Foreplay preference: Focus, or multitask?

Discussion in 'Sexual Foreplay and Techniques' started by daver, Dec 21, 2010.

  1. daver

    daver New Member

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    My gf can't seem to get enough of me squeezing, rubbing, sucking & nibbling on her breasts, but she's not very good at verbally telling me what she likes most. What I'd especially like to know is whether she gets off more when all the attention is placed on one of her nipples at a time, or whether she likes it if I use my fingers to play with the other one while I'm sucking or nibbling on the first.

    So I'd like to hear others' views about what they or their SO's prefer -- focus on one at a time, or multitask?

    And, for that matter, I'd also like to know whether women like having a man play with their breasts while he's going down on them... or is that also a case where all the focus should be between her legs?
     
  2. blondi

    blondi Member

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    lol if im being eaten out, i dont much care what else theyre doing lol but as far as boobs alone...i like one to get attention as much as the other, it really gets me going when he squeezes one side while licking the other....mmmmm ;)
     
  3. Jonger84

    Jonger84 New Member

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    I think this is a good question .. I will be waiting for answers too ;)
     
  4. htoad

    htoad Active Member

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    My wife and I both like to multitask. Generally speaking our mouths are doing one thing while our hands are doing something else. A few examples:
    - We will both suck her breasts while I finger her pussy.
    - She will lick my nipples while she strokes my cock.
    - She will suck my cock while I fondle her breasts and nipples. Depending on the position I will also finger her pussy, or she will masturbate.
    - While I eat her pussy we both play with her breasts, or she will suck her nipples.
    - During 69, if she is on top I will play with her breasts and ass while I eat her pussy. If I am on top she will fondle my nipples.

    We find the"multitasking" very enjoyable. I like it because it helps her gets multiple orgasms. Though it can at times challenge my ability to "last" one we start screwing, Bunnie does not mind at all.
     
  5. sinner

    sinner New Member

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    I'm sorry but I don't think this question can be answered. Foreplay is a process not an act. So the short answer is "both". For me this begs the question " what is foreplay?". For me foreplay starts long before we are in bed with our clothes off. This can vary based on where you are in a relationship. Even a one night stand starts with eye contact. Holding hands during a movie is foreplay just as much as sucking on her tit. One of the secrets of a good date is absolute focus on the other person. So even if that results in close the door, rip the clothes off hands all over each other sex you probably had focus before that. That kind of sex is great but don't forget to build intimacy with your partner with some long slow touching. Trade massages learning every curve and crease every dimple and mole. Different parts of the body have different scents. For me its her hair. Its the perfume on her neck. The soap she uses. Even her underarms not to mention her juices that at this point are inevitably flowing. Listen to the sounds of each others bodies. The lub dub of the heart and the way it quickens as excitement rises. I even like listeniing to grrr of her stomach with my ear pressed to her stomach. There are different tastes of lips and perspiration and of couse more private fluids. If you don't focus on these aspects of your partner you will miss so much of what sex of what making love has to offer. So my answer is yes focus on body parts one at a time or you will miss the subtlties and nuances that make your partner special.
     
  6. SWGirl

    SWGirl New Member

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    I'll answer the unanswerable.

    I enjoy "multitasking" to a point, but where he leaves off, I tend to start up. If he's giving me oral, I'm usually rubbing my stomach or playing with my boobs, and vice-versa.
     
  7. daver

    daver New Member

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    A couple of the answers are a bit more general than what I had in mind. My fault for making the title of this thread seem to be a reference to foreplay in general. So let me be more specific and just ask women:

    1) when your partner is going down on you, do you like his hands fondling your breasts? Or does that perhaps distract from your own ability to focus on what he's doing between your legs?

    2) When his attention is on your nipples, do you prefer that he stick to one at a time (giving equal time to both, of course), or work on both concurrently?

    And when I talk about "multitasking" in this specific instance, I'm just talking about what is being done to her, without regard to what she is doing.
     
  8. sinner

    sinner New Member

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    sorry. I totally missed the question.
     
  9. andretti

    andretti New Member

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    Maybe so, but yours was a good post nonetheless...

    Not only that, I think it is related to the question (though not directly). I would bet most women would be more interested in the closeness & intimacy that leads up to the time of lovemaking, as opposed to the right technique once the session is underway. And, when that intimacy is strong, whatever technique is used is bound to be that much more effective.

    Not too long ago, a study was widely published that insisted sexual foreplay started "in the kitchen" (meaning that women were more likely to get in the mood when they didn't feel overwhelmed with housework). Like, duh! Who needed to do a study to figure that out?


    (If anyone is interested in the study, simply type "Foreplay starts" into Google, and it will suggest "Foreplay starts in the kitchen", and then subsequently yield over 3 million hits. It's not hard to find.)
     
  10. htoad

    htoad Active Member

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  11. nyxx

    nyxx New Member

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    i just kind of feel out the way she reacts. listen to her breatheing, moans, groans, yes', no's... you'll be alright.
     
  12. Flame

    Flame New Member

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    In my mind
    1) Yes, I do, very much. The more sensations everywhere, the better!

    2) I prefer one at a time at first, and then both.

    1) + 2) I love it when the intensity builds. That's to say, he will start with one breast, then move to the other, then both, then goes down on me, then adds one breast again, then the other, then both. Do you see what I mean?

    But I also love the unexpected so I wouldn't want him to do the same thing each time anyway :D
     
  13. Godiva

    Godiva Member

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    it might actually have a different effect on the different occasion.

    For me i think maybe i don't really have a preference. I tend to get much out of any touch on my nipples so, haha. No preference.

    If he's between my legs he hasn't reached up to my breasts, but i don't prefer him too. If he probably tried touching me everywhere, my stomach and etc, i would prefer that, it would make me feel like i couldn't expect what's happening next, which is exciting. :)
     
  14. octavius

    Gold Member

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    My experience is that sometimes to need to "connect" with your partners body during oral and give some attention to her breasts. The way you touch needs to compliment what your doing with your tongue and hands. If you do it right she can "lose herself" in the experience and focus on fantasy and getting into the sexual act.
     
  15. Alwayslearningsex

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    Isuggest multi task and if it's not her thing to tell you, experiment and discover, enjoy the discovering while you are at it.
    Give her oral while playing with her nipples, or put those nipples in your mouth with you use your hand to stimulate her, the free hand on her other breast.
    If she likes her clit played with, a kinky variation is to rub your erection on it with the suitable pressure and rythmn while you play with her breasts.
    Try things, ask her if she likes it, ask her to tell you how it can be better.
    How about you tie her up and blindfold her, you do things and ask her if this is good, better, but don't overwhelm her. Do this spread over a longer period of time. Maybe no need to blindfold, just whisper and have her guide your hand, whisper back. Just ideas here.
    Asking worked for me before.