Cheating spouse?

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by 82angelfan, Nov 26, 2004.

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  1. 82angelfan

    82angelfan New Member

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    Anyone ever suspect there spouse of cheating? I uploaded some family pictures from our digital cam on thurs morn to show my mom. Left in the cam were two fifteen second videos. One of a guy in a uniform that could be from my wifes work. and one of a half naked guys torso with shirt pulled up and red sweats and grey boxers pulled down. You can imagine what was in the frame. I don,t own sweats, and I don,t wear underwear (80's thing). I also have a hairy stomach. This guy did not.

    Since I quit drugs, I do not have any close friends. Any addicts will understand why. So I present it to you. Any advice.
    _________________
    It's your world, I just provide the power.
     
  2. krimson

    krimson New Member

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    have you asked her about this set of footage you have found? if so what did she say?
     
  3. Logger

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    Dear 82 Angel Fan,

    Try searching Cheating, unfaithful, indiscretions, trust.

    There is a huge Infidelity section with many threads in marriagebuilders. com.

    When I get the feeling that my wife is starting to stray, I take her to lunch, pick her up after work, find ways to spend more time with her.

    What do you know about the MB 10 Emotional Needs? Which ones are important to your wife? Which ones are you putting the most faith in? Are you using the best mix?

    Any way to improve realtions with her family members? Play cards, watch a game? Help with yard work? Work on a car together?

    Confronting a cheating spouse can get out of hand. You might want to see what problems need fixing, and get started on YOU, then think about a confrontation. You have not provided a list of what you could do better, and that is the place to start.

    Have you read the books and videos by Coud and Townsend on Boundaries? Do a search on this Forum.

    I personally don't trust my own wife, so I avoid contact with friends, so as to avoid getting embarrassed.

    Have you looked in the Marriage section of this forum?

    How are your massage and foreplay techniques?

    What do you know about Wicca? Ever visited mysticwicks. com? What do you know about magic orbs and protection? How do you best utilize religion? Have you ever had her astrology chart done? A comparison chart with you and her? What strengths and weaknesses are revealed?

    Blessings
     
    #3 Logger, Dec 2, 2004
    Last edited: Dec 2, 2004
  4. monteone

    monteone New Member

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    well ill tell you from my dealings with it plainly out once it happes it will happen again my exwhore (wife i mean) cheated once in 2000 then she and i tried to work it out and it SEEMED ok untill 03 then she was doing it all again and at that time i was self employd and bring in at least $1,700 a week take home and bought her any thing and everthing she wanted including the house she chose and then afet all said and done i had a heart attack at age 27 then she was out fucking any thing that moved to be honest with you and i am not( bull shitting) you one bit she was acutally sleeping with a homeless guy that ate and lived of of the local dump in our home town , then she has been with 9 differnt guys in less than a year plus in the long run you will always wonder if you can trust them again to me its just not worth it ....becouse one the trust has been broken its never the same again! unless you think its cool to play pass around with your woman its not advisable by me..... (sorry if i pissed any one off but thats how i feel and how it went down for me so i say fuckem if they cheat take anty thing and every thing you can away from them like i should have done )
     
  5. CLC

    CLC Banned

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    *Removed*
     
  6. Logger

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    Dear Monte One,

    Thanks for sharing. You make the point that 82 Angel Fan, and others who find out about their spouse's indiscretions, have to make a decision. Either to try to work it out, or to give up, and dump the partner.

    The decision to try to work things out is ordinarily partly based upon a prediction of what the partner is going to do in the future. Discontinue indiscretions, continue indescretions, more discreetly, or become increasingly less discreet.

    It is difficult to predict how people will progress worse, or turn better. One concpet I metioned was forgivenss to include reparations and repentance, basically rehabilitation. If the cheating partner is willing to participate in some self-improvement realted to the embarrassment, then there might be a better chance. If perscriptions, alcohol or diagnosed mental illness is involved, then more self-improvement may be needed, to turn the corner.

    My personal belief is that as I try to work things out with my wife, I will become a better lover and partner. As I become a better lover, then if I get dumped, I can find someone else, and have good loving partner habits established. I really don't have a good answer to how foolish I will feel, after trying for some years, to make things work.

    Blessings
     
    #6 Logger, Dec 6, 2004
    Last edited: Dec 6, 2004
  7. sueb

    sueb New Member

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  8. Mittimer

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    Please don't reply to threads that haven't been touched in 6 years.
     
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