Fling advice

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Venus69, Jul 23, 2004.

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  1. Venus69

    Venus69 New Member

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    There's a man at my son's school who really does it for me. I have never felt so excited by the thought of anyone. Anyway, I got talking to him and after a while it was obvious we were both thinking the same thing. I sent him an e-mail and he indicated that we would do something about it but when the timing was better. That was now a few weeks ago. Should I make the next move or is the ball in his court? How do I know if he's gone cold on the idea or if he's just not good at making tricky moves under the circumstances (he's married too)? I don't want to look desperate! I have been married 15 years and have only misbehaved once ten years ago so this is not something I would usually do.
     
  2. Frank Grimes

    Frank Grimes New Member

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    First of all, who exactly is this "man at my son's school"? A teacher? Principal? Janitor? Vagrant?

    It seems to me that if it's been a few weeks he has maybe reconsidered. I don't know your situation, or his for that matter, but with you both being married, it doesn't seem like it's worth risking 15 years of marriage for a fling. If I were you, I would just let the situation go, especially if he doesn't pursue it any further.
     
  3. Logger

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    Dear Venus 69,

    Congratulations on keeping things cool, so far.

    If you are thinking of stepping out, you might think about giving your husband some coaching.



    What could H change, to provide more inspiration for you to do more for him? Have you read the LOVE DIET chapter of What Women Want Men to Know? Has your Husband been following those suggestions in the past? How can H imporve? Has H read the LOVE DIET? Some MB posters report substantial improvements in their relationship after H reads the LOVE DIET.

    MB Thread on The Love Diet

    The Love Diet Chapter of WHAT WOMEN WANT MEN TO KNOW by Barbara DeAngelis


    Have you tried to assit H to understand how to imporve his foreplay skills? How is his back massage? Does he have the $31.00 Trigger Wheel for deep relaxation?
    Rollers for self muscle stretching and easy massage of muscles of the other person.

    Muscle Toning and Stretching Aids, and 2 Inch Massage Wheel

    If my eyes are roving, that is a signal for me to pay more attention at home.

    If you want to swing, what about getting H on board with your ideas? have you and your husband ever looked at http://www.swingersboard.com
    If you involve h, then you don't have to sneak around and get him jealous. If you and H are being considerate of each other's jealousy and level of comfort in swinging, then the marriage can still be strong.


    I have been studying Boudaries by Cloud and Townsend. They suggest that since you probably want your spouse to follow some of your boundaries, that it is a good practice to follow reasonable boundaries that your spouse deisres. Once respect for boundaries starts to fall, a domino effect can occur.

    Blessings
     
  4. Venus69

    Venus69 New Member

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    Venus69

    Thanks for the advice
     
  5. jojo_belladona

    jojo_belladona New Member

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    Hi Venus,

    I'd say that it wouldn't hurt to just let this guy know where things stand. It can't hurt to be up front with him even if he is not currently interested.
     
  6. Cwissy

    Cwissy New Member

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    What about your husband?

    Is it fair to cheat on him?

    If he finds out, would it end your marriage? Would it affect your child if it came out in the open? Are you deeply unhappy in your marriage? Is it affecting home life? If so, wouldn't it be better for all if you split up anyway?

    I don't know your situation, but there's a lot to take into consideration before you scratch that itch.
     
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