I have not always been ready for harmoniously handling my arriving home situations. I had started a simlar thread in 05, and some ideas apply from that thread. http://www.sexualforums.com/talk/showthread.php?t=494 Sometimes I have in mind a loving evening, and I allow a disagreement to escalate into an argument, which leaves resentment, that derails lovemaking. So my first approach needs to be ready for the unexpected concerns. I need to first be ready to listen to unexpected difficulties, or problems. I need to avoid expressing my opinions on issues, if that can at all possibly be delayed, and to primarily listen witout commiting to a particualr course of action. I can suggest a time the next day, to discuss preliminary attempts at solutions. Tonight, I can acknowledge the various aspects of the ramifications of the problem. I can begin massaging her back, and scratching her back, in massage strokes. Often, my wife is not in her bste mood, and can feel better, with an increase endorphin release, so I need to work her large muscle groups, to get her muscles to release endorphins, to get my wife feeling good. I need to work her small muscles in her neck to get her to relax tension. I need to get her undressed, get the room warmed up, if needed, and let her hands start to feel like she is in control of my rod. I need to gently start changing her positions for further undressing, and covering with a sheet instead of a blanket. Once I have begun suckling, I can bring out lubricants, without arousing a rejection, of having been presumpuous. For delays, I can simply pump myself for a while, getting my breathing louder, which seems to encompass her energies along her whole body. With my thigh between her legs, to manage position changes, seems to create a coupling of spirits. ..