First time having sex, have a few questions / looking for ideas

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by ewg123, May 5, 2007.

  1. ewg123

    ewg123 New Member

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    Hi
    Last night had sex for the first time, my girlfriend IMO isn't BIG, but theres pleanty of coushin-for-tha-pushin' (which IMO is HOT!)
    I've always I dunno.... I've been jerking off for what, 5 or 6 years probably, and I've always enjoyed practicing self control, and I'd say I can do a pretty good job holding back an orgasm, but I figured that like most people, my first time I'd come real quickly.
    Long story short, after 2 hours of going at it (she even spent 15 mins or so with her hands / mouth after the first hour or so), I had come CLOSE to finishing a few times, but never actually came. She certainly had no problem with this, and from what she said afterwards and how she behaved during, I had no problem making her feel REALLY good, but I just thought it was weird that after all that time, I was unable to come. Any thoughts on this? is this totally strange or does it happen more than I think?

    Also, one thing that sorta seemed to not really be a problem, but rather something that I'm just curious about, is that I "fell out" several times while we were going at it. We started out with her on top, but after a while switched it up to missionary, then back to her on top. I'm average size, ~5 inches maybe a tiny bit more, and as I said earlier, she's a little on the chubby side (huge turn on for me), so its "well padded" down there, which I guess makes it a little more difficult to be really deep in, but hey, it works and we both were really happy. With her on top, it seemed like we couldnt really get any sort of rythem going, and I was falling out fairly often. Missionary we had no problem getting a rythem going, and she seemed to like this position more than her on top, but it just seemed like I was having a hard time staying really close and far in (if that makes sense...). Tossed a pillow under her back which kinda made it better, but what are some other positions which might be good for this situation?
    I'm sure with practice we'll both get a lot better and discover some great ways, but any advice or ideas are greatly appreciated! Thanks!
    :)
     
  2. pirouette

    Gold Member

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    You don't sound like you need any advice. ;)
    You had a great, long experience and it may be unusual not to cum, but certainly not a prerequisite. :)
    Popping out from time to time usually happens if I get too wet and we start losing friction.
     
  3. JS1980

    JS1980 New Member

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    I don't know about the not cumming part. My fiance and I are still training myself to hold back and last longer via the woman on top position. I rarely JO, so I don't know how to hold back that way. Your situation might also be from being nervous during your first time. I know during my first time, even though she rode me and did most of the work, I was still nervous and didn't know what to do. I think it took me about half an hour to finally cum inside her.

    I've fallen out of my fiance every so often. When that happens, I'm either positioned too far up or too far down and a slight position adjustment is all that's needed. My finace is also fluffy, but I can still manage to get deep inside her, especially when she holds her legs high and far apart during missionary.
     
  4. nightrider1964

    nightrider1964 New Member

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    Man don't complain about taking a while to cum! Every mans dream is to be like that. I don't know of many women who honestly enjoy quickies. The rythem will get better the more you do it so PRACTICE PRACTICE PRACTICE!!!!!!!!!
     
  5. cbrmale

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    The slipping out is more likely if you are using condoms, the sensations of sex 'au naturale' are very much different, you can feel the vaginal cuff around your penis and you knew exactly when you are inside and when you are close to not being inside. Fortunately in my younger days, it was pre-aids and all the girls used birth control so we rarely used condoms.

    Not coming may also be a symptom of condoms, they do significantly numb sensations. A couple of suggestions here: use a thinner brand of condom or perhaps polyurethane condoms, change your masturbation practice to a very gentle grip on your penis so you get used to the gentle grasp of the vagina, or if you are both std-free you could consider using another form of birth control.
     
  6. HardRocker

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    Just to add to all of the above; try laying off the jacking some. No pussy has a grip like your right hand, so it may just be something to get used to. Don't psych over it, you'll be fine.
     
  7. lickablesue

    lickablesue New Member

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    yuou sound loving and caring enough, between you im sure you will work out whats best for you, the main thing is that you both enjoy it, how long it takes you to cum is something you work out between you, us women can be fickle sods sometimes we want you to cum qiuck some times not. but once yuo get used to each other yuo will know what she needs if not then ask her. nothing worse than having a man pound away at you for hours when all you wanted was 30 mins. dont be scared to ask her we love a man who cares enough about us to ask what we need, want, or enjoy she will be putty in your hands.

    as for sliding out dont worry it happens to all of us

    keep loving and keep trying you will be a kind lover and thats good.

    love sue
     
  8. nnnnn

    nnnnn New Member

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    Hours? I'll trade with you.
     
  9. WellEndowed

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    my first time i didn't cum either... it took 45 minutes of sex and 45 minutes to an hour of head afterwards to make me finally go.

    i think sometimes guys are just so caught up in the first time moment, that they get so excited to try different positions and different techniques that they aren't paying attention to rhythm or getting mentally aroused as well as physically.
     
  10. ranger12

    ranger12 New Member

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    From behind might be a good position to try,,,but don't worry about the "not finishing" issue,,,it happened to me my first time,,,I never came, and it even happened again with another girl the first time we had sex.
     
  11. socom3mang

    socom3mang New Member

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    i have only gotten head twice, and both times I could not cum.. She went at it for about 30-45 mins and was amazed that I didnt cum... I guess its not a bad thing.
     
  12. JS1980

    JS1980 New Member

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    I'm the same way. I'll stay hard no problem from getting head, but I cannot cum without her or myself jacking off with lube. I need the wetness to get me off, I guess.
     
  13. gladwyn

    gladwyn New Member

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    I too was a first timer some time back. I too was unsure about the way of doing sex for heightened pleasure.
    But today I am a pro. There are various materials available on the net. Forums and blogs. And there are certain sex experts ..
    I have been reading a book lately ...

    SEXUAL MASTERY SYSTEM

    Just check this out .. in case you find it interesting.. it costs some amount... but worth every penny..

    till then..
    Relax and happy searching.

    Gladwyn