First time fingering

Discussion in 'Sexual Foreplay and Techniques' started by TimsTheMan, Nov 30, 2006.

  1. TimsTheMan

    TimsTheMan New Member

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    I'm still a virgin, and a haven't even got the chance to finger my girlfriend yet. I really want to, believe me, and i've read countless strategies and guides on how to do it well. Still, I have a feeling that at the moment of truth when I begin on her, i'm gonna think "shit, I don't recognize any of this..." and end up being a disappointment to her.

    So, for oral -- just gently licking around the entire area, does that feel good or does it bother or tickle some girls? Does it feel weird do actually have a tongue stuck in the vagina? Do you suck on the lips?

    Sorry for all the questions, but I know i'm just gonna end up making out with her pussy while awkwardly licking random parts.

    As for fingering, I know you're supposed to rub the clit (<-- another problem... i'm gonna lose the clit.. I always pictured it as a tiny kind of mini-dick that gets hard and sticks out when she's aroused, located at the top of the pussy, is this correct?), but does it feel good to stroke the entire pussy? And how far should I push my fingers in?

    Thanks for any replies!
     
  2. loveit247

    Gold Member

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    Follow her lead, she will let you know if you are doing it right or wrong, ask her to guide you about what feels good.

    As for the oral thing, you have it right. Check out some of the thread here on how to give oral.
     
  3. kissingworks

    kissingworks New Member

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    Study and learn the parts of her genitalia. Get to know her vulva, glans, shaft, and hood of her clit, and labia minor and major. Take the opportunity while giving oral sex to explore her visually so you know your way around. When you start with the finger(s), watch her face for feedback and ask her if what you're doing is good. Let her help you put your finger in the right place. Stuff inside counts too. (the G-spot) Work together.
     
  4. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

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    It's not like a recipe where there is a total right and wrong way Tim.

    Fingering is pretty much just make stuff up as you go. Slide 2 fingers in and out which draws out her her juices which makes great lube. For the clit just being around it is enough for a most women. In fact sometimes too much pressure or friction directly on the clit isn't the best but every woman is different with that so you have to experiment to see what she likes best.

    With oral there can be lots of action around and on the clit because your saliva is great lube to keeps the friction down. Same thing with oral just mix stuff up and experiment and have fun and hang around the clit most of the time. You can start out with the lips but once I get up near the top by the clit I usually stay close to home until she cums ;) And adding fingers inside her while doing oral is great to give her 2 feelings at once.

    I agree with others, just watch her reactions and if she likes it keep doing it and mix things up for variety ;)
     
  5. JuicyB

    JuicyB New Member

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    The structure down there varies A LOT from girl to girl. Some clits and labia minor are so petit they are barely noticable. Others are long and floppy, with the clit like a "little dick" as you said. I recommend a wash up just before starting. My greatest suggestion would be to relax, explore, communicate with her as you do, and above all, have fun!
     
  6. Dreama

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    Why not ask her what feels good when you are in action. Try something and as her how it feels. Effective communication is the only 100% sure way to get it right.
     
  7. cbrmale

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    Having performed oral on a lot of women, there certainly isn't a one approach that fits all, but with experience I worked out a way to start and then how to follow my partner's response. With oral I lightly start on her entire genitals to get her wet and aroused for a minute or two, licking the entire area from lips to the side of her clit. Then I move to her clit and pretty much stay there, rubbing it from one side while fingering her and following her body language.

    One thing that is important to know is that women are much more sensitive than men, some more than others, so it is important to start lightly with a relaxed and not stiff tongue. You certainly go much more lightly than you would wish your penis to be stimulated. With either fingering or oral, don't go too hard to early, but feel your way with both the places she wishes to be touched and the way she wishes you to touch her. If she isn't reacting, you may be too light, if she pulls away or squirms, you are too heavy or touching the wrong spot, if she pushes against you, go heavier, if she is moaning delicately DON'T CHANGE A THING.

    Oral in particular takes time, with experience some women get to orgasm in four or five minutes, but some take a lot longer. Don't despair, if she's enjoying what you are doing, just relax and go with the flow. You can always have a drink and relax your tongue when it's all over and she's all blissed out.

    All the above comes from experience, actually I learned what to do by asking different girls if they masturbated, and then got them to briefly show me how they masturbated, where they touched themselves and how hard. I then duplicated that with my fingers and later oral. Now after many decades and many lovers, I can take a new partner to orgasm without too much trouble, but truly that is how I started.
     
  8. golferzach

    golferzach New Member

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    You'll figure it out as you go, just don't be too rough at first.
     
  9. hotstuff6900

    hotstuff6900 New Member

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    When you are fingering her she will let you know where to stop. When she moan and yells very heavily you are there. Just go in and push as soon as you get into her and push up as you slid your finger down slowly. When it falls into her hole, pull up and rub her pubic bone very fast. Thats how I like it.
     
  10. mrmanguy2

    mrmanguy2 New Member

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    lol I remember feeling the exact same way. You have to get to know what your gf likes but for mine, I always get my fingers wet from her mouth or her pussy, after kissing up and down her body and running my fingers across her neck. For either eating her out or fingering, the inner thighs are always dynamite places to tease her, work closely towards her clit...when you know she's finally ready for your fingers or mouth, the whole area will be sensitive, and you wont have to worry so much on finding the clit. Just look at your gf and listen to her reactions. I didn't know jack shit about a girls clit or anything else either but from reading stuff here and listening to comments on SF my gf was amazed that I had not done it before.