Condoms and butt sex

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by Jigzitta, Feb 7, 2014.

  1. Jigzitta

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    So I have two things to talk about right now. Well I just found out that when me and my boyfriend really do start having sex that he really doesn't fancy condoms and would like to just do it raw. He isn't forcing me, but he says it feels better that way. I really wish that he would wear a condom. Then I would have to get birth control pills if he doesn't so that he won't make me pregnant and there is something about getting pap smear tests down there that scares me. I really don't want to get checked and I never have before. I feel that it could possibly feel worse than having his penis up my vagina. I don't want them to pinch me with their tools and machinery. I'm afraid they'll see something and try to cut it out and anyway I don't want them to pop my cherry before he does. It could happen, you know? Like here where I live for example they make you get one of those tests before they can prescribe those to you. I don't know about where he lives, but it's possible that they would make me have one there too. I am moving there with him soon when he can get things together. As you may have read earlier in some posts that I just have to get away from my controlling mother. It only gets worse everyday. Anyway back on topic so yeah I really don't know what to do about all of this right now and it could be soon that I get up there to LA with him. Plus doesn't birth control pills sometimes fail and get you pregnant anyway or couldn't they possibly make me sick? I'm also really worried about that. Also I only wanna make my boyfriend happy. I mean maybe he would try to wear a condom for me if I really wanted him too. He never actually refused. So anyway right now I'm just trying to do things the way that he likes. Isn't that important to please him sexually as much as possible? Just saying, maybe not. I just need some opinions on a lot of things right now. Is it more about his happiness or mine when it comes to these kind of things?

    Okay and now to the next thing I wanna talk about. It's about having sex in the butt. I mean isn't that going to hurt me? He wants to do it, but I really don't think I'm gonna get anything out of it. No sexual pleasure whatsoever. It just doesn't seem appealing to me, but should I just do it anyway to make him happy and give him a better experience then he ever has before? I mean he's never gotten that kind of sex from a girl before and maybe if I give it to him I'll be better than the last and only girl he has ever had sex with. Lately I'm trying my hardest to better myself than she was. It already hurts my feelings that maybe I won't be good enough. So I wanna be better and let him have what he's never had before. So does butt sex hurt really bad? It just looks like it would and even worse than vaginal sex. I've had my finger up my butt before and it already felt kind of strange and not so pleasing. So what do I do?
     
  2. HotForHoney

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    YOU ARE NOT READY FOR SEX OF ANY KIND. YOU HAVE SO MUCH MISINFORMATION.

    you should get a Pap test. The doc will a swap to collect cells. It will not hurt and don't worry about " popping your cherry".

    do what makes you comfortable, not your bf. If he won't wear a condom, don't have sex.

    There are a lot of nerve endings in the ass - anal sex can feel good. It can also hurt. You have to be relaxed and use lots of lube. But again - you aren't ready for this.

    Did I mention you are not ready for a sexual relationship yet?
     
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  3. ginger

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    someone putting this much pressure on you should be told to wait and they should be happy to do so until your ready...
     
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  4. backcheck64

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    THIS 1000X.
     
    #4 backcheck64, Feb 7, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 7, 2014
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  5. Hot Wheels

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    After you've read this......go back and read it again!
    It's 100% good advice....;)
     
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  6. AGFUNK

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    Seriously not ready for sex and at this age you should have already had a pap smear. My husband and I hate condoms and we still use them because we do not want another child. Hormonal birth control messes with me too much. All birth control can fail. Seriously go to a planned parenthood or something and get info on birth control, pap smears and everything else.
     
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  7. Jigzitta

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    Well alright, but you all don't have to be mean about it. You don't know me. So you shouldn't judge. I just need help on my questions right now that's all.
     
  8. lbushwalker

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    Jig zits, nobody is being mean to you and all here would want you to have the best sexual experience possible but in trying to be so much better than yo BF ex lover you are trying to run before even being able to stand upright. Go slow babe and enjoy rather than rush.
     
  9. Jigzitta

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    I'm 24 years old. I'm old enough for sex. Waaay old! I'm going to be with him where he lives right now and I'll be there soon by next week. So I just wanna be sure of myself before we decide to really get into all of this you know? That's all. I'll make him wear condom then even if he doesn't really want to. That's really what I want and I don't want to have anal sex. Just thought I should. I guess we'll work things out eventually. I'm just trying to get extra information before hand.
     
  10. backcheck64

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    There are many forms of contraceptives, talk to a doctor. My wife was on the pill from age 16 to 29, never used a condom during that period and never even had a scare. After our son was born, we used condoms, and we got our daughter. For disease control, use condoms. For prevention of pregnancy, the pill, IUD, etc. Your ignorance of contraception and sex in general at your age is the reason for the replies, you're not ready for sex. My daughter knows all of the ins and outs at age 15. She's chosen to remain a virgin right now, in fact she doesn't really date. She doesn't like the drama and between maintaining her #1 ranking in a large, competitive high school, her orchestra and symphony, and ice hockey, she's got enough on her plate. Buy my wife and I make sure she knows what she's getting into and what to do if she decides she's ready to get active. Anal sex is a personal choice, sometimes my wife likes it, others, no, and I respect her decision. And if you were athletic at all, you're "cherry" is long gone, everything from horse back riding and cycling to say, ice hockey, will tear the hymen, hence no cherry left.
     
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  11. AGFUNK

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    You are not mentally ready for sex. You need to have the correct info. There's no rush. He's still going to be there whether you have sex right away or not at least that's what you've been telling us. You don't have to do anything you don't want to do even to please your boyfriend. I've been with my husband for four years and we didn't have anal sex until last year. He was patient with me about it.

    Pap smears can be uncomfortable but you still need to get it whether you have sex or not. At this age you should have gotten one already. They make sure you are healthy down there and have no cell changes that can lead to cancer. You can even google all of the info on contraception but you really should talk to a doctor.
     
  12. backcheck64

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    And there's a huge difference between chronological age, physical age, and mental age. According to testing, my 15 yr old daughter has a mental age of a 26yr old. I've seen 30 yr olds with a mental age of 12. Being 24 doesn't mean anything. My wife is 48, but has a physical age of 24....
     
  13. Jigzitta

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    Well we did it already now since I posted this. So yeeeaah!
     
  14. AGFUNK

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    Good for you. Hope you figured out birth control.
     
  15. Jigzitta

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    I'll probably try and look into it soon.
     
  16. AGFUNK

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    Unless you want a child and are prepared for one you should have figured it out before sex. It only takes one time.
     
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  17. Jigzitta

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    I know. Hopefully I'm not pregnant.
     
  18. AGFUNK

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    Was going to send you this in a message but since you turned them off here.

    http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control-4211.htm

    That is a link to planned parenthood and they have all the info on different types of birth control and their effectiveness. If you choose to use condoms there are different kinds. I've found that polyisoprene condoms feel the best. I can feel the latex ones. There's also lambskin. You can message me about this stuff if you want or I can post everything on here. Doesn't make a difference to me.
     
  19. backcheck64

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    The pill was rock solid dependable for us for 15 yrs, condoms....that's why we have our daughter. Good luck with that.
     
  20. AGFUNK

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    I got pregnant on the pill in highschool. Never had a problem with condoms and spermicide.
     
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