Can't get my gf there

Discussion in 'General Sex Discussion' started by Rugbylad09, May 3, 2011.

  1. Rugbylad09

    Rugbylad09 New Member

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    It's quite an embarrassing thing to admit but I can't get my gf to come!! She assures me no one ever has and we ate determined to get her there!! At the
    Moment she is loving it when we use a vibe on her clit while I am inside her. She says it feels absolutely amazing but has to stop as her clit gets too hard an the whole area too sensitive. Is she coming and not realising it? She says she doesn't experience a "peak". Any advice?
     
  2. kj_72

    kj_72 New Member

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    A LONG oral sex session should help IMO. Is she able to fully relax?
     
  3. Rugbylad09

    Rugbylad09 New Member

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    Yeah!! But she doesnt really enjoy oral at all!!
     
  4. collette

    collette Member

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    I didn't enjoy oral either until I figured out that while it felt good it wasn't going anywhere with most guys. I had to learn to be confident enough to tell him to slow down, be softer, etc.

    Also, I had to learn to relax as I tended to be tense. It used to take me a looooong time to come so I was anxious and so self conscious about how long it was taking. Once I let go of that thinking and relaxed, it was so much easier and faster - now I would like to be *teased* so it's not so quick! lol.

    Don't know if you've had this discussion, but can she cum by herself? If so, can she do whatever she does by herself when she's with u, when you're in her, or whatever? That's another thing I do that works :) It's all good.
     
  5. Rugbylad09

    Rugbylad09 New Member

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    she can'yt no, although she doesn't masturbate very often, something which she knows would help. We do see each other a lot though so it doesn't leave a lot of time. She is worried she may be in the 10% of girls that never will. Is this a true stat?
     
  6. andretti

    andretti New Member

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    Sometimes, trying too hard makes the desired outcome even less likely to happen. You want advice? I'd recommend patience.

    As for the stat, and whether or not she's on the unlikely side of the demographical line, you don't mention how old she is. I've met some women who didn't have their first orgasm until their mid-20s, but they climax like crazy now...

    So long as she's enjoying the sensations, just go with the flow, and see what happens...
     
  7. coconutpanda

    coconutpanda New Member

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    I don't think she is.. I had this problem with an ex-partner and I think it's just as vibrators are pretty powerful it's just too much, especially as it's quite a sensitive area.. she might be better off playing around with her fingers first and seeing what feels good.. when she's more used to that sort of sensation then you could maybe start using the vibrator. Trust me, she would know if she orgasmed as its a very powerful feeling. And don't feel bad for not being able to make her- no partner has ever made me either, but don't worry it's pretty normal. Lots of women can only orgasm through stimulation of the clitoris, which regular sex doesn't really provide. I hope that helps...
     
  8. Kermit

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    Well i had the same issue with my wife when we started getting intimate, i would try and try and i felt so bad, til i tried something, i had my finger in her ass, then she came with no issue lol. So the lesson of the story kids is experiment and be patient, find out what drives her over hte edge, some people just need and extra PUSH
     
  9. Ryaan

    Ryaan New Member

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    When your fucking her missionary get low and lean back as far as you can. When your dick slides in and out it should push against the front wall of her vagina which I've been told is pleasurable for a woman for one reason or another.

    I don't know how it works, all I know is it does work (every time for me), and that's all that matters.

    Give it a try and let me know how you did.
     
  10. ply

    ply
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    Try a variety of toys. A small anal plug. Anal stimulation helps a lot of gals get off

    Even a toothbrush upside down on the clit helps
     
  11. Alwayslearningsex

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    Maybe she has other special areas not discovered, not exploited yet, like anal, breasts, some get all soft and mushy and wet from kissing on the neck for example, getting her hotter (friend' GF is like that he says), explore. and give it time, different methods, hard, fast, slow, softly, etc
     
  12. KimRN

    KimRN New Member

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    I agree 100% with Coconutpanda, get her a vibrator. I call it a BOB (boyfriend on batteries). It brings me to orgasm faster, more intense and it lasts longer than when any other. Its great for both clitoral and g-spot for me. You could give her a glass of wine or her favorite cocktail so she can relax before she tries it, that might help also. And while your at the store buying the "BOB" get a porno...'nuf said
     
  13. Jon99

    Jon99 New Member

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    I agree. My wife loves her BOB! and while she is using it-- it frees me up to do other things...like play with her nipples...her clit....her ass....put my penis in her mouth. We've had a lot of fun trying different things! Now I know the best ways to help her get off
     
  14. ulannapod

    ulannapod New Member

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    Try to use any sex toys for her,. i hope it works.
     
  15. pbs

    pbs
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    Another approach which has worked for me is to learn her body language. I think her clit will be the key to success. If she can RELAX and just enjoy the feelings, without any goals, learn how to kiss and lick her clit very, very softly and slowly, and respond to whatever responses you get. If you can make it hard, give her a little LESS stimulation in an effort to increases it's desire to be touched. Maybe insert a finger if she likes it, and ALWAYS be alert to her body's responses. If she can relax into the feelings she's having, just keep giving them to her and be patient, slow, and gentle. Find something that she really likes, and then give her just a little less of it than she wants to increase her desire for it. Rhythm is key to her orgasm. If you find one she responds to, keep doing it - don't change anything. She has to let it happen, she can't make it happen.

    By the way, I think that vibrators may tend to numb things, and may be too intense for a first timer.
     
  16. Lovingmywife

    Lovingmywife New Member

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    Sounds like your spending TOO much time on her clit.. You can't "play" with her clit exclusively.. Explore every inch of her body.. Feel how her body reacts to your touches. In the end, her clit will most likely be the "button" that sets her off, but you have to get her relaxed and fired up before you attack that spot... It is a very sensitive spot and can get uncomfortable quite easily if your not careful. When your "exploring" watch for signs such as deep breathing, or even holding her breath, feel her skin... If it gets tighter or has goosebumps she is getting turned on(more than likely). Keep up you feeling and touching and once and a while run a hand or a tongue over her pussy and across her clit... You'll definitely get a reaction if she's getting hot.... Its difficult for a lot of women to get off during intercourse... My wife has only gotten off in missionary once in her life... I can get her off in "reverse cowboy" every time.. That said, her orgasm from me eating her pussy and such is ALWAYS more powerful.
     
  17. ohgeesh

    ohgeesh New Member

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    Every women is different......the key here is if she can't orgasm on her own she won't be having orgasms with you...imo

    Wild g vibrator works well for my wife, as does her own two fingers, best of luck.