Cant cum from oral with gf

Discussion in 'Sexual Foreplay and Techniques' started by anotherguy, Feb 12, 2007.

  1. anotherguy

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2007
    Messages:
    1,081
    Likes Received:
    1,550
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Australia
    Hey basically having problems when the gf of 5yrs gives me oral or i tit fuck her, i can go for over 10minutes and still not feel like im ready to cum. We have tried to discuss it but its not easy to talk about without one of us feeling as if its our fault.

    If we have normal sex everything is fine and im still sexually attracted to her very much, so what is going on. Any tips or help on what could help fix the problem
     
  2. smallpackage

    smallpackage New Member

    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2006
    Messages:
    493
    Likes Received:
    1
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Oregon
    You need to "allow" yourself to cum from oral sex. It is probably all mental. Maybe she could use her hand to "jerk you off" while she gives you head, if she doesn't already do that.

    I had the same problem too....I just finally had to let go and realize that it was ok for me to cum in her mouth :)
     
  3. jimmy dean

    jimmy dean New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2007
    Messages:
    15
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    i dated a girl once and had the same problem. to get me off, she would have to jerk me off kind of slowly (like the previous post said) while keeping her mouth on the very head of my dick and kind of spitting or drooling on it as lubrication. it got me to where i knew i was going to get off and i would tell her. she would go back to giving me head and wouldnt you know, here i came. and she let me go in her mouth everytime. i may be crazy, but i think doing it that way made her feel like she earned it or a reward or something. she really liked it. also, does your girl moan while giving you head? i have found i really like the vibrations that moaning produces on my dick. that really helped me to. just be lucky your getting it man. i just posted my first topic ever about my current girl not going down on me or even touching my dick!!!! do you know how hard IT is (ha ha)talking and thinking about the good old days of blowjobs!?!?!
     
  4. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2007
    Messages:
    4,740
    Likes Received:
    7
    I wouldnt be to worried about not being able to ejaculate after 10 mins.
    Just takes longer meaning hopefully more enjoyment for her as im sure she would enjoy you pleasuring her for more than 10 mins :)
     
  5. anotherguy

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 12, 2007
    Messages:
    1,081
    Likes Received:
    1,550
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Australia
    I wish after around 10mins she starts to complain about lock jaw if she has been giving me head :(
     
  6. rabbit225

    rabbit225 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 4, 2007
    Messages:
    1
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    I had the same problem for ages with an ex. I was treating it as masturbation... but everyone knows when you masturbate you've got your own feel and you know how to cum as and when you want to. What happened to me most of the time is that I just took over and came wherever, which kinda sucked cause then it wasn't head. However we tried this one day and it worked:
    Get some lube. Proper lube. Not some madeup stuff. Sex lube that will slime you up good. Once it's on, get your girl to just perform downward strokes. Not too fast or slow, just quite hard downward strokes and you'll start to feel it feeling different. I'd never done this before and I don't really use lube when I masturbate so I came really good and she didn't have to master it or anything cause it was totally new.

    Give that a go. Wow this is my first comment here. Hey all.
     
  7. Kronnie

    Kronnie Banned

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2007
    Messages:
    4,740
    Likes Received:
    7

    My bad i hadnt known that was why you were asking. :(

    Maybe a way round is for her to pleasure you in other ways , and after a while then start using her lips toung and mouth on you, maybe this would be beeter, as you would be further along this way than if she started wit horal straight away...
    just an idea :)
     
  8. Elvis

    Elvis Member

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2007
    Messages:
    713
    Likes Received:
    2
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Spain
    I jokingly have said to Mrs E over the years, "I'll give you 24 hours to stop" and I guess that she could quite easily manage that, even now.

    Wish I could manage that long!
     
  9. bighiker2003

    bighiker2003 Banned

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2004
    Messages:
    3,754
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Northern Indiana
    Smallpackage said
    .

    That pretty much says it all, Its just a mental
    block and you must "allow Yourself to do it.

    Hiker:sf
     
  10. Joe

    Joe
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2005
    Messages:
    1,681
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Rocky Mountains
    Several here are contending that "you need to 'allow' yourself to cum," and I tend to agree to a point, but it's also possible that the BJs she's giving you just aren't creating enough friction to get you over the top. In the past (when I used to get head regularly) I often had a hard time getting off. My late wife, who gave me my first BJs, gave me head about every day for a year before I finally got off that way. After that first time, she could get me off whenever she wanted to. I think part of it was me letting go, but it was also her technique that involved more use of her hand(s), a firmer grip, and faster motion when I was approaching the peak.

    My wife doesn't give me BJs, but she does give exquisite hand jobs, and I seldom ejaculate from them. She can keep me at the brink for an hour or two and give me several full-body orgasms without ejaculations, just by keeping the rhythm slow and steady, slowing it down or changing the stimulation as she feels the orgasm approaching. (That way we can finish with intercourse.)

    If you want to cum from the BJ, give your partner some direction (faster, harder, etc.), just like you'd like some direction from her when the tables are turned.
     
  11. ninja08hippie

    ninja08hippie Official SF Hugger
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2007
    Messages:
    2,089
    Likes Received:
    36
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Strawberry Fields
    I had a girl who had a hard time getting me to cum, she constantly switched from sucking on it to licking it and then going down to my balls, it felt great, but without the constant 'in and out' kind of motion it was hard to cum. She knew that I wouldn't come that way so she did it until her mouth started to hurt then she used her hands to finish me off.
     
  12. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2006
    Messages:
    815
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    USA
    When I can't cum I tense my legs muscles for a few mins and it always works for me for some reason. Extra pressure or something :lol
     
  13. Mâjagruu

    Mâjagruu New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2007
    Messages:
    4
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Ya i have this prob, Basicly i like to not cum while resevin oral i dunno its my own lil way of sayin HA u cont make me cum o_O weird i no, but ya i agree cuming from oral isnt how the girl does it at all its all mental, if i wanna cum ill come if i dont i wont no matter how good it is
    but one thing u should try if she is feeling bad if get her to giv u a hand job an whilst doing that just have her kissing you (good old snog) .. i like that dunno about anyone elce lol
     
  14. TearyGirl47

    TearyGirl47 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2007
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Tennessee
    Ok...I'm going to take a moment to brag here (because I'm VERY proud of this) but I give my bf head from 30 minutes up to 45 minutes. Yeah, it can get a little uncomfortable, but hearing his heavy breathing and feeling him thrust in my mouth is a great turn on. I like deepthroating him and I like that I have the stamina to go for as long as I do.

    I don't know if your girl would like to try to increase her stamina and see how long she can go. I think of it as a game in my head. The point isn't to have him come, but to see how good I can make him feel before he comes. If he wants to finish himself while I lick his balls, I still consider it head, and he seems content too.

    My bf has trouble coming in another girl's mouth too. I'm sure it is psychological because so many women do not particularly like the taste of cum. Talk to her about it. It's not that anyone is doing anything wrong. You do like the way she gives head, right? And she likes giving head, right? Just have fun with it and both of you relax. Is the ultimate goal in every sexual situation an orgasm? Yeah, orgasm is nice, but you also enjoy the intamacy and physicality of being with someone you care about. I know I do.

    kk, I've rambled forever now!
     
  15. polidicks

    polidicks New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 26, 2007
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    45 mins of oral? TearyGirl, u have my respect :p

    My last gf has similar bj qualities and it is indeed a great talent!

    Regarding the cumming part, I will definitely agree with Joe, I don't think it has so much to do with anotherguy letting himself free but instead might happen because of lack of adequate technique on behalf of his girlfriend... sorry to say so anotherguy, try to guide her on what you like!

    Btw you didnt mention if you enjoy her bjs or not...
     
  16. TearyGirl47

    TearyGirl47 New Member

    Joined:
    Feb 28, 2007
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Tennessee
    I thought of something after posting.

    Have you tried getting head on your side? I find that he can thrust in my mouth quicker and if he's really determined to come that we will get into that position. It is also less stressful on my mouth and throat. I don't have to do as much...I mostly just lay there and take a face f******. Get a pillow for her neck (comfort first!) and try it.
     
  17. MikeDog

    MikeDog New Member

    Joined:
    Aug 6, 2006
    Messages:
    815
    Likes Received:
    7
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    USA
    Good point TG that puts him in control of thrusting which usually helps.
     
  18. OMalakas

    OMalakas New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 11, 2007
    Messages:
    16
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Chicago, Ill
    i have this problem too. it feels so good but i just cant cum. and it think that whole "allow yourself to cum" is a load of bs.