Concerned! Need reassurance, advice

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by chocolateandwine, Jan 17, 2011.

  1. chocolateandwine

    chocolateandwine New Member

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    First of all, hi! New here, although I've been browsing the forum for a while to occupy my curiosity. ;D

    Apologize for the awkwardness of diving into such a topic without an extensive introduction, but hey, I need some help. And based on the subjects discussed here, I'm sure this isn't awkward for anyone but me.

    Lost my virginity on Fri. I've done all sorts of other things prior, but hadn't gone all the way until then. I was ready, the experience was good, and it was with someone I trust and care very deeply about. The problem? I'm having the post-act pregnancy paranoia.

    We used condoms. New, stored properly, no breaking. As far as I know, everything went fine with them. I felt weirdly nauseous last night, though. And I can't remember whether I'm supposed to start my period in the next couple days or in a week or so. For whatever reason, I didn't write down when I had my last one.

    I do have an appointment this week to get on a BC pill. And that's what will use as future birth control.

    So, yeah, as the title says, advice? Reassurance? Please? Haha.
     
  2. GreyGoose

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    I think its all in your mind. It will take more then a few days to start "feeling" or seeing signs of being preg
     
  3. DarkJewel

    DarkJewel New Member

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    Hi,I love your screen name Chocolateandwine:)

    I agree with Greygoose,and also,getting pregnant around the time of your period is unlikely.It *can* happen,but is more rare.You are most likely around ovulation and since you used protection,you should really be fine!

    Sometimes just good old PMS can cause nausea too.I had it the other day before I got my period as well.
     
  4. sinner

    sinner New Member

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    You just took a big step in your life. It sounds like you took it thoiughtfully and carefully which is good. Any big step in life can bring on anxiety. Anxiety can cause the physical symptoms you described. Take a deep breath and tell yourself everything is fine. Talk to your boyfriend. Try not to freak him out too but these are feelings you should be able to share with him. Tell him "I know I'm being a little premature but I just feel a little funny". Also remember to tell him how much you enjoyed it, have no regrets and want to do it again. He may or may not be helpful but you should be able to share this as a whole experience. Your feelings just reflect that sex is very serious and sometimes has consequences. Sounds like you are OK.
     
  5. chocolateandwine

    chocolateandwine New Member

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    Thanks for the responses! They were all appreciated.

    I'm generally a very calm, rational person. Even in this situation, new to me though it is, I'm aware that I'm being silly. Either I'm pregnant or I'm not, and most likely I'm not. If I am, I have options, and I'm well-aware of what those are. Guess I just need to vent a little and hear from other people. It cuts my anxiety.

    @ DarkJewel - Yeah, I'm thinking the nausea is related to my period. Usually it happens the night before, though. If I haven't started by the time I see the doc this week about BC, I'll bring it specifically up with her.

    @ sinner - Yes, I am fine. No regrets (except maybe wondering why I couldn't have waited a couple more weeks for further protection by the pill, LOL). But I'm with a fabulous young man who is very concerned about me. He didn't pressure me into this at all, by the way. If anything, I was the instigator. Haha. I'll talk to him as soon as I figure out a way to word all this that won't cause him to stress. He's more of a worrier than I am, I think.

    While I'm here, I'll ask another question: Do most people on the birth control pill use ONLY the pill for pregnancy prevention? Or do they use it in conjunction with other methods. Let's assume STDs aren't a worry, and also assume perfect BC pill use.
     
    #5 chocolateandwine, Jan 17, 2011
    Last edited: Jan 17, 2011
  6. sinner

    sinner New Member

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    Before my wife and I were married we used only the pill except when she thought she missed a day. Then we would use condoms also. You should use condoms unless you are 110% sure you are both STD free.
     
  7. Mittimer

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    First off, welcome to the forums.

    I know how you feel. The first time I lost my virginity when I knew there was no way possible that I was pregnant, I still got paranoid as hell. ESPECIALLY when my period was two days late. (Which mind you, wasn't unnatural at all) It's normal for you to be a little scared, just try to relax.

    Though, if your period continues to be late, I suggest buying an at home pregnancy test and of course, telling your doctor before you even consider being put on birth control.

    As far as using the pill over condoms, I suggest using the condoms for the first couple weeks of being on the pill and then ONLY if you are 110% sure of STD's with your partner, you can talk about only using pill and not condoms.
     
  8. HardRocker

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    We used only the pill for years before deciding to get pregnant. She didn't get pregnant during all of that time.
     
  9. Texas_Red

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    Yeah the pill is as close to 100% sure as you can get without abstaining completely. My first real serious partner and I had lots of sex sans condom once she got on the pill and she never got pregnant. Obviously this is just anecdotal and doesn't guarantee anything, but I think most folks who have knowledge of proper BC pill usage can say pretty much the same.
     
  10. backcheck64

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    I'd relax. If you used the condom properly, you should be fine. We used the pill only for 15yrs and she didn't get pregnant till we wanted to.
     
  11. Flame

    Flame New Member

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    As you used the condoms correctly and they didn't tear, it is almost impossible that you got pregnant.

    If you are nervous or stressed it can easily delay your period, however, so please don't think that being a few days late means that you are pregnant (I was two weeks late once because of a stressful event and I am usually like clockwork).
     
  12. dolphinfan

    dolphinfan New Member

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    the mind can be crazy!! If you are worried and think you are pregnant you can actually be late and not prego. My gf had a scare and she though she was and she finally relaxed and within the next two days her period came. The mind can play some nasty tricks, Plus you are only likely to get pregnant during a 72 hour period, right in the middle of your periods, Plus a condom that doesn't break is really good at stopping pregnancy.
     
  13. chocolateandwine

    chocolateandwine New Member

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    Thanks, everyone.

    I'm trying not to worry too much about it. Haha. I'll have a chat with the doc on Thursday when I go.
     
  14. loveit247

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    You are not preggers. Relax. :)
     
  15. emsemtb

    emsemtb New Member

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    I agree, you shouldnt be preggers. Also, bear in mind that you need to explore all the options of birth control. The reason why the pill works so well is that it is a daily hormone pill, and if you miss one day, it stands a good chance that an imbalance will occur. So explore all the option, IUD, patch and pill, as well as any others out there. Be sure to find the BC that is right for you and will be the most effective for you. Remember to bear in mind your lifestyle and personality when choosing a BC. Like if you are a forgetful person, the pill prolly isnt the best idea, where as an IUD or Depo might be. Remember, as your Doctor all the questions you have, have no inhibition and dont think that the question is too stupid to ask. For us in the medical field, it really is a case of the only stupid question is the unasked one.
     
  16. chocolateandwine

    chocolateandwine New Member

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    Not that this will surprise anyone, but I am (thankfully!) not pregnant. Started my period today, and I can honestly say I've never been this excited about it. Also went to the doc and was prescribed a birth control pill, which I will begin taking tomorrow.

    @ emsemtb - I actually would prefer to get an IUD, but that option is too one-time costly for me. The birth control pill was my second choice, based on many factors. I'll have no problem remembering to take them every day. I'm also low risk for the side effects based on my healthy genetics and lifestyle. My main concern with the pill is anxiety and - forgive me for sounding shallow - weight gain.

    Any thoughts on Microgestin, the brand I'm taking?
     
  17. emsemtb

    emsemtb New Member

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    I have not really heard of the brand...but then again, I am not really that privy to such knowledge base, only because I dont wish to be. I am only a medic, not a OB/GYN or even an OB/GYN aid. The closest I come to OB/GYN is being the son of an OB/GYN nurse. But if your doc put you on Microgestin, remember, your doc thinks that the pros out weigh the cons in your specific case.
     
  18. sinner

    sinner New Member

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    Glad to hear the news. You'll laugh about it someday. Sorry I'm no help either on pill. Its been a long time since wifey needed those. I shoot only blanks now.
     
  19. FlirtyChick

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    This.....
     
  20. Aspen

    Aspen New Member

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    Are you taking 1.5/30 or 1/20? I've heard a lot of different things about it but most women I have talked to either said the side effects were mild or that they was terrible, there's not much of a middle ground. Of course that varies from person to person so it might be alright for you. You might have a bit of spotting for the first few weeks or months but that's normal for low dose hormone birth control.