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Discussion in 'Ask a Guy/Girl' started by elonlyBuster, Oct 23, 2008.
How do you go about getting fuck buddies, cut friends, and such?
I think it pretty much just happens. Usually with a friend or acquaintance.
Maybe join an adult website like adult friend finder.
What is a "cut friend"?
A "polite" way of calling someone a fuck buddy.
I am not a guy, but I have a fuck buddy. Just have to get lucky and find someone you connect with on a cranial level, then go at it. I found him here. And I didn't even mean to.
I am lucky. I found what I was not looking for and now I cannot get enough.
Ahhh, the friend with benefits! So good to have... until you start seeing someone.
These things just happen. I found mine almost by accident. We're very compatible at sex but I never wanted to date him. I felt that if I did, and I didn't like what I found out, that I'd never be able to sleep with him again. It's all logical... in my head.
Good luck finding yours!!
No offense or anything to you or any other girl, but it's basically a fact that all a girl has to do is find a guy and say "Hey you wanna by me friend and get a few benefits" and most will jump on the proposal. Where as a guy being a guy has to "work" at it and basically I guess get lucky.
Common misconception!! Not true AT ALL!
I've never heard of 'cut friend' sounds kinky
I had a fuck buddy all through college, I think it's a good thing. Because we weren't dating we had a much more casual sexual relationship, which meant we could experiment more and toss out ideas without really upsetting the other person. I think we both learned a lot about the opposite sex.
Hi Hilly...misconception that guys have to work at it more than ladies? Do tell!
OK, Flirty must've been drinking last night! I guess the proverbial cat is out of the rhetorical bag, eh? Flirty has a little friend with benefits...he emerged a few months ago, we talked about it all quite a bit, and decided to give each other full erotic privileges with other people. I'm still looking for my friend with benefits...but I have to admit I'm really enjoying the search!
So, actually, since I'm currently looking for a friend with benefits for myself, I'll post a few thoughts.
If you're a guy, I think AdultFriendFinder is totally useless...probably works for ladies, but for guys, you're competing against probably 100 guys for every lady...unless you look absolutely spectacular, I doubt you'll even get a response to emails.
I'm not looking for one-night stand nor am I looking for a new wife. There doesn't seem to be such a great middle ground for men looking for a long-term FWB. I think I'll personally have more luck in person than via some of the web-sites. Now the exceptions are probably some of the more relationship-oriented (versus sex-only oriented) web-sites. Could be dangerous ground there though for someone like me who is already married (in terms of drama). Swinger sites don't work so well because most swingers are couples and most couples won't allow each other to play alone (although some do).
I really think the best source is just meeting women in day to day life. I have been hitting the bars too. (Although I've never really been a pickup artist...I'm just myself and brave enough to ask for a phone number...:lol)
There's a little waitress who used to be a stripper that I'd love to have as an FWB for at least a while. However, she's got a boyfriend and I really would rather not get shot in the head...I also rule out married female cheaters for the same reason...the best lay in the world isn't worth it.
BD and FC- you all rock. Hubby and I's FWB situation was founded because we had some friends who were into the same type of things as us, and it's just been history from there. It's not that hard to find a great middle ground when you find the right person/people- of course, thats the hard part.
How do you determine that you actually need/want a friend with benefits in the first place? I could definitely go for one, but I honestly haven't decided on which way I'd like to go (FWB or Relationship).
I dunno if we rock, but we try. There's some "growing pains" involved in situations like this...we have to be very considerate of each other, very sensitive to each other's feelings, put tremendous effort into communicating clearly so we don't misunderstand each other, and then put the effort into insuring that we act according to our intentions. And it's as much introspective as well as extrospective. The fact that we play alone introduces some complications that folks who play only as couples don't face. However, like anything else in a relationship, successfully working through any rough spots just makes you stronger as a couple.
Do you want to have sex and friendship, dates and fun, etc., without any intended permanent commitments? That would be what I see as an FWB. If you're looking for a permanent commitment (like a spouse or equivalent), that's not an FWB...of course, an FWB could become a life partner.
I use RHP which is an aussie dating site, I am finding it a lot easier to find women than to find a nice man who can string two words together. I/we are looking for a F for FF FMF / a M for MFM and a FM for MFMF.........
Honesty is the key... you need to be honest with yourself about what you want, if you are honest with yourself, that honestly instantly transfers to the people you associate with
I am officially looking for a friend with benefits.
I've never been on dates with a FWB... That would be called "dating" to me.
I don't see any reason why a FWB couldn't go on a "date" with a person, if in the ground rules with your SO you say its cool- I mean, why not go out and have a few drinks, or get to know the other person-or become friends with them? I don't know about anyone else, but I'd like to know who I'm fucking. I mean, dates don't have to be only between partners-I have dates with my platonic girlfriends. I guess its how you define it, huh?