Closeted bi guys

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Lkmccr, Apr 30, 2017.

  1. niceguylovesit

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    Not necessarily submit (as in dominant - submissive). But with former gf's it was me always doing the work. Once in a very long while, the woman would take charge - but those times were far and few between. I would very much like being on the receiving work, with the other person doing the work, whether man or woman.

    Of course what would be best is that we both do the work during sex, not, "it's your turn to take charge / it's my turn to take charge." Just two people having sex together.
     
  2. MOBiGuy

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    I agree also. It does make sense to want to do this. I haven't had a chance to experience sex with another man. When I think about it, I am topping the other man most of the time, but sometimes I think it would be nice to just be able to let him take charge and let him use me for his own pleasure.
     
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  3. xcane

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    Considering I'm a bi-flexible woman, yes
     
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  4. BeBop

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    Reading the posts on here (and in the other similar threads) and from personal experience offline, I can say that most of the responses here aren't totally out of the normal. Most men who want (or actually seek) a sexual encounter with another man are looking for something purely sexual or are trying to find the intimacy that they aren't getting from their other relationship(s). (Then again, why does anyone seek a relationship if not for one or both of those things?)

    The desire to dominate another man I mostly hear from the "sex-only" ones. The desire to submit to another man I hear mostly from those who want intimacy. Both groups tend to really zero in on a potential same-sex partner's penis size and overall "manliness." All the, "I'm not gay, but I really wanna suck a huuuuuuuge cock!" types or asserting their control and dominance over a man "greater" than they are. It's some weird psychology shit probably. There's also the "forbidden fruit" factor - men interested in a same-sex experience because it's "taboo" or "wrong" or whatever.

    Of all these men, many simply enjoy the fantasy more than the reality (if they even go so far as trying something real). Or they may find they enjoy something like prostate stimulation/anal penetration, but not another man doing it to them (to those, I suggest finding a woman willing to "peg" you or to invest in some toys to use on your own for that purpose).

    I'm, of course, speaking generally here. I can't speak to the specifics of every man who has these thoughts, feelings, and/or urges. Some may very well be bisexual, if a label is required for peace of mind. Honestly, it doesn't matter. Do what feels right for you, be true to and honest with yourself, and be safe. I'm almost reticent to say that last bit because of the negative view so many people have of other-than-heterosexuals being overly promiscuous and risky (note: not the truth).

    Anyway, I think I've rambled enough here. I think I've got my point across. :p
     
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  5. Lovnflman

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    I guess that means I'm desiring intimacy. I have no desire to dominate another man. I want to submit to him, be used for his pleasure both orally and as his bottom. I want his seed inside of me long after he's gone.
     
  6. Lovnflman

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    In your fantasies do you have one particular guy in mind, or just a faceless cock to play with?
     
  7. BeBop

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    Not necessarily - I said, "The desire to submit to another man I hear mostly from those who want intimacy." I by no means meant that all men who are submissive to other men want intimacy over sex from the interaction. I was speaking in generalizations based on what I've read here and experienced in my own life. I don't know the specifics of you, your situation, or your desires.
     
  8. Lovnflman

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    In my fantasy I have one particular guy in mind.....my wife's gay hairstylist. He told my wife that he thought I was good looking and wanted to "gay me up"! My wife suggested I have him do something to my hair that wasn't so conservative. Got my mind racing. He was very hands on during my visit, and gave a great scalp and neck massage. I felt like putty in his hands. After the cut we walked back to the office to settle the bill. Gave him the check and shook hands. He just stared at me for what seemed an eternity, then he kissed me. A light peck in the lips at first, but then a full blown tongue duel. NEVER thought kissing another guy would be so hot. It was freakin HOT. He took me in his arms and held me while kissing me and rubbing his bulge against mine. We r both about 6'1" tall so it lined up perfectly. After about a minute the salon's door chime went off signaling another customer had entered. That ended our little session. What I fantasize about if we had continued is him nudging me to my knees and I service him orally until his seed is in my belly. Then he leads me to his apartment over the salon and he undresses me and himself, lays me back on his bed, and I willingly accept him between my open legs and I to my virgin ass. He literally makes love to me, thrusting, deep kisses, until he stiffens and fills me with his man seed.

    Unfortunately his ex long term bf came back on the scene and they're back together. His bf doesn't want to share him. Believe me, I inquired. He's the only guy that I fantasize about.

    Sorry if this was TMI........it just got me going.
     
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  9. niceguylovesit

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    For me the desire for intimacy is both emotional AND physical.
     
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  10. niceguylovesit

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    I have pretty much rejected the idea of top and bottom. (If someone online has asked me, I snarkily reply "sideways!" Their response to that usually confirms my idea about some men being "sex-only" and not in it for any sort of intimacy.)

    The perfect one would be a mutual encounter, with both of us giving AND getting something equally from the other. In my mind, two men having sex would be the same as a man and woman having sex, maybe more along the lines of "making love." I'm not necessarily saying that in the romantic sense, but how two people physically make love. I'm looking for the emotional intimacy and release, the same way that I am looking for the physical intimacy and release. This feels better to me than the "pounding" that represents most sex between two men.

    I'm also not saying I want a relationship either. That's really more about me. I'm not wanting relationships right now with either men or women. But I would be open to some good sex with a friend, whether they be a man or a woman. For this to work, I think that their needs to be both some degree of friendship, but more than that there needs to be respect between the two.

    EDIT - I wanted to add that I said "perfect" above. I know that this may not be achievable and that I might have to set my sights lower. But I can at least start off at "perfect" and go from there. :rolleyes:
     
    #30 niceguylovesit, Jun 19, 2017
    Last edited: Jun 19, 2017
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  11. MOBiGuy

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    You make some good points in this post. I am actually like this myself. I use the term top more to indicate the person that is the more active one. It would be great to have a mutual encounter that both people involved give and take equally, but it's actually probably rare that this happens outside of a long term relationship.

    It's been years since I have had any sort of sexual contact with another person, and have never done anything with another man. I'm currently not searching for a relationship, but would enjoy having a Friends with Benefits arrangement with another person no matter what sex they are. Just someone to do things with and sometimes be physically intimate with for the human contact that everyone should have.

    I was a member of an adult dating site for a while and was a member of a discussion group for bi and bi curious men. Most of the guys in the group were looking to give oral sex but didn't want to receive it or do anything with anal sex. They also complained that it seemed like no one in the group wanted to receive oral, just give it. There was 3 or 4 of us that were willing to be sucked but also wanted to suck. They actually said that we were in the wrong group and that we should leave. Didn't make any sense to me then, and it still doesn't make sense now.
     
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  12. BeBop

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    For those of you (@niceguylovesit and @MOBiGuy ) who are neither Top nor Bottom, but prefer to go between those two depending on the situation - the term would be that you are a "Switch." :)
     
  13. niceguylovesit

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    Several years ago, I read a book "The Bisexual's Guide to the Universe." There was some discussion in the book about situations like this. Gays and straights said that we were confused and that we should make a decision about which way to go. The book chalked that up to each group feeling threatened, and worrying about their individual causes being undermined by us.

    The group you mentioned above sounds a lot like another group out there, men who like to have sex with men, but don't consider themselves gay. They considered themselves straight. I'm not sure that I want to be in that group. Definitely doesn't feel right.
     
  14. niceguylovesit

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    Thanks for a word for my definition.

    So in a hetero relationship, is when the woman takes charge considered "switch?"
     
  15. SlamminSammy

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    I've never done anything with a guy before, but I do want to try sucking a big cock & receiving a massive facial at least once.
     
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  16. alex93977

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    If she is using a strap-on on you then it's pegging otherwise is femdom I believe
    Correct me if I'm wrong
     
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  17. niceguylovesit

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    Whatever you call it, its hot!
     
  18. BeBop

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    Switch is technically a term from BDSM more than elsewhere - referring to anyone who switches (!!) between being Dom/Domme and being Sub. It doesn't really apply to a "standard" relationship where the woman now and then takes control. I mean, I guess the term could still be applied; I don't really see why not as it is technically accurate (her taking control would be switching from being bottom/sub to being top/domme).

    As Alex said, if she's pegging, tying you up, humiliating, punishing, or some other "alternative" sex activity where she has total dominance and control - that would be Femdom.

    And I could be wrong - I'm not the most well-versed and experienced. I'm an enthusiastic novice. So, if anyone reading this knows more/better than I, feel free to chime in. :D
     
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  19. Cappy_Dick

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  20. BeBop

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    Gotcha - thanks for the correction, Cappy. I knew of that term, as well, but not the appropriate application. :)
     
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