English to be made official EU language..

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Puss_in_boots, Jun 28, 2006.

  1. Puss_in_boots

    Puss_in_boots Adminatrix
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2006
    Messages:
    6,443
    Likes Received:
    13
    Gender:
    Female
    Haha...not yet anyway. Someone posted this in another forum and the English teacher in me thought it was hilarious. It must have started out as an email forward:

    European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
    As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".



    In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy.

    The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

    There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

    In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

    Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

    Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

    By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

    During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.

    Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

    Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.

    If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.
     
  2. AnonymousOne

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2006
    Messages:
    5,845
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Fucking frenchies ...
     
  3. blue

    blue New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 17, 2006
    Messages:
    80
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    This is hilarious!!!! :rofl
     
  4. SpanishPrisoner

    SpanishPrisoner New Member

    Joined:
    May 23, 2003
    Messages:
    221
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Switzerland
    you know the weird thing is even tho I understood the words I soon started to talk like a gangsta rapper or those with heavy accents. horrible!:phat