Date Night?

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Flame, May 12, 2011.

  1. Flame

    Flame New Member

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    I often hear people talking about having a regular date night with their spouse and I'm curious. Do you actually go on a date?

    I mean a real date where you spend hours getting ready then all evening at a restaurant or bar then hotel or home for steamy sex? Or does it just mean a quite, romantic evening together at home with sex before bed? Or something else?
     
  2. cbrmale

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    No. It's a date for sex: the night, probably at a certain time, and you both look forward to it. The sex might be more than just sex: it might be candles and massaging one-another and romantic or it might be something different or it might really be just sex. But it is an agreement by a husband and a wife to plan ahead to have sex. It works, especially when you have children but also when you have busy lives.
     
  3. flying_guy

    flying_guy New Member

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    It's not just sex for us. We usually make a whole night of it and look forward to it for days beforehand.

    Lately, the "date nights" have become a common excuse to our friends, in order to enjoy the swingers club without too many questions being asked.

    Generally, a date night should be regarded as any time you can have alone for an extended period and get back to the basics of the relationship - each other.

    Just my 2c
     
  4. MILF_Rider

    MILF_Rider Member

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    Hire a babysitter, go to a movie, hope to get back before 3 hours pay turns into 4... if it's evening, the kids are probably asleep when we get home so hopefully my wife isn't too tired for sex.

    Maybe if we've had a regular sitter for a while she might be able to take the kids somewhere some time, but we're not there yet.. At the moment, hiring a babysitter is out anyway because we had a dip in income due to time off for wife going on a trip and replacing a sewer pipe under the driveway and spending a bunch on electrical work for the house.

    It's time away from 2 kids, they're a team.
     
  5. Flame

    Flame New Member

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    Thanks for all the great responses so far!

    A related question: when you have a date night, do you do what you used to do when you were really dating your spouse? Is the idea that it brings back the spark and excitement of those days, or is it just so that sex or time together doesn't get squeezed out of busy marital life?
     
  6. HardRocker

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    The idea is it's time to remember that your still girlfriend and boyfriend and to get in an environment where you can treat each other that way and remember the flame. And carry that rejuvenated memory with you like a picture in your pocket while the daily grind is happening in between.
     
  7. kj_72

    kj_72 New Member

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    We had "date night" last Sat. We went all out, kids to grandparents for the night, we stayed at a resort, went to a great stakehouse for dinner, got tipsy...but it was all about the sex, 6 times in 20 hours....awesome! But exhausting, and dehydrating!
     
  8. MILF_Rider

    MILF_Rider Member

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    It's too different from when we were dating, and date night would have to be for a week to have enough time for that.

    I forget if I mentioned this, probably not. My wife went on an 8 day trip abroad recently with her mom and oldest sister. Jet lag on return, but the week apart gaver her a break from the kids (and from me and the sexual pressure that comes from the attention she gets from me.) She slept all day, then woke me up around 3 AM and we had sex like we did when we were first dating.

    If that gives you an idea how far removed being married with kids can be from dating. If that's what you're asking :)
     
  9. cbrmale

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    For us it's been that sex doesn't get squeezed out of busy lives. My children were raised African-style, which means they didn't really impede our sex lives once they got beyond dependant baby stage, which is only the first couple of years. African-style is an amazing way of allowing children to have independance with guidance, and it really works! But other things get in the way: business travel, work hours and so on.

    Beyond that, date nights can be simple sex, or more complicated and complete and loving. Sometimes the term date afternoon might be more appropriate: a long Sunday afternoon to take time and enjoy what unfolds. We do meals and movies and things like that followed by sex, but only very rarely.
     
  10. Alwayslearningsex

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    Dating your partner can make a big difference in a relationship, you are not just living together or just parents, so keep the kids out of conversation if possible.
    Ideas for dates are endless but here are a few: a walk, a drive, bike ride, movie, concert, dinner, sex, meeting other couples, camping, expositions, horse back riding, canoe / kayak, it goes on. If you don't know if you will like it, try it, also take turns doing a date for him, for her, or both when the interest is common. Without those dates I would have left my ex sooner than I did as I wanted to keep it, but c'est la vie. You can mix anything together so ypou make it what you want and have fun at it.
     
  11. cbrmale

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    A date night is different to a date, although I agree that going out for dinner, meeting other couples, going for long walks or just doing things together are essential to keep a marriage fresh and invigorated.
     
  12. yaeyae

    yaeyae New Member

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    Date night could be exciting, it not just for married couples but it's for everyone in a longer relationship. We usually use it roll play a different person and meet at a certain spot. If you have a wild imagination, it is a blast. For example, I played a traveler looking for a good time and my parter was my guide. We end up calling in sick and spend a night at BFE. However we don't use it for sex but for romance

    Cheers,
    Yae