Emotions.

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Animularisen, Nov 12, 2007.

  1. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

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    So, recently I had a very bad row with my boyfriend which I'm not too fussed about as its about the 3rd one in a year lol quite healthy. But this certain one actually broke my heart/or at least scratched it as i couldn't breath for a while and my chest was aching... but when that went away i was just completely numb to everything... When we met up the Saturday afterwards, even tho i was getting hugs and sorry about it, I felt nothing and just as i describe numb..

    I was just wondering if anyone else had felt that numb feeling... I got it again today when he told me he lost his engagement bracelet usually I would cry and yell and get angry but I just felt let down and then went numb and just let it drop.

    I'm confused why I've started feeling like this tbh.:uhh:
     
  2. Barbwire

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    Maybe you are maturing and learning not to sweat the small stuff...to let things go and move on. ???
     
  3. AnonymousOne

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    Yeah I get that feeling, hell and I'm not even seeing anyone. Mind-killing numbness is dangerous though, try not to let it get the best of you.

    It's hard when people that are such a big part of your life hurt you, it can leave you feeling exceptionally vulnerable and injured. I refer to this as Date shock not too dissimilar from shell shock.
     
  4. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

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    mind killing numbness lol... When i have it, I have it slightly now but I'm just coming out of it, I just don't care about anything, I don't care the fact my boyfriend loves me or is sorry, I stare into space or do things I never really do (e.g. search for things, clean under the bed, walk around for no reason)
     
  5. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

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    Maybe, it hurt me alot but it didn't hurt me like emotionally and I just choose not to speak to him for a few minutes then I said, lets forget it ok? We'll do something about it later coz I'm not up to it atm....
    Then I left and went to clean the kitchen... It's just even when hes with me when i get into tht state, he says its like i'm not there as i stare into nothing and reply rarely.
     
  6. AnonymousOne

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    A wise man once said: "Apathy can be lethal."
     
  7. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

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    I don't know what apathy is btw... but is it like them people who disconnect from the world after a death or a life changing avent!?
     
  8. AnonymousOne

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    Ahem:

    I give you ... THE DICTIONARY: Apathy
     
  9. Morgan

    Morgan New Member

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    Well, I'm no psychologist, but it sounds like it may be a defense mechanism. To state the obvious: pain hurts. Your numbness may just be a reaction to the emotional pain you felt from the argument. You can't bear the thought of enduring this pain for days on end, so you shut yourself off from feeling things.

    I don't think I'd view it as a serious problem, unless it were happening chronically. Or perhaps if we were talking about something extremely traumatic, in which case the numbness would be a reaction to deep psychological scarring, which you would want to see a therapist about. I myself went through a terrible experience as a child, and I was very numb and anti-social for most of my early teens. It wasn't until I went through a couple years of counseling that I was able to come alive and feel things again.

    I think it's just something the mind does for some people. Like the way your immune system creates a fever to fight off certain infections and diseases. Sometimes the mind goes numb asa means of dealing with stuff. You had a bad fight. It sucked. You don't want to hurt for days on end. So you feel a little numb from it. It's probably nothing to be overly concerned about. You'll come out of it.
     
  10. Animularisen

    Animularisen New Member

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    I'm not too concerned its just never happened to me before... I went numb after my foster father died when I was 14/15 and i don't think its because of my past as i've seen a councilor before and she said one thing about me, I'm the most surprising person she's ever met because after everything thats happened to me/I've been through i smile about it and apart from shaking when i talk about it, seems to have come completely with terms with it by myself. I know I don't like emotional pain, its what I would describe as the worse pain ever... and when we had the row, i felt like i had my heart broken but when we had sorted it all out... instead of feeling happy and relaxed, i just felt numb and i've been that way since Friday when the row happened and i snapped outta it a bit saturday night when he was with me but today went back into it... and I was just wondering what it actually was... the feeling of being numb

    I prefer it to emotional pain tho.
    I might of rambled there... sorry!
     
  11. Bluesy

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    Superbly said :tup Emotional numbness is a defense mechanism. The mind has a multitude of ways of protecting itself. We think we're 100% in control of our thought processes because consciousness creates that illusion; fact is, our mind is actually doing its own thinking on a level we're never aware of. That's why psychologists can be so helpful...they know how to get in touch with the part of our mind that doesn't share its thoughts with us (those subconscious thoughts have such a profound impact on our mental well-being).

    Defense mechanisms are the mind's very clumsy attempt at preventing a break-down. It's like coming across an accident victim who's very near and dear to you, and the best you can do is apply pressure to the wound until the medics show up. They're not really effective in the long-run. But I digress...Like Morgan has said, it's probably nothing to worry about. But if you find it happening again and again, then you might want to seek out the guidance of a "medic" to help you learn how to deal with those emotions more effectively.