difficult getting a read on my girlfriend about having a threesome

Discussion in 'Sexual Fetishes and Fantasies' started by McJohn, Oct 10, 2013.

  1. McJohn

    McJohn New Member

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    This question is really for the ladies here as I'm trying to get a read on my girlfriends response to a conversation we had about having an mfm threesome.

    Just a little background on us. We've been together for almost two years now and have a really close relationship. She's pretty conservative outside of the bedroom but shares my very strong sex drive. Neither of us have a lot of experience with previous partners as we are both coming off of long marriages and I only had a few sexual relationships prior to her. She has only had sex with her ex-husband and myself.

    About 6 months into our relationship I put a few fingers in her mouth during intercourse. She went absolutely crazy and a few weeks later was expressing her desire to have me in her mouth. This quickly became one of her favorite activities and we both really enjoy it. She will come several times before we even begin intercourse if I work her with my tongue or hands vaginally at the same time.

    Seeing how excited she is with this I slipped out a quick thought I had on if she would enjoy having another man working one end of her while I was working the other. She initially seemed excited at the idea and asked me if I had anyone in mind. At the time I had not put that much thought into this and definitely hadn't started thinking about who I would want to join us, so I said no I didn't.

    We didn't talk about it much for several weeks and while we were cuddling after sex in the truck one day I mentioned having another guy with us at that moment wouldn't be so fun. She agreed with me and we dropped it.

    Well unfortunately this desire seems to keep popping back into my man brain. Several weeks went by and I brought it up again but this time she mentioned some concerns such as not being able to imaging any mans hands on her other than mine.

    At this point I'm wondering what she truly feels. When we are hot in the moment and I'm working her with my hands or tongue and she has me in her mouth she is going absolutely crazy. Do you think her shying away from the idea is her true feelings or is possibly just guarding my feelings? Her asking if I had anyone in mind the first time I brought it up makes me think she would be into it too but she is now shying away after hearing my moment of concern. She said she asked if I had anyone in mind just to see how far I had taken the thought, does this make sense?

    Sorry for the long post but I'm hoping this will give you enough information to tell me what to do. Keep in mind I really would like to try this out but I do not want to lose her over it. Maybe I screwed up my chances in my moment of questioning it myself.....ugh
     
  2. 12barblues

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    You absolutely DID NOT screw it up.... You spoke your true feelings...and you can NEVER go wrong with that ... Simply keep talking honestly with each other and make no decision until you are absolutely sure....slittyfairy( my GF ) and I have been discussing it for years. And the time will come , when its meant to ..
     
  3. Meee

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    It's interesting to me that you think this might be a clue that she wants you and another man at the same time. But what is really happening is she's totally hot in the moment with you. Her whole body is involved with you. A woman can have a whole body experience with one man. She doesn't necessarily want to split that experience into two people.

    That's a nice sentiment. Accept it.
     
  4. alwaystry

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    It does sound like it was an in the moment thing at first. And since then you have talked about it a little so it sounds like she maybe thought about possible pros and cons and is a little concerned. Maybe she is worried that you may use it to say " now I get another woman right? ". Maybe just talking about it to her is hotter than the actual act. Just take it slow
     
  5. McJohn

    McJohn New Member

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    We both had marriages where communication was very poor with our respective ex's. Given that we feel this had a lot to do with the destruction of our marriages we've been very open with each other. I hope this continues as it is a beautiful thing to be able to live with no secrets from each other.
     
  6. McJohn

    McJohn New Member

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    I agree, she is a beautiful woman and I felt all warm and fuzzy when she said this. I would like to be able to move past this thought of mine but am having a tough time doing so.
     
  7. McJohn

    McJohn New Member

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    She does seem to have concerns and honestly so do I. We are growing a beautiful relationship and I'd hate to lose it over this fantasy of mine. I honestly don't have any desires to have another woman as I can't even keep up with her, but I can see where she might think that. I've backed off the direct comments of another guy being with us but we still do a lot of spicy talking/texting and I'm having to refrain from bringing this desire back out into the open. (so much for open communication right)