Crystal Ball

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by boobjob, Jan 28, 2014.

  1. boobjob

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    relationships are filled with uncertainty. ie. "we are having great sex but will there ever be more than that?" or " we get along great but the sex is so so, I wonder if we will ever really get into a good sexual groove." What do you need to see in the Crystal Ball?

    I will start;

    I need to see that my wife will learn to deal with anxiety and take more time to enjoy life, including sex so that we can grow old together. So I would love to look into the crystal ball and see us as two senior citizens in 69.
     
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  2. HotForHoney

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    I'd like to see there is a future. Not just rush into a relationship and have it go no where. I'm not afraid of getting hurt, just feeling like a fool.
     
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  3. lbushwalker

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    Where will I be this time next year or the next or the next after that?
     
  4. backcheck64

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    You're overthinking it. That's what dating is for and if anything is missing, bail on the relationship. If the sex was so-so, I ended the dating very quickly, if the sex was good, I'd keep the dating going while still looking. Even when I found the perfect combination, we dated 5 yrs to make damn sure.
     
  5. HotForHoney

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    And is your relationship perfect in every way now?

    I didn't say things weren't perfect, still learning about each other.
     
  6. backcheck64

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    Married 26yrs, together 31 and I truly have no complaints. We get along good, very similar views on politics, raising kids, exercise and fitness, we cycle together, kayak together, we cook together, we both have a deep passion for hockey, we both love to travel, we talk before we spend money and it has to be a mutual agreement before we spend, our attention for our kids needs are equal, and the sex has always been and still is very good. I couldn't imagine a better partner for life. And because of that, our kids are doing great, both at the top of their class', both play hockey, my daughter is in the school orchestra and the city symphony, and I think that the fact that my wife and I get along so well and so matched in our views and goals has helped them achieve what they have so far. I knew what I was looking for, and wouldn't compromise. I dated some absolutely smoking hot babes but had no problem dropping them because they didn't "have it all". I dated probably 70 girls, slept with 46 before finding 47. Don't be in a rush, and don't settle. There is a "perfect" someone out there. You may find him/her after two or three, or it could take 100.
     
  7. boobjob

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    I'll take the bait this one on one thing. What did you learn in year 5 that you didn't know in year 4?

    Over the years I have adjusted my original skepticism about your happy marriage.


    I guess my point I'm the thread was exactly on point with "waiting" 5 years. A crystal ball could have shown you earlier that you had 30 good years ahead of you. You used the 5 years as a crystal ball
     
  8. backcheck64

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    I've never believed in marring anyone before dating at least 3 yrs. No one can keep up a charade for that long. When you first start dating, people tend to put their best face forward and are much more likely to do things just to "please" the person they are with. You can choke down food you don't like but the other person does, you can go on an occasional bike ride to make the other person think you like it, do all sorts of things to try to hold onto a person. Keeping it up for years get's very difficult. After no less than two years, you see the real person, how they handle adversity, tempers, spending habits, if they are high maintenance or not, and to see if they actually walk the walk. My wife and I got engaged after 4 yrs, and I was finishing college which put us to the fifth with work and all. So yes, the 5 yrs was my crystal ball. I knew how she reacted, her true feelings and beliefs, I knew her inside and out. Only then can you pretty well be assured the relationship is going to last.
     
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  9. NewGuy85

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    Backcheck i think maybe you overthought things a little haha. All of those things you said you spent 5 years finding out, the personality things, recreation, all of that stuff, thats what you would have used the crystal ball to find out. That was his question. Not to blow up his idf having a crystal ball. We all know thats not possible. But if it was, if you could know immediately what you may have to spend 5 years only to find out that one isnt for you. What would you want to know.

    That being said, i think i like being surprised haha. Aside from some immature perverted things we all wish we could see ahead of time lol, overall part of experiencing life is not knowing whats coming next
     
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  10. backcheck64

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    I've seen women hold a ruse for 2 yrs, then after the wedding turned into bitches from hell. I'm sure some guys do it too. And I said I was satisfied I knew the real her (which in her case was the same from day one) after 3 yrs, school and work added the other 2. I was marrying for life, you have to make sure.
     
  11. HotForHoney

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    I'm not sure the fact that you were together 5 years is the point, I think it's more you were young and had to be in your own a bit too. Perhaps an older couple might be different.

    Either way, it worked for you :)
     
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  12. johnnyangel694u

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    If my sex life doesn't get any better, will I get life in prison or death sentence? Lol
     
  13. boobjob

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    The husband is always the first suspect.