Dilemma

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Hot_girl, Mar 14, 2007.

  1. Hot_girl

    Hot_girl New Member

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    I like this guy at work so much. The thing he is not at my department but at my friend and I see him daily. My friend flirt with him and he flirt back but iam too shy to flirt with him because I do not want anyone to find out anything going on between the two of us if anything ever does. The guy is quite hot and by his flirt I can tell he know how to please a women. Recently another girl at wok find out that I like him and even though she has a boy friend she flirt with him so much, the guy was so confused today and said what is going on. so the dilemma out of the 3 girls me and my friend and the other girl, iam the only one who does not flirt with him but I like him so much and would like to have fun with him, I know he will be up to no string attached relation but how do I do it without work mate realising anything!!!
     
  2. jaguar

    jaguar New Member

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    Gossip and rumors run rapid at work. You need to get him alone in private and tell him, Man! I wish we didn't work together or I'd ask you out! And NO WAY could I let any of our other co-workers know, I'd be afraid of maybe getting fired. If he is interested, he will have the correct reply. Then take it from there.
     
  3. Adramalech

    Adramalech New Member

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    Relationships at work can put a serious dent in your future. Especially if it's a professional job. Higher ups WILL hear about it and in the end, can cause your termination. But at the same time, i've seen it work. My roomates GF works where he works and they have no issues. So it really depends on your job. Retail jobs it's easier to get away with it as opposed to an office job. I guess it's really a toss up. They both have their share of pros and cons and I can't speak from experience, so I won't try to act like I have done it. But I do know what it can do if it goes downhill.
     
  4. Brad

    Brad New Member

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    Hot Girl

    Honestly I'd not worry a jot about the other two girls.

    If you want to pull him, focus on your own time with him and make it count.

    Ensure that he gets to know you.

    If he is good at flirting, you'll soon get the measure of the guy and whether he really likes you.

    Just on work relationships, I hear what the others have said. But honestly within our UK office environment, relationships between our staff are common place. Fortunately for those involved our key managment doesn't have any issue with it. It is part of life and as long as the job gets done, no one cares.
     
  5. Hot_girl

    Hot_girl New Member

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    Thanks all for the replies just to make sure nobody misunderstood what I meant. Iam not worried about work relation, it is not against my work policy, I just do not want rumours about my sexual relations gossiped about, I know he is a gentleman and will keep it secret if we go out. It just I find it hard to break the ice and, because I do not work with him I find it hard to flirt. My friend can back off if I ask her too, he knows she is only talk but I would actually take it further. The other girl love attention and she is only doing it for that and that giving him mix messages of why she is acting that way. The funny thing is I do not think iam shy but I like him a lot and find it hard to say anything to him. My friend promised me to get him out with us and once I drink a bit I will be relaxed to flirt. Iam also scared of rejection, it might be a shock to him the one does not flirt is serious about him lol
     
  6. Dreama

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    I understand. I hate people who are nosy about my life. If I want someone to know something personal, I'll tell em'. I can appreciate where you are coming from. Hope that everything works out.
     
  7. Brad

    Brad New Member

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    Hi again Hot girl

    I can so much relate to your situation. Let me explain by way of a little true romantic story as to how I found my lovely wife well over a decade ago:

    In my late teen years I was quite a popular guy with the office girls. There was plenty of flirting and I loved it. Though some of the girls were just plain teasers.

    My (now) wife was often keen to be in with the group, but she later told me that she was always secretly well pissed of that the flirty girls that got the attention that she wanted from me. I didn’t even cotton on to the fact that she really had the hots for me. I didn’t have a clue.

    She was like in the background and definitely shy in a group situation.

    Now, an amazing thing took me by completely by surprise.

    She out of the blue phoned my office one day and said, “It’s my 18th birthday coming up, would you fancy taking me out for a drink?”

    I was totally shell shocked initially lost for words. Then out of pure respect I said, “Sure!”

    At that time, I figured, “That is such a surprise, I have to take it up and see what she’s like one to one. I was intrigued big time. I was actually honoured to be asked out for an 18th birthday one to one.”

    I at the time was just past 21 years old.

    Now at 42, I still treasure so very much that she took that action, as I unexpectedly found the one and only true love in my life.

    If she hadn’t have made that brave first move, I just know we wouldn’t have connected together.
     
  8. SexyScorp

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    Brad that is a great story!!!

    I have always initiated romance in my life.......

    Cant wait around to be asked, cos I always wanted it NOW!!!!!

    LOL

    :)
     
  9. melicious

    melicious The Old Maid
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    I say if you really like this guy, you get the courage. You ask him some time in passing if you can have a moment of his time, when he's free. He'll make time. Then you talk. Don't ever let yourself be in a situation where you will look back on your life and wonder what would have happened if you'd just listened to your heart more. You want him? Go get him. Just do it.

    I found the love of my life by making the first move. My voice shook through our first conversation, my knees knocked, and I felt sick for..... well I still do! LOL. But he said yes. And while the chapter that I'm in right now may not be the happiest, I don't regret going after what my heart wanted.
     
  10. Hot_girl

    Hot_girl New Member

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    What a mess!!!!!! I got so drunk with my friend and went to his house and told him how I feel!!! He said he does not look to me in that way!! I even told him I do not want relation only sex!!! But he said the same. Fuck I feel so embarrassed now!!! How I will show him my face, I was in state to tell him that !!! I feel so rejected is there something wrong with me?? He does not even want a shag relation?? What annoy me the most the way I did it, if I was not drunk I would never have done it. maybe it overwhelmed him the fact that I fancy him then all sudden I want him in bed, whatever is!!! It is now over I know he is not interested. thanks all for the support
     
  11. Adramalech

    Adramalech New Member

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    You could move here to Cali. ;)
     
  12. Hot_girl

    Hot_girl New Member

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    Oh my god!!! I feel so shit now, I met his friend who was in the house yesterday and he told me that I said and did a lot than I thought. I told my guy that I like him and want to shag him now and I will give him blow job now and I touched his dick. Now it explains why he was so wired with me!!!! He thinks I knew what I was doing, because I took him in private to say this. I feel really bad about it and when I text him in the morning I said I was not sorry to what I said but the way, now that I know the full extent of my action I feel really down and awkward. It also explains why he did not reply to any of my texts saying it was ok.
     
  13. Brad

    Brad New Member

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    Hot girl

    Try not to feel too shit.

    Put it down to experience.

    And next time, avoid drinking too much as it often yields such events.
     
  14. Jill_c

    Jill_c New Member

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    drinking can give you some courage, but often perhaps to much courage.

    I have to agree with Brad. We all have done silly things when we are drunk, just part of growing up in most cases. Just have to accept it happened, and realise you can move on.
     
  15. smallpackage

    smallpackage New Member

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    There are a lot of guys out there to have sex with. It sounds like that is all you wanted from him. If a woman told me she only wanted to have sex with me, and not a relationship, I would turn her down.

    Another possibility here....do you think he might be gay? I know a couple of gay guys that are always "flirting" with every girl they see.
     
  16. Hot_girl

    Hot_girl New Member

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    Thanks for your reply, I only said I want only sex because I thought he might be scared of relationship, because he said it at work. I really liked him, off course is not love but lust took over when I was drunk. Been gay or have issues could be a reason, because I discussed it with my friend. His friend told me he was smoking weed and I know how weed make people in shit mood, my ex bf use to smoke it and once he has weed he does not like to be disturbed even by flirting with him, he was so moody with it.
     
  17. Hot_girl

    Hot_girl New Member

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    The thing is I never use to be that drunk I do not know what I was doing. I always looked after my friend because I was never that gone. This is the first time I have been like that, obviously I over estimated my limit. The guy is such a fool he can clearly see we are drunk but he offered us drink in his house some shots
     
  18. Hot_girl

    Hot_girl New Member

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    I want to thank everyone for the support, the stress is finally over. I had really shit weekend about the way I will face him. Today is Monday and you know what it means!!! I met him, he was lovely, I was really scared of his reaction but for the first time he came over to where I was sitting and said hello to me and how I was doing with such big smile ( god he has lovely smile). Anyway he could not talk to me much, because people were around but he got a chance to talk to my friend in private, he said he was sorry for the way he behaved and that he was such a dick head but he was not been himself, he thought that we coming around for quite drink but we arrived wasted and he was overwhelmed. My friend said you had quite night until thunder arrived, he said it was nice thunder and he should not act the way he did and ask about me if I was ok.

    Iam so happy of that reaction and I just wonder if I still got a chance!!