Dilemma

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by ccjcool, Mar 11, 2009.

  1. ccjcool

    ccjcool New Member

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    Ok, so those of you who have been around long enough to know me will recall that a while back, moved to texas in late october of last year to be with a young woman whom i fell deeply in love with. Well long story short, that didnt quite last. She went back to her husband that she had been in the process of divorcing. I moved back to CA after things didnt work out and showed no hope of changing. And herein lies the rub.

    We have remained in contact and do love each other still. And now today, she finally said she wants me back. The problem now is that for one, I'm stuck here, and she's stuck there. If she finally divorces him, she has no one to watch the kids while she works. Along with several other problems. But the biggest problem isnt her and her situation...its me.

    Its been long enough that I started to try to move on. I'm not in any other relationships, and I do love her so much... But I've been thinking constantly...am i sure i want to do this? Before she said that she wanted me back...that she was going to do everything that i've been hoping and praying for...I was sure I wanted her. Without a doubt! But suddenly I'm not! This weekend I was hoping I'd actually go out with someone...just as friends, but I was hoping it'd develop into something more eventually. I don't know what to do. I want her back so badly...but I'm scared to take her back now that she's willing. I don't need to get hurt again.

    And at the same time...theres this other girl...the one that I had planned to (technically, still plan to) hang out with this weekend. I want to see where that goes. She's a great gal with 99% less baggage. But at the same time, theres no garantee anything would develop between us.

    So this is what I'm thinking...I still go out this weekend and see what happens. I'll see how I feel (and hopefully get a clue as to how she feels about me...) and decide from there. Continue to move on and continue to search for someone else...or go back to the woman who hurt me, but still love, and pray that I dont get hurt again.

    What would you do in this situation?
     
  2. missyhuggins

    missyhuggins New Member

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    If she loves you and really wants to be with you, she'll be happy to do anything to make you feel secure enough to go back to her.
    Like actually go through with the divorce this time.

    Personally, I wouldn't be moving to her again until she's made the necessary changes she needs to so that you're her number 1 priority in the love department.

    Go out this weekend and enjoy yourself. You're not tied to this wman who has broken your heart in the past.
     
  3. igor

    Gold Member

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    She doesn't sound too stable to me. You are probably lucky to have found a job when you moved back to CA and these days jobs are not easy to find. Do like you said - go out over the weekend, enjoy yourself and see what happens.
     
  4. spicy_latina

    spicy_latina New Member

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    I'll think about it if I were you because I personally think that moving from your home can lead to other problems. Can't she move with you instead? My advise just don't rush things and take your time to think what you will do , she is not the only woman on earth but still if you love her, love without forgiveness its not love some say...