Friendship sex?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by JuicyB, Jul 4, 2008.

  1. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    I'm convinced it exists, and that's a legitamate, and often fruitful option!

    What other human relationship tagged types of sex are common?

    1. Make up sex.
    2. Break-up sex.
    3. in-love sex
    4. revenge sex
    5. looking-for-love sex.

    The list goes on, but I want to comment of friendship sex. I went back to my home town once (I'd been gone for a decade) and met up with a girl I knew in high school. We had never dated, but always knew each other; had friends in common. My visit was for about 10 days. I'll shorten the story to say we started having sex after the 2nd day! And we did it everyday, and sometimes twice a day till I left! We've always been good friends, and we'll continue to be. We both knew that the prospect of a relationship was out of the question. But boy, did we get it on! So really think there is such a thing as "friendship sex"! Do you all agree?
     
  2. cbrmale

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    I've had a lot of friendship sex, and for me it's something very special. With a friend, you sometimes go places that you don't with a lover, and perhaps more often too. I think it's partly the fact that you are together as a couple for one thing only, and partly the fact that it's not going to last and therefore slide into repitition. It's new, exciting and destined to end with happy memories, unless someone makes the fatal mistake of thinking that friendship and good sex is leading to a place that isn't destined to be.

    I think that it takes a special person to thrive with friendship sex, or even consider it. Clearly I have the personality type (pragmatic and a little ruthless) to deal with the boundaries and issues that this type of temporary relationship can entail. In other words, I don't think friendship sex for everyone, particularly the ones who need or desire 'love' to enjoy sex.
     
  3. Dreama

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    Embarking on a journey like that with your friend really requires careful consideration and discussion. You want to make sure that what everyone hopes to get out of that sexual relationship is basically on the same level...But yeah, it does exist. And I think that it could be cool if you're totally fine with not having them as a significant other or whatever else. However, I don't know how you could say that love doesn't exist in that because it certainly does. Love is the crux of any friendship or relationship...Just a different type than what 'lovers' share. I think that is a very special thing, independent of the normal consensus of what love is, and that if one were so inclined, they could be fulfilled by that kind of love only within the relationship without resentment. Of course, communication is key.

    That's just my .02 cents.
     
  4. erosexpressions

    erosexpressions New Member

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    I used to have an interesting relationship with my best friend were we'd get together, hang out and then shag like rabbits all the time. the problem was there was def. more feeling behind it on her end than just sex. It also carried through into a couple of our relationships with other people and didn't end too well. while we both enjoyed it at the time, friendship sex has to have very clearly defined limits and times otherwise its just like anything else...a time bomb
     
  5. ninja08hippie

    ninja08hippie Official SF Hugger
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    I had a sex buddy in college. We both knew that it wouldn't go anywhere, we just had fun. Friendly sex exists, and it's great. :)
     
  6. Joe

    Joe
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    I've only had one "friend with benefits", but we started right out with the benefits and became friends as the relationship progressed. She was a professional woman, married to a corporate manager. They had no sex life to speak of and she had grown tired of waiting and begging and going without; however, they had a teenage daughter in high school and lived in a smallish town, so she wanted to be very discrete about having an affair.

    We met online and chatted a bit, then she started talking about meeting somewhere for some hot sex. She made it clear that it was only sex and friendship she wanted -- no love affair, just a sexual outlet and some companionship. Sounded good to me. (I'd been recently widowed and wasn't ready for a serious relationship.) We lived 400 miles apart, so we set up a hotel meeting in a city between us.

    When I arrived she met me at the door wearing a t-shirt and nothing more. We engaged in some chit-chat for a few minutes, then I excused myself and took a quick shower. When I came out of the bathroom we went straight to the business at hand -- a no-holds-barred evening of weed, champagne, strawberries, kissing, licking, sucking and fucking. In the afterglow of each session we'd get to know each other better verbally, but that would only last a short while before we were back to the sex.

    The first meeting went well, so we continued to meet like this for about a year, every month or two. Sometimes it was only for a night, if I happened to be traveling through her area on business, and sometimes it was for two or three days and nights. Once she came and spent a week with me in my home.

    We had agreed from the beginning that when one of us decided it was time to end it, that would be it. Well, I met my (now) wife shortly after that first meeting. I told her about my friend-with-benefits from the start, and that was fine with her, but after about a year my (now) wife and I started getting pretty serious, so it was time to end the affair with the friend.

    She wasn't happy to have our little party come to an end, but I think she was happy for me that I'd found someone special. Even after my wife-to-be moved in with me, she continued to call me every now and then. If I was out and my wife (to be) answered the phone, they'd chat. Eventually I told the friend that I was getting married again and I thought it was time she stopped calling. (I had sensed a little jealousy.) I haven't heard from her since; it's been 6 or 7 years.

    The last time we talked she told me her marriage seemed to be a little better, but she wasn't sure if she'd be staying with her husband or leaving him. She'd been working about 150 miles from home and spending about half her time there. Her daughter was living with her and attending college.

    It would be interesting to hear from her again, just to learn how she felt about our little affair in retrospect. For me there really was little downside to it. I felt a little guilty about having an affair like that, but I'm also of the opinion that if one of the partners in a marriage isn't providing any affection for years on end, the other can't be blamed for seeking it outside the marriage. (I was trapped in a marriage like that myself. I didn't cheat, but I know how awful it feels to be shunned by your spouse.) Anyway, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.
     
  7. loveit247

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    Well, every time I have sex it is with my best friend. I am one lucky girl. ;)
     
  8. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    Same here. :)

    Every time I have sex, it's "friendship" sex.

    But I see what the OP is getting at. I'm of the opinion that so-called FWB relationships don't work that often. Back in my wild days I had a one night stand with this guy, who afterward said that he wasn't interested in a relationship, and what happened the night before was just a "friendly fuck." Anyway, that didn't seem very friendly at all.
     
  9. igor

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    I would add another category called "obligation sex." That means your partner will allow you to have sex with them because it is part of the marriage contract. You put up with it because you feel it is better than no sex at all.
     
  10. loveit247

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    How about corridor sex. It is when you have been married for year and walk past your SO in the corridor and say "fuck you"
     
  11. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
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    :rofl
    I love it!
     
  12. erosexpressions

    erosexpressions New Member

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    Winner :bow
     
  13. igor

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    That's about where I am at now :lol
     
  14. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    Sounds mad!

    Are you upset about something love-it?
     
  15. HardRocker

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    I'd forgotten that one, except I called it Hall Sex. Always got a laugh. Thanks for reminding me, my mind is swiss cheese with jokes.
     
  16. johnnyangel694u

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    When I was at the young age of 20, there were 2 girls about my age that ran on the ambulance with me. We had an arrangement. If one of them or myself was horny all we had to do was say so and off to the apartment we could go. Ahhhh, the good ole days. I sure miss them.
     
  17. HardRocker

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    All three of you? Excellent. :cool
     
  18. bluey

    bluey New Member

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    i only had one "friend with benefits"
    ...that lasted about 2 weeks....
    and we've been together for nearly a year now :lol
     
  19. loveit247

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    No at all. It is an old joke.
     
  20. mikemanmike

    mikemanmike New Member

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    I have a friend that I would lovee to have sex with but dont wanna ruin the friendship and dont want to risk asking if she doesnt want it, but she seems just maybe to be the person that would, how should i approach this situation?