Confusing and Frustrating Sex - A Little Venting

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by pbs, Dec 14, 2011.

  1. pbs

    pbs
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    OK, this is play day #3, and my SO has been on those anti anxiety pills for a month now. Last time (play day #2) I was able to give her several, maybe 10, significant peaks that she called small orgasms, all in a row, one after another, but wasn't able to get her over the top for a big release. Well, today was even more confusing and frustrating because she would pull me in for heavier licking, and a second later she would pull away to avoid it, and then back to pulling me in again. It's almost like she wanted me to lick her and she didn't, both at the same time. I managed to give her maybe 3 good peaks, but still no big release - every time I got close she hit that drug "wall" again that keeps her from climaxing.

    I spent the first 25 years of our lives together cultivating her sexuality, and for the next 10, I had to slow her down and hold her back from cumming too quickly. This suddenly not being able to make her cum at all really sucks.
     
  2. pbs

    pbs
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    Morning after analysis seems to indicate that her entire vulva, and especially her clit, have become hyper-sensitive. I would never have thought that this would be a problem, but the effect is that I cannot maintain contact with her clit long enough to get her even to the brink of an orgasm. Once I get some momentum going, she peaks, hits the drug wall, "resets," and I have to start building all over again. It's almost like being with a different woman.
     
  3. boobjob

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    Maybe try some different positions that build the excitement for her in a different way. Something with a little less clitoral stimulation like spoonining. Play with her breasts and wait till shes ready. She might just need something a little different.
     
  4. pbs

    pbs
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    Thanks, great idea :) If she's going to be responding differently to the things that used to work, maybe I'll put those aside and try something entirely different.
     
  5. Mittimer

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    Have you thought about pushing through that wall? Even when it gets hyper sensitive, just going and going? It may be uncomfortable, wild and even slightly painful but she may get to that big release she's wanting if you give it a try.
     
  6. Alwayslearningsex

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    Try exploring every part of her vagina, I mean EVERY part.This has given me great fun, if I call giving great orgasms to a woman great pleasure to me. Try slow, fast, soft, fast, build it up, go for the ride and not the destination as you may rediscover, maybe things have changed in her as well. I will say I was extremely pleased with taking the time to really caress everywhere. You can go on her clit lightly at the same time once you know her better inside.
     
  7. pbs

    pbs
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    Thanks for the suggestion Mitt, and thinking back, we did that once, long ago when she was on Lexapro. It took all that both of us had to fight our way through to get her over (I thought my tongue was going to fall off), and it's still the biggest release she's ever had. We may have to try that again.

    By the way, it's not her that wants it, it's me. I've never felt anything in my life to compare to the feeling I have when I feel her cum, gently, slowly, and lovingly.
     
    #7 pbs, Dec 14, 2011
    Last edited: Dec 14, 2011