Differing Sexual Desires

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Deputy Dawg, May 1, 2005.

  1. Deputy Dawg

    Deputy Dawg New Member

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    My girlfriend and I are polar opposites when it comes to sex.

    I am much more sexually experienced than her, despite the fact that I'm five years younger. When we have sex, I know how to make her cum and she loves it. She says she LOVES sex.However, I have to initiate almost everything. I always cum but it's never really earth-shaking.

    We only fuck in the same boring 3 positions b/c thats what she likes. She won't swallow b/c she finds cum disgusting. (She is a med student and says that the fact that its prostate/urine/etc.. it grosses her out) !!! No anal. No sex in public. The list goes on.. Am I being too demanding sexually?

    We've talked about these different sexual wavelengths. She swears she still has libido but she's often too tired or not feeling well. She contracted herpes several years ago from a stupid fling. This was a big obstacle at first, but we've learned to accept it and live with it. That being said, we obviously don't have sex when it's outbreak season. So, she's not holding back b/c she feels uncomfortable about that.

    I am starting to really miss some of my "sexual past-times" with previous partners and I really feel guilty about this. We all know that we can't change others; How can I bring back some of these pasttime practices while staying inside this relationship?

    I'm not looking to turn her into some sexual servant, I would just like some expansion..
     
  2. steph

    steph New Member

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    If you really care about her, go slow. She might just be going through some bad times or something. (or maybe she's 'testing' you) It's not easy to tell. Maybe she really does just like the 3 basic positions.

    To me, you don't sound demanding at all. You just want a little variety. That's healthy.
     
  3. kbate

    kbate New Member

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    You need to do something. If the sex is boring the relationship will be strained. I think you should tell her, sit down, and explain that you would like a more varied sex life, and suggest several things..
    NO Anal... and thre is no reason she should have to swallow to please you.

    but you could try some light bondage, different locations.. outdoors. kitchen table (my favorite), and other thing to spice it up.

    A med student should know that Urine and Prostate fluids are sterile until after they leave the body and are harmless to drink (if disgusting).

    The herpes is a problem but with medication and proper preparation and care it is a minor one, (although you are about 99% likely to get it sooner or later if you remain with her.)