[Ask a Guy] could use advice on fuck buddys drug addiction

Discussion in 'Ask a Guy/Girl' started by luvsmusiccm, Oct 5, 2010.

  1. luvsmusiccm

    luvsmusiccm New Member

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    This a is a guy that I was good friends with for a few years until him and his ex broke up.

    The past few months I haven't seen much of him since his ex broke things off with him so I don't know what to believe. The ex, I'm still friends with and see her occassionally.

    I haven't said anything to her about it because she's still emotional about the breakup and we're friends but not like really close or best friends.

    when things got rocky between him and his ex and eventually went south, we had a short-term fling. It's complicated. He knew I was pretty much a virgin.

    When I saw him recently, I was hoping for us to have a conversation which lasted less than 2 minutes. He was in a hurry. He wanted money and gave him some. He's on a waiting list for drug rehab, that's what I have been told by him.

    I just feel like Im getting taken advantage of....It's one thing if he's busy but we've hardly hung out as friends in the past couple months or talked about anything.
     
  2. igor

    Gold Member

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    If you know he has an addiction, stay away from him!
     
  3. Mittimer

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    If you give him money you're helping him feed his addiction. Stop.
     
  4. HardRocker

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    It sounds like a situation that could end up with bad feelings between you, him and the ex. As an addict, he is going to be focused only on what makes him feel good with little regard for you or anyone else. I would say keep your distance from both of them. And don't give an addict any money that you can't afford to lose.
     
  5. FlirtyChick

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    All of the above, but I repeat....STOP!
     
  6. luvsmusiccm

    luvsmusiccm New Member

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    As much I don't want to, I know its for the best, I'm gonna tell him Im not giving him any more money.
     
  7. Michellesoldman

    Michellesoldman New Member

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    Yeah it's a tough situation that your in, for sure. Some want to label drug addicts as heartless bastards---they aren't. But the drugs are as irresistible to them as anything us non-addicts could ever imagine. So they live a life of being torn between not being able to sustain a habit that is truly killing them and those around them, and trying to maintain their sanity at the same time.

    Needless to say, overcoming a serious addiction like crack, heroin, methadone, methamphetamine, etc....is far harder than most of us can imagine.

    Nonetheless, you cannot, and should not maintain that habit in any way shape or form. And yes, until he is totally discharged from the facility that he enters, you HAVE TO stay away from him. If he gets a hold of some badly tainted "stuff" he may become enraged at any moment. You don't want to be the one he takes that aggression out on.
     
  8. Divzro

    Divzro New Member

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    I have dealt with people with addictions before. All the above is good advice. If he needs help and you WANT to help him then offer to give him a ride or buy him what he needs instead of just giving him money. Be careful, people with addictions tend to do things that would normally be very out of character. Good Luck, hope things turn out.
     
  9. SteveWaste

    SteveWaste New Member

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    Wait... he told you he was on a WAITING LIST for drug rehab?! And you gave him money?!

    My god, at least you weren't under the delusion that you LOANED him money. Please trust me. I have a Psych degree and deal with drug addicts on a daily basis. Sever all contact with this individual and don't get sucked into his downward spiral. You will be used and manipulated and you don't need that in your life. Don't walk, RUN away from this guy and find another one who will love and cherish you .

    PLEASE

    ~Steve
     
  10. wilber

    wilber Member

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    All the above.

    One thing you must understand. Nothing is as important to an addict as the substance he/she is addicted to. If you lose sight of that you will be taken advantage of. That is the nature of an addict. They do not see it as abuse. It is just how they live and how an addict's mind works.