cant ejaculate

Discussion in 'Sex and Relationships' started by broli, Mar 27, 2012.

  1. broli

    broli New Member

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    hello... i am married and i have had intercourse with my wife many times and just cant seem to ejaculate, but if i masturbate i ejaculate fine.. she wants to have a baby so i sometimes thinks is stress any help is appreciated
     
  2. Peteher

    Peteher Member

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    Ok, don't spank your monkey for a few days, dress her up in something slutty, put some porn on, then fuck her from behind. You will blow a big load in her my friend!
     
  3. Kermit

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    I have the same issue so you're not alone my friend
     
  4. Meee

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    Welcome to the forums!

    So, my first question is, she wants a baby--do you? Should I read between the lines and guess that the stress you're feeling is because you aren't as enthusiastic about starting a family as she is?
     
  5. broli

    broli New Member

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    yea she wants a baby so at first i didnt think i was ready but now i do want it.. so i think is just im trying to hard to please and not enjoying myself.. its really fustrating not being able to cum.. someone suggested some therapy.. has anyone been succesful with therapy?
     
  6. Texas_Red

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    Self fulfilling prophecy. You're just compounding stress, making it harder and harder and less likely you'll be able to cum. It's not a job, not work. Sex is enjoyment. The baby will come with time. Relax, have fun with it. Make it kinky/dirty/romantic, whatever you like. If it's not fun and you feel like the pressure is on, you're going to continue having a rough time.
     
  7. 12barblues

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    yep, stress ,pressure of any kind can put the brakes on gettin' off....as soon as you start thinking that you "have to cum"...it'll be the LAST thing you can do....so like the song says...relax, when you wanna cum...
     
  8. somhairle

    somhairle Well-Known Member

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    This may be an issue for some 'professional' advice but some of the suggestions here can help.

    If you can cum when masturbating, have you tried taking it so far by yourself and then letting your wife take over? You don't say if you have ever been able to cum with your wife? If you never have, then it is presumably nothing to do with the baby issue. Have you been able to cum with other women?

    I think you need to focus on whatever makes it easiest for you to cum and bring your wife in on that action. Then bit by bit, you may relax and be able to expand things a bit more.
     
  9. JonJo

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    Think somhairle's question is important - have you been able to cum with other women?

    Got the feeling that somewhere something psychological is at play here and not physical.

    Pretty basic question - how do your thoughts vary when masturbating to when having sex?
     
  10. mikeh

    mikeh New Member

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    As someone with children I will offer this advice. You're better off not ejaculating.[​IMG]
     
  11. broli

    broli New Member

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  12. broli

    broli New Member

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    When I masturbate I like to think about her and think she's talkin dirty to me, while having sex I just think of the moment
     
  13. somhairle

    somhairle Well-Known Member

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    Ask her to get close to you. Try to have her stimulate you while talking erotically to you at the same time. You may find it best if she whispers to you as this may seen similar to your fantasies?
     
  14. xeniadraven

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    ditto what he said :eyes
     
  15. Alwayslearningsex

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    try having sex just for the hell of it, relax, let it go, pay attention to the sensations you experience, WANT them, don't hold back.

    Other ideas are for wife to masturbate or give you oral and when you are about to ejaculate, you'll know where to go and what to do when you ejaculate. Try less masturbation.