dominance

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by rmoe, Mar 4, 2007.

  1. rmoe

    rmoe New Member

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    my girlfriend wants me to be more dominant sexually...but i'm not too sure how, any advice?

    also, who do you prefer to be dominant, the guy or the girl?
     
  2. SexyScorp

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    not sure how....?

    do you mean how you feel about it....as in whether you want to be or not...

    I mean you could act out the role of the dominant one, but it would probably only work if it is what you really want to do?

    i like to be dominant....it is something I have a natural propensity for...

    the powerfully sexual woman....not all men are up for it...

    ironically its only the strongest of men that can allow a woman to dominate him sexually.....so ultimately there will be a struggle as to who will end up dominating....
     
  3. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    Well i think i have said that i am submissive sexualy to women , a few times in other related topics :p
    Like you say Sexy , nothing quite like a woman who eminates power to me at least...although i can take control if the need arises :)

    Im not exactly sure if your meaning you dont know how to be dominant because you have never done this before....There are females such as Sexy who will know far more on this than i so ill leave this to her .....:)

    But perhaps some subject material could also help you...for instance something like this maybe....

    Different Loving: The World of Sexual Dominance and Submission
    by William Brame (Author), Gloria Brame (Author) ( A paperback edition book, just as an example )
     
  4. Barbwire

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    This is an interesting thread and very topical to me. I have always had a fantasy of being completely dominated by a man in bed, but seem to always hook up with men that are not into playing that role. Finally, after years of trying to get my hubby to be more aggressive, just last week, for the first time he actually grabbed me by the wrists and pulled me into the bedroom. Ok, I know it's not much, but it's a start, right?

    I guess there are varying degrees of dominance, I am not asking for much, just maybe to be made to feel like "the weaker sex" once in a while. ;)
     
  5. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    Rmoe
    If I read you correctly, She simply wants you to be a man.
    And instigate sex and the way its done.
    And it has nothing to with dragging out the whips and cuffs.
    Most Women do not want to lead and are a little shy
    about telling you what Her sexual needs are, You should know that.
    and proceed to do the things that She likes to do without
    Her having to ask you. And of course lead Her down Avenues
    that She has not explored so She can find what She
    does like without Her having to seem forward.

    Hiker:sf
     
  6. SexyScorp

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    Some men have a natural propensity for being dominated by a woman.....

    "You should know that" doesnt come into it.....and he is ALREADY a man...being dominant does not equal masculinity....not in my eyes anyway....

    Some of the most gentlest of men I have met are the most masculine......

    Maybe this gentleman prefers to be lead.....???
     
  7. TearyGirl47

    TearyGirl47 New Member

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    Well you say she wants you to be MORE dominant. What are you doing now? I mean if you are already innitiating sex and smacking her butt a little more dominant means bring on the whips. But if she is instigating everything, more dominant means instigate sex and stuff.

    If you feel that she's getting into the "Kinky" aspect of dominance try working into it a little. Pull her hair a little while she's giving you head. (assuming she gives you head). Ladies, you all know what I'm talking about when a guy twines his fingers in your hair and kinda directs your movements. It doesn't hurt but it makes you feel as though he's taking a little control. (I love that so much!)

    There's a lot of grey area in "more dominant" so I'm affraid you'll have to be a little more specific before anyone can advise you.
     
  8. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

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    You said that just fine TearyGirl, He has not been back to say or clarify just what he was talking about, But my take was the same as yours.
    he needs to be a man and lead not follow.:sf

    Hiker
     
  9. SexyScorp

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    'he needs to be a man and lead not follow"

    hahahaha....which century are we living in...

    That is so black and white that a man should lead not follow....and it puts HUGE pressure on men who are submissive....I dare say there could be a couple here who would read this and feel somewhat insulted..

    aaahhh come on we aint living in the days of cavemen where they used to drag their women around by the hair....

    in case you didnt realise it we are living in times where women are becoming EMPOWERED....

    And Hiker, didnt anyone ever tell you that it is only the STRONGEST of men that can surrender to a woman...i found that out a long time ago...

    Its sounds a bit of a paradox i know.....but its true.....:)
     
  10. NaughtyKnickers

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    I think the original question Hiker responded to was that this guys' SO wishes him to be more dominant.
    I thought TearyGirl and Hiker hit it on spot, given the context of that question.

    Balance is good as you've said, Scorp, but the nature of rmoe's question which Hiker and TearGirl addressed revolved around how he could become more dominant.

    I would have answered the same way... :shrug
     
  11. SexyScorp

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    i still find the "needs to be a man" comment quite offensive....and a little derogatory...

    Different opinions....different people, I suppose.

    Carry on guys........

    Oh yeah and I didnt have a problem with what Tearygirl said, she gave good advice!!
     
  12. lovelysu

    lovelysu New Member

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    not sure yaar
     
  13. kora

    kora New Member

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    She wants you to be domintant..she wants to feel your man power..she wants to be raped. I am sure she will like you pull her hair..fuck her hard, change positions when you want and how you want..without asking her opinion. Tie her arms to the bed, bite her ears, her butt..another words fuck her like an animal
     
  14. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    Well im all man...all 6'4 an 200lb of me, but im submissve mainly...(Not subbmisive to any guy though, just to the female im in love with,but i do know how to take control when needed )
    Just because a guy is more submissive doesnt mean he is A MAN ,like sexy said we are different in ways,
    But to me being gruff and putting on a persona of being the ALPHA male, id much prefer to puke my guts up before becomming the alpha male.

    I prefer to be able to love someone else far more than i love myself...

    Alpha males i have come across tend to love themsleves far more than they could their partners.

    Just incase theirs confussion here


    Gentleness does not equal weakness
    submissive male does not equal sissy man
     
  15. cbrmale

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    I read the 'needs to be a man' and nearly choked. Never mind.

    I am naturally dominant in a tactile way, guiding and nudging rather than pushing. This is me in life as well as sex. When I have been with dominating partners, it becomes mutual dominators, I'll let a partner dominate me for a bit, and then I'll take over.

    My wife is naturally submissive, but I have asked her to dominate some of the time, and given her suggestions 'you should do this now' and then moaned and groaned to let her know how much I enjoyed her pinning my arms and taking me in her mouth or whatever I suggested. Quickly she found this was fun, so our sex has moved to me being dominate the majority of the time, and her some of the time, which works for us.

    I can't think of a way of telling a man to dominate during sex, because such a thing is ingrained into me, as much as my eyes are blue. All I can say is if you are like my wife, you WILL get fun out of the changed dynamic, and your girl will get fun out of it to.

    Give it a go, get on top of the situation, and read her body language to see how much she is enjoying your new style. Go with your instincts, and read her response if it is working, and try not to feel self-concious. Taking charge is good fun, and once you do it a couple of times, you'll want to do it more.
     
  16. barbie

    barbie New Member

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    This thing of someone wanting you to be dominate
    and you wanting to be dominate is a whole different thing.
    You are or you are not,don't matter what one person wants.
    You need to be yourself.