Doesn't feel good

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Darkgift, Jun 10, 2007.

  1. Darkgift

    Darkgift New Member

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    My girlfriend was a virgin when I met her, but we have had sex quite a few times now and it isn't feeling good for her. She can orgasm when I use my fingers or do oral but when we have sex it doesn't feel good for her at all. She says it hurts when I first put it in but then after that she can't feel it. The doctor told her it may have been a lubrication problem so we tried lubrication only to find it did nothing. My penis is 8 inches long and 5 1/2 inches in circumference. I say this because I am wondering if I am too small or too big. I thought that eventually the girl should stretch so that it doesn't hurt but it is still tight when I put it in. I don't know what to do because it is really important to me that it feels good for her. I can't get really excited about sex with her because it doesn't feel good to her. I can't orgasm either because I feel like an idiot being on top of her and having her just lay there and not even breath hard. Other girls I have been with and still talk to claim that sex with me was great, even the bitter ones, so I know it isn't a normal occurance. I am getting really worried that sex will never feel good for her and this is a BIG problem for me. I am wondering if anyone has had this problem and whether anyone can offer any suggestions.
     
  2. white_flower

    white_flower Member

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    :( Not a nice story to read fellow...

    wel give it another try..I mean you can ask the dokter another time ?

    Is she worried about your reactions ? If she is ...she is trying her best for you to and it is not that smooth ride yet.

    If she is not honestly worried about if for you or the relation ship you might want to give her a few months (rememeber : love is a broader thing than sex)

    In the long term you loose your happiness because you are still sith her, and sure its a pity for her too. But you should also not been lost in the long term,,,
     
  3. longnstrong

    longnstrong New Member

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    Try letting her get on top and use some KY. Allot of things work better with lube, there is no such thing as too much lube.
     
  4. LA_20

    LA_20 New Member

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    If it was uncomfortable the first few times could she be tensing unconsciously? If she's tense then she obviously cant enjoy herself/
     
  5. Nettle

    Nettle Member

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    My first few times were nothing special... it takes time to get used to it and to enjoy it to the full.

    Lube is good... very good.

    Also make sure she is really turned on before you enter her, maybe right after she has orgasmed.

    What turns her on the most? Get her as excited and lubed up as possible, she needs to be relaxed and enjoying herself.

    I hope things improve soon. :)
     
  6. Darkgift

    Darkgift New Member

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    I give her at least two orgasms before entering her and we do use lube. I asked her to go on top but she really doesn't want to for some reason. I don't think she is tense because even without lube she is very wet. She also daydreams about sex and wants it, but when it comes to actually doing things she says it doesn't feel good. She likes everything else but she does say she thinks I am too big right now. I am wondering if she'll stretch or whether I should somehow shrink it (jk about the last part). My question is, should a girl stretch to fit or am I falsly hoping? And could this be a lack of sensetivity, because she said she doesn't really feel it all that much when I put my fingers inside her. I don't know what the hell I am doing wrong because with ex girlfriends I have been able to make them achieve upwards of ten orgasms through sex. I can make her achieve that many through oral and using my fingers but not sex.
     
  7. naughtynid81

    naughtynid81 New Member

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    u can always try anal too.
     
  8. aquaman

    aquaman New Member

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    has she maybe had a bad experience with intercourse in the past that could be affecting her at a subconscious level? It might be worth it to hash it out with her to find out!
    best of luck
    Cheers~!
     
  9. Darkgift

    Darkgift New Member

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    She hasn't had any bad experience with sex. She was a virgin when I met her. I asked her to go on top, but she says she isn't ready for this. When I tried to get her to explain she got really shy and told me that she just doesn't feel comfortable talking to me about it. I told her that it is important to me that we talk about this and she started acting sad and got really quiet. She then told me she had to go and didn't want to talk anymore. I asked her if anyone hurt her sexually before but she says this never happened and that she is just shy. I don't understand because she told me she was ready for sex, but it seems appearent that she isn't. She is 19 about to turn 20 so it seemed logical that she was ready when she told me she was. Now I don't know what to do and I feel like crap. Having a partner who is comfortable talking about sex is very important to me. When I tell her this she just gets upset and says she isn't good enough or something and that I should find someone better. I don't understand this at all.
     
  10. heelfetish

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    I think that sums it up nicely. It sounds to me like she just isn't ready for what she's getting into. The face that she's a virgin and you aren't may be putting additional emotional pressure on her as well. My suggestion would be to try to talk about it, or suggest you both wait a while longer before trying again. I really hope things improve for you both. :ugh
     
  11. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

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    Well perhaps because she was a virgin before you two had sex, the shear size of you may be the problem..that could be why it hurts her.

    Long soak together in a bath bubble bath playing with each other ( have some food cooking for the both of you whilst your in the bath ) have some grub together, after she has relaxed from the food, somenhugging and kissing hands moving over her body, perhaps giving her an all over body massage with scented massage oils,
    Then ( change roles if she wishes to give you one( massage that is hehe) and let things escalate into foreplay , making sure each and every inch of her body is being kissed licked sucked and teased...(leaving her breasts and vagina till last) hopfuly she will be extremly relaxed and pretty aroused, then using fingers hands your breath and your tongue and lips tease her breasts and vagina....untill she is squirming and having soaking sessions below, after that im sure you two will know exactly what to do, ( the idea is to get her so aroused and her body begging for penitration) that she will be able to take what you have slowly at first without any pain or problem..

    ( Just an idea imo )
     
  12. aquaman

    aquaman New Member

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    if she is cool with it, throw watching a porn into kronnies mix and just take it slow, talking about what the two of you are watching.