21, 2007.

  1. cube30

    cube30 New Member

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    Know, I am not that stupid I know how to do it, but I was just wondering what I need to use to make sure it doesnt hurt her. When we are having sex, she will ask for it in the ass and I will finger it for her and she loves that and I wanted to finger her first before I just stuck my dick in there so she would be sure she would like it. So now she really wants me to do it in her ass. Any advice on anything would be nice. Thanks.
     
  2. Fliteskates

    Fliteskates Member

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    I've used all kinds of anal lube products.. fingered my g/f ass.. etc.. before I entered her.. and it was always still tough to slip it in. When I was in her ass it felt like her ass was choking my dick...

    Then one time we used KY massage oil while we where having sex... rubbed it all over each other's bodies.. while she was riding me I was fingering her ass... when I finally got behind her I slipped in so fast she and I where both shocked.

    It felt great and she loved it to.

    I'd say that was the best method I ever tried.
     
  3. Buffalo204

    Buffalo204 Member

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    It was so hard not to be a wise ass on this one... There are about 50 types of lube at any adult shop or crisco works well. Lots of lube and go slow.
     
  4. suite91

    suite91 Member

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    There are two keys to anal sex. Especially the first time.

    1)Lube. Lots of it. Use your fingers to get some inside her. If you think you've used too much then add some more. DO NOT use desensitizing lube! The anus is very delicate and pain is the warning before serious damage occurs. I like WET products but KY and Astroglide are good too.

    2)Go slow! It will hurt her, how much is up to you. If you take your time and work at it slowly with her guiding your movements, then you'll both enjoy it. Don't be surprised if when the head of your cock first slips into her she winces and wants you to pull out. There is a second muscle ring just inside the first that needs a chance to adjust too. As you're are just getting through the first, the second says "What the FUCK!". She will recover then start again gently. Give her a chance to adjust to this before going deeper.

    If you follow what I've said then soon she and her muscles will relax and you can both have a pleasant and erotic experience - one that you'll both want to repeat. Many women will tell you of their terrible experiences and how they will NEVER try anal sex again. Don't spoil it for her or her future lovers!

    Take care and good luck!
     
  5. cube30

    cube30 New Member

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    thanks for all the advice everyone keep it coming it is quite helpful. she comes home from school in two weeks and she wants to try it then so hopefully I will have enough advice to do so thanks.
     
  6. p00shy

    p00shy New Member

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    Slow and steady win the race
     
  7. Bluesy

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    That's quite the contradiction. Fact is, no pain is ever acceptable pain when it comes to anal play/sex. Surgeons had to rethink their procedure for dilating the anus for colorectal surgery because some patients' anal sphincters were permanently damaged from being dilated too quickly. (In other words, the patients became fecally incontinent. Lovely, eh?) Shoving an object through an anus that is not properly prepared to receive it can cause over-dilation, which could very well cause the same sort of damage. Pain in the anus/rectum is the body's way of saying "STOP NOW".

    Be aware that anal sex is a high risk activity and bad things can happen if you aren't careful. Aside from possible sphincter damage, a tear in the rectum (the membrane is thin and susceptible to injury) can lead to problems with infection, which will lead you to the hospital for surgery, because once infection sets in that's the only way to repair the damage.

    Most people need to gradually dilate the anus over time before they can engage in painless, enjoyable anal sex. You can do this by purchasing a small (some stores call them "beginner's") anal toy, whether that be a plug, probe, wand, and, personally, I'd go with something that vibrates because anal massage feels exquisitely lovely when you're in the mood. *happy sigh* It's always good to preface anal sex with an activity that's going to loosen the sphincters, anyway. And make sure you use plenty of lube (NO desensitizing lubes) on that toy.

    Please educate yourself, and your gf, so both of you can make an informed decison to participate in anal sex: http://www.talksexwithsue.com/analsex.html.

    Sorry for the doom and gloom, but a lot of people don't take anal sex half as seriously as they should. Good luck to you, be safe, and have fun!
     
  8. hellrose18

    hellrose18 New Member

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    like they say slow and steady wins the race
     
  9. cook74

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    Not that I have ever tried it, neither am I recommending it, but a gay couple that I am friends with have often bragged about the relaxing powers of "Rush" or amyl nitrate. Has this worked for anyone else in regard to anal sex? Or is it too dangerous because of potential side effects?
     
  10. Bluesy

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    Well...it's an illegal substance in the U.S. There are dangerous, potentially fatal, SEs, too.
     
  11. cook74

    Gold Member

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    I realize that this drug is illegal and dangerous, please don't think I was advocating the use of it. I was just curious about its popularity, or lack thereof.:eek:
     
  12. zapper

    zapper Member

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    Rush, from what I recall of it, sucks. Now mind you it's been like twenty years since I did this stuff, but you snort it, it gives you like a thirty second buzz or head "rush", and that's it. woo hoo. I don't think it will do fuck all for anyone about relaxing their asshole.
     
  13. p00shy

    p00shy New Member

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    surprise butt sex! j/k. slow and easy. start off with your fingers. use lots of lube and a condom. have fun!
     
  14. Bluesy

    Gold Member

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    Naughty Knickers authored a fabulous post about anal sex in another thread in the General Sex forum recently:

     
  15. cbrmale

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    I have a bit of experience as a giver of anal sex.

    1. The more aroused your partner is, the better. What worked for all the girls I've had anal sex with was lots of oral, lots of anal play, lots of dirty talk (I want to fuck your arse) and then some straight fucking. By that stage, if a woman's not aroused, she never will be. Normal intercourse before anal helps a lot by the way.

    2. I read the comments about lube, and lots of it. The first couple of times I had anal was with girls who knew what they were doing and what surprised me was how little lube they used. The lesson of this is if the girl is confident, relaxed and aroused: anal works. Not only works, they were able to take my large-girth penis without any pain whatsoever. First time for your girlfriend isn't going to be as easy as this, but reassurance before the act that anal sex can be easy and pain-free might help to relax her enough to make it a pleasurable experience. Do use lots of lube by the way, because the girls I first had anal sex with had done it A LOT!

    I hurt one of those girls for a moment, I saw it in her face as she lowered herself on me. She stopped, waited, and then continued okay. Pain is not acceptable. If it hurts and your partner is in control, she knows what to do. If it hurts and you're in control, she must tell you and you must stop. Doesn't mean its over, just means things still aren't quite ready for full penetration.
     
  16. downloadking

    downloadking Member

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  17. RumBalls

    RumBalls New Member

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    I would never put any of that stuff into my body. That's dangerous stuff.
     
  18. RedHotLady

    RedHotLady New Member

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    lots of lube and patience ;) and I agree with the others...get her ready by using your fingers..it also helps if she is extremely turned on..
     
  19. LPjammin

    LPjammin New Member

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    Just to be graphic and clear about...

    QUOTE=cube30;166640]Know, I am not that stupid I know how to do it, but I was just wondering what I need to use to make sure it doesnt hurt her. When we are having sex, she will ask for it in the ass and I will finger it for her and she loves that and I wanted to finger her first before I just stuck my dick in there so she would be sure she would like it. So now she really wants me to do it in her ass. Any advice on anything would be nice. Thanks.[/QUOTE]

    ...this, wait until she's taken a nice BM. Then, jump in the shower and soap and lather each other, nice and long and slow. Play with her anus, outside, again nice and slow, teasing the opening with a soapy finger. Just go all over her, coming back, teasing, working it in, a little more, a little more.

    Before long she'll be begging you to work your finger deeper. EZ does it. Her pussy is gonna be on fire. Play with her there too but don't make her or let her cum. She'll be in a daze and just be soooo ready. You'll find her comfort level with your finger in her azz where she's gripping it and then relaxing and allowing it. Never force it when she grips. Always wait for her to accept it. Then, a little more. She'll grip, stop. Lather, rinse, repeat. She's getting used to the sensation and over the feeling she's gotta shit and moving into pure, 100% pleasure.

    Eventually, if she's relaxed and happy, you'll be able to finger fuck her azz some and she'll be more in tune with the grip/relax/ impulse and more in control of it, allowing you as she pleases. You can still change up pace on her and make her grip, and you stop right away and back to the routine. It will drive her crazy.

    So, get out of the shower, her azzhole will be nice and clean, she'll be a bit shaky, ready. Lube your finger and keep up that pattern of working it in, not fighting her, waiting for her to allow it. Now, she's lubed. Lube your dick or let her, pretty good. You don't need a mess of it as she is 1/2 the equation and from your finger, she's good to go.

    Find out what's easier for her to relax; on her back or all fours. I've seen both, so, ask.

    Show time; now that she's in position and comfy, move the head of your dick to her azz and press, lightly, firmly. She'll be in that grip/relax cycle all over again as now something larger is trying to get in. Be CAREFUL here. She's gonna let you in a bit but once the head is in STOP and let her get used to it. Don't be surprised if she comes right then and there. If she does, stay in control and don't take that as a clue to barge on in. It will be real hard on you but you could ruin it right here and hurt her.

    So, you just keep working, like the finger, and, if all systems are a go, she'll be ready for you to start fucking her azz. DO NOT GO ANY DEEPER than she is ready for. Go SLOW so you'll know when you're reaching any discomfort for her and STOP. Ease back and, when she's ready, start in again, shorter strokes. When you start coming do NOT just pound her unless she gives the go ahead.

    Now, as has been stated, everyone is different. I had one lady who, after a few minutes, was ready for me to fuck her as hard and deep as I liked. She was a natural azz fuck lover. Another, it took lots of time as described. Point is, you and your woman get to figure it out, how quick, how slow, etc. PAY ATENTION. She'll make it clear where she is.

    Done well it's gonna be an incredible, intense experience for your both.

    PS: Unless you are monogamous with each other and you both KNOW you've zero STD's, gotta use the darned rubber.
     
  20. cube30

    cube30 New Member

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    Thank you for all the advice keep it coming I appreciate it. The shower idea is a really good one I like it and she is coming home from school this weekend and I think if she is still willing and ready, I will try it thank you all very much. Is baby gel good lube to use? I have used it when I finger her ass and she liked it so would that be good to use as well?